mixed Posted June 2, 2016 Share Posted June 2, 2016 So in the last year my life has change alot. I've come out of an abusive long term relationship and am now living happily with my 15 yr old and learning to enjoy life again. I've another older child who's already left home, I'm in my early 40s. I hooked up with a friend last weekend after a night out, shouldn't have happened as he's in a relationship, but we've been getting pretty close, and it kind of just happened. And we didn't use any protection, again pretty dumb. The next day when I could think again, I realised it was right at my fertile time, 14 days in to my cycle which is very regular. So I ordered the morning after pill (levonelle) and took that about 40 hrs after the deed. Now I've been reading up about it and panicking, and it seems its not so effective if you're overweight (which I am a bit) and it's not so good after first 24 hours, or right at your fertie time. So now I don't know if I'm pregnant or not, and can't test for a couple of weeks. I know if I am it will change my life majorly, its not something I've even considered in the last 15 years as I thought I'd had my kids and was getting to the stage where they were responsible for their lives and I could start going out and holidays and doing my own thing. I know if I am I would never have an abortion, personally I just couldn't do it, it would screw me up way too much. No child I ever bring in to this world would be unloved or made to feel not wanted, I'm prepared to step up and be a proper mother if it comes to it. But I don't want to trap a friend either if I am. He's in a serious relationship and I don't want to rock the boat. So I figure on this one I've just got to wait a couple of weeks and see if I am or not. But the thing is now it's really got me questioning if I actually want any more children? I'm going from being terrified I am pregnant, to excited that I could be, to really wanting to be. And I don't mean just with this friend, I mean in my life in the future. I'm really questioning what I want out of life and I know it would mean I'd be nearly 60 (gulp) when it reached 18, but I don't know if thats a good or a bad thing, it seems mad to be thinking about this again at my age. Looking for some perspective please. x Link to post Share on other sites
Tayla Posted June 2, 2016 Share Posted June 2, 2016 Get an ept kit. All other matters are void until the results are determined. A history note: Only the Virgin Mary got to say "it just happened", all others usually had some indication of what they were doing. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author mixed Posted June 2, 2016 Author Share Posted June 2, 2016 Agreed until I know for sure one way or another, everything else is up in the air, it's just making me question everything in my life and really don't know what I want any more, that's why I'm hoping for some perspective to stop me going round and round in circles in my head! And your history note, whilst inaccurate from my views as a non-believer is correct, we did know what was happening, either of us could have stopped it at any stage, but a night out, a bit too much to drink and neither of us were thinking much at all!! Link to post Share on other sites
Tayla Posted June 2, 2016 Share Posted June 2, 2016 The perspective is get the kit. Your choices can be settled once known. Welcome to the board. Link to post Share on other sites
anika99 Posted June 2, 2016 Share Posted June 2, 2016 Most women do not conceive easily once they are in their 40s. Of course it happens. I got pregnant at 42 but I miscarried very early into the pregnancy. Middle age pregnancies are not uncommon but overall the chances for conception go way down. Your age combined with the fact you took the morning after pill makes it unlikely that you are pregnant. Let this be your wake up call. No more unprotected sex. Link to post Share on other sites
Daisymae2016 Posted June 2, 2016 Share Posted June 2, 2016 From what you've said, this is a wait-and-see situation. By taking the Plan B pill more than 24 hour hours after having sex reduces the effectiveness considerably. Obviously, this individual will not be involved in your future with or without a pregnancy. This was obviously an "oops"! That being said, I applaud your statement regarding abortions. Hopefully, within the next few weeks you will give some thought to your future....which ever way life takes you. Just know I'm thinking about you!! Link to post Share on other sites
ChickiePops Posted June 8, 2016 Share Posted June 8, 2016 Not sure what your beliefs are or where you're from..but I am staunchly pro-choice. I would say don't have a kid if you're not ready to take care of it or give it to someone who is. Also..PROTECTION NEXT TIME!!! Link to post Share on other sites
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