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Holiday dinner with the new bf


Family Parents too demanding? Sibling driving you mad? Tell us!

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Old 15th November 2017, 8:14 PM   #1
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Holiday dinner with the new bf

Thanksgiving is next week, my sister is bringing home her new bf to introduce to the family (my whole family FYI consists of me, Mom and Dad). I will be on my best behavior with him, I promise one and all, as will Mom and Dad. The last time she brought someone home for a holiday dinner was Easter 2 years ago. That came to an end shortly afterward, but I digress ...

My sister is 4 years younger than me (I'm 42 about to be 43). I think sometimes my parents and their friends wonder why I don't have a bf I've ever brought home to meet them in about 16 years. I'm not jealous of my sister by any means. I wonder if they ever wonder what's wrong with me. A holiday dinner is one of those things that makes you wonder exactly what IS wrong with me.

Just wanted to say. Anyone else feel like that?
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Old 15th November 2017, 8:32 PM   #2
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i'll be your stand-in bf for thanxgiving dinner, i'm only a couple hours away
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Old 16th November 2017, 10:25 AM   #3
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I am about your same age (I live close to you too, I can be your 2nd stand-in bf and blow their minds lol), same situation. Frankly I have gotten to the point I don't really care. If it ever comes up, I basically point out that I have yet to meet someone that doesn't complicate my life in a bad way and makes my life less stressful. It 'helps' that a couple of relationships I have been through are well known to friends and family and they get why I am ok with being alone right now.


I'm a pretty private person too, so even if I am seeing someone it is a long time before they meet my family so if it's a matter of "why don't you have a gf or a date", it doesn't bother me because I know even if they are wondering, they really just don't know about the women I am seeing and I don't care to impress them with my dates. Plus most of the women I attract turn out to be complete garbage and I would rather go stag than have my family talking about the garbage I brought to Thanksgiving dinner.
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Old 16th November 2017, 10:54 AM   #4
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Plus most of the women I attract turn out to be complete garbage and I would rather go stag than have my family talking about the garbage I brought to Thanksgiving dinner.
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Old 18th November 2017, 12:28 AM   #5
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Thank you both, OPs. I would love to be your garbage, ChatRoomHero.
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Old 18th November 2017, 11:03 AM   #6
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At your age you should be comfortable with yourself, and not worry about what you are perceiving others think of you. You may be wrong about their thoughts anyway.
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Old 19th November 2017, 7:32 AM   #7
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OP if it's any consolation, Im about your age, and I will be having my first Thanksgiving meal ever with a GF AND parents. And, yes I'm a bit nervous about the whole thing! Had girlfriends meet parents in the past, but this will be first Thanksgiving with both of them
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Old 19th November 2017, 7:37 AM   #8
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I'd honestly be thankful that I wasn't the one with a new boyfriend at at a holiday dinner because it can be so awkward .
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Old 24th November 2017, 10:51 PM   #9
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I have just come from the meet the bf dinner with my family and my sister's new bf. It went well. He had a good personality, he wasn't afraid or nervous as far as I could see. He brought my mom flowers! I was like "Wow, he's a good guy! He's interested, he's not there to butter others up and he's a genuine person!" In general it was a good night, save for my uncle who was there who is the happiest kid in the 1st grade who did nothing but talk about himself and monopolized the conversation. But that's another issue.
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Old 25th November 2017, 1:00 AM   #10
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I am so not a family gathering type of guy. I hate all that stuff. My GF and I just went out to eat on Thanksgiving. I didn't feel like cooking or spending the day with family.

Glad things went well. We are all a little messed up in our own ways, Mortens. Don't sweat it. Judging by this thread alone, plenty of guys would be happy to have dinner with you.
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Old 25th November 2017, 9:48 AM   #11
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Mortens, I have always had the reverse problem: for some reason I feel deeply ashamed to bring guys to my family, so I've always had to make excuses NOT to bring my BF at a time to family. I haven't even got comfortable to tell them I have a BF when I do (my family is at a different continent; not religious or conservative;... and still the idea to bring a man over makes me so uneasy, I think they'll think less of me for forever after that...)

I've been single this year for thanksgiving for the first time in 5 years and this way the best experience I've had so far, it went so well that I'm seriously thinking to postpone new dating for after Christmas to enjoy that holiday alone or with friends as well

I just wanted to say: enjoy your 'single' holidays while you can. Then you'd miss the time that you didn't need to put the 'happy happy' mask, worry about a bf embarrassing you in front of family or family embarrassing you in front of bf, and all the falseness around putting a presentation about your 'oh so perfect' relationship.


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Originally Posted by mortensorchid View Post
Thanksgiving is next week, my sister is bringing home her new bf to introduce to the family (my whole family FYI consists of me, Mom and Dad). I will be on my best behavior with him, I promise one and all, as will Mom and Dad. The last time she brought someone home for a holiday dinner was Easter 2 years ago. That came to an end shortly afterward, but I digress ...

My sister is 4 years younger than me (I'm 42 about to be 43). I think sometimes my parents and their friends wonder why I don't have a bf I've ever brought home to meet them in about 16 years. I'm not jealous of my sister by any means. I wonder if they ever wonder what's wrong with me. A holiday dinner is one of those things that makes you wonder exactly what IS wrong with me.

Just wanted to say. Anyone else feel like that?
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