Blade96 Posted January 15, 2016 Share Posted January 15, 2016 I live with my mom and dad in their house. So does my cat. about 3 years ago, my mom saw a wild feller, a big wild cat (feral) outside and she began feeding him and towing him around. So tha was fine. In fall 2015 she humanely trapped, him, catch, neuter, release. That was fine too. But while he was at the doc's, she said he had FIV (feline immune deficiency virus) If you don't know what it is, it behaves just like aids, except it's a cat disease that humans cannot catch. Ok fine. There is a greenhouse in our yard, and my father made a nice warm insulated box in there for him to sleep on. So I thought he'd stay out doors and we'd just feed him and he has a place to go in case of a storm or really cold weather. But in fall 2015 mom started enticing him in the house and now she has him in every day now. The thing is, I have a cat, Princess. She is 13, we had her since she was born. and my mom claimed to love her. But now she has this fiv cat in here every day, and my cat is forced to stay in my room with me. She doesn't have the disease and she can't even go out anymore and wander her own house, nor does she want to. She loved being in the living room with us, and now she just sleeps eats and drinks - in my room. I stay with her so she's not alone, She likes that. But our home isn't built to house FIV cats and keep em separated. Nor do I think my cat should have to be barred up in her own house. Thing, is I lost a cat to a feline aids (feline leukemia virus) back in 2009 because my mom wouldn't pay to get Princess and her brother vaccinated. so we lost him. Now, I fear for Princess. y dad isn't much help. He half ass agrees, but he doesn't stop my mom. what can I do to protect my cat? Am I wrong to insist my mom keep tiger outside and feed hi out there? Please help. Mom seems like she's very selfish, does what she wants, claims to love Princess but then brings in this other cat - with FIV. Link to post Share on other sites
Fleur de cactus Posted January 15, 2016 Share Posted January 15, 2016 I think Princess should be tested too because she was exposed to tiger before the diagnosis and symptoms may show after a long time. Once you are sure Princess is ok, you can think of FIV vaccine. I know the sick cat should be separated from the non sick one by finding a home without any other cats to reduce the risk of spreading the virus. But you are living at your parents home, I think your mom does this because it is her home and she wants to do what she wants. Sorry you have to go through this. Maybe you can find a good home to princess for now or move out. Good luck. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Wewon Posted January 16, 2016 Share Posted January 16, 2016 How old are you? Is this your mom's (passive-aggressive) way to try and get you and princess to move out? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Tayla Posted January 16, 2016 Share Posted January 16, 2016 well if compassion is a form of selfishness, then mark me down as selfish. There is a compromise for each of the residences. The ailing cat can be monitored out in the greenhouse for part of the day. Allowing your cat to roam thru the home. I think the bigger issue is two fold. Animals are living ... and as living creatures, deserve some comfort when ailing. Then there is the concern of transmission of such to your pet. Sounds like you've chosen to side with protecting your cat, and in turn it sounds like you are ired that a sick animal is in your home. Where would you like your cat to be placed when or if it gets a feline leukemia or such? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Blade96 Posted January 17, 2016 Author Share Posted January 17, 2016 well if compassion is a form of selfishness, then mark me down as selfish. There is a compromise for each of the residences. The ailing cat can be monitored out in the greenhouse for part of the day. Allowing your cat to roam thru the home. I thought about it, then saw this post and yeah that's what we're gonna do. (we all fell in love with the big tiger, I just thought it was sort of selfish to put my cat in a bit of danger.) And no, My parents don't mind us living with them. We mostly get along. There are some scraps here and there but I mostly get along with them, myself and Princess. btw I'm an adult, in my late 30's. Ok, I guess I have two kitties now. Thanks for your posts, guys. Link to post Share on other sites
Radu Posted January 17, 2016 Share Posted January 17, 2016 Depending on how old you are, your mom is lightly selfish to very selfish. Link to post Share on other sites
bathtub-row Posted January 18, 2016 Share Posted January 18, 2016 (edited) I think your mom has the right to do as she pleases in her own home. I also think they want you to move out. Even "some scraps" is probably a few too many from their point of view. Is there some reason why you choose to live with them? Edited January 18, 2016 by bathtub-row Link to post Share on other sites
anika99 Posted January 18, 2016 Share Posted January 18, 2016 Why are you still living at home in your late thirties? Why do you blame your mom for not vaccinating your cat that died in 2009? Why couldn't you cough up the money to vaccinate your cat since you were around 30yrs old back then? There is definitely someone being selfish but I don't think it's your mom. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
hotgurl Posted January 18, 2016 Share Posted January 18, 2016 if you vaccinate your cat she should be fine. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Blade96 Posted January 18, 2016 Author Share Posted January 18, 2016 Why are you still living at home in your late thirties? Why do you blame your mom for not vaccinating your cat that died in 2009? Why couldn't you cough up the money to vaccinate your cat since you were around 30yrs old back then? There is definitely someone being selfish but I don't think it's your mom. I never had a job and was never able to get one. I've had job interviews but they never ended in me actually having a job. So I have no money and had none. I asked my mom to have a little money vaccinate the cats because I wasn't able to. btw a bachelor of arts degree in russian language and history (mostly russian) there isn't much of a demand for any of that where I live. And when I apply for lesser jobs (gas station for example) I'm 'overqualified' It sucks because I'm not a snob and would work littler jobs but I'm 'overqualified' because of my degree. It's almost a liability rather than a help. (btw tell people degrees can hinder people from getting even small jobs. They aren't all that and a flying unicorn.) Link to post Share on other sites
VeveCakes Posted January 18, 2016 Share Posted January 18, 2016 Leave your degree off your resume? You should be able to get a job somewhere... Link to post Share on other sites
BettyDraper Posted January 19, 2016 Share Posted January 19, 2016 I never had a job and was never able to get one. I've had job interviews but they never ended in me actually having a job. So I have no money and had none. I asked my mom to have a little money vaccinate the cats because I wasn't able to. btw a bachelor of arts degree in russian language and history (mostly russian) there isn't much of a demand for any of that where I live. And when I apply for lesser jobs (gas station for example) I'm 'overqualified' It sucks because I'm not a snob and would work littler jobs but I'm 'overqualified' because of my degree. It's almost a liability rather than a help. (btw tell people degrees can hinder people from getting even small jobs. They aren't all that and a flying unicorn.) The trick is to obtain a degree in a subject which is in demand. Unless you plan on being a professor or a lawyer, there isn't much that you can do with a B.A in Russian History. I was studying English Literature in the hopes of eventually completing a Masters Degree in Library Science. I spoke to many librarians who told me that there were no career prospects so I promptly switched my major. Try trade school if you don't mind hard work. Don't put your degree on your resume. Link to post Share on other sites
Gemma1 Posted January 19, 2016 Share Posted January 19, 2016 Um, you could work in a restaurant without any problems. Restaurants are full of history/political science/liberal arts majors who can't find jobs in their fields. It's pretty insane to say that you can't get ANY job. I have a degree in a STEM field and I busted my butt in restaurants during and between degrees. But I digress. This cat won't pass FIV to your cat unless he bites your cat. If he's not aggressive, then you need to get over it. This is the kind of thing you have to deal with when you're in your late thirties and refuse to get a job, thus relying on your parents for everything. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
anika99 Posted January 19, 2016 Share Posted January 19, 2016 Impossible to believe that you can't get any job at your age. When I used to work at those lesser paying jobs I worked alongside tons of people who had degrees. The employers of those lesser jobs don't expect people to stay forever, they know people will move on to better jobs or marriage and babies. In any case, if you think your degree is working against you in getting a job then why are you leaving it on your resume when you are applying for jobs where a degree isn't required. Your resume should always be tailored to each job you apply for. You don't just toss out the same resume to every job prospect. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
O'Malley Posted January 19, 2016 Share Posted January 19, 2016 (edited) As someone already mentioned, the risk of transmission is low unless the cats bite or scratch each other. The onus of responsibility is on everyone in the household to spay/neuter both animals, get your cat vaccinated, if you prefer to be more cautious you can provide separate feeding areas, litter boxes, and spaces each cat can comfortably "own" to decrease the odds of transmission. This doesn't necessarily mean you should keep your cat locked up in your room 24/7, just observe interaction and only keep them in separate quarters if there are signs of aggression. Both your mom and you should set aside daily playtime for both cats; take turns playing with each cat. Both will feel more settled and comfortable if they are getting their needs met, and neither cat is being perceived as the "lesser" cat by either your mom or you. Family dynamics aren't always ideal but I'd wouldn't turn this into a dispute, try to find ways to improve the situation. Edited January 19, 2016 by O'Malley Link to post Share on other sites
Robert Posted January 19, 2016 Share Posted January 19, 2016 Please stick to the topic, which is in the original post. The topic is not her job or living arrangements. Thank you for compliance with this moderation directive, ~6 Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts