My mother! Grrr!!!!

[startinganew777]

We had family Christmas yesterday with just immediate family because Christmas eve and Christmas day is just too busy with the rest of the family. It was at my parent's house and they were cooking.

 

Now I am gluten free. Have been gluten free for about 3 years. My mom knows all about it and tries to make things gluten free so I can eat. She is a nurse too btw and knows how much gluten affects me. I am not a celiac but for the past 15 years I have been diagnosed with an autoimmune disease and have horrible joint pain everywhere and my knees swell up bad when I have a flare up. I can't even lift my arms up. Anyways, I did my own research over the years because doctors seemed to just want me to take a bunch of pills with horrible side effects, hair loss, mouth sores, kidney damage, liver damage, and I was in my 20's and didn't want to deal with all of it. It was a very hard time in my life as I was in pain 24/7. I figured I would try and see if I had some kind of food allergy. I stop eating gluten and bam! I am about 90% better! I haven't taken any meds for 3 years and the only time I feel bad is if I accidently eat some gluten.

 

Yesterday I go over there and specifically ask my mother what I can and can't have, what has gluten and what doesn't. She says everything is ok, she even substituted gluten free cream of chicken soup in the potatoes. Cool, so I eat everything with her saying it was ok.

 

This morning I wake up and I am in HORRIBLE pain. I can't even wash my hair because I can't raise my arms above my head. My knees are swollen with fluid. I have a bad headache. It is bad and I almost call into work but figure I will be sitting most of the day so decided to muster through it. I can not think of one thing I could have ate that had gluten yesterday. I am about to text my mom to make sure and she calls me and asks if I got sick from the roast beef. I thought she meant bathroom sick and I say no. She replies, "good because the roast beef aus jus sauce had wheat gluten in it and I just wanted to make sure." I am furious and tell her I can't have wheat gluten. She knows that! She then proceeds to tell me there was only a little in there and I am probably just sore from the weather change. Ugh! So that makes me even more mad and I proceed to tell her just how much pain I am in. She just replies saying I am over reacting and won't even apologize and then says she doesn't think about that stuff. Ok, well then why did she specifically call me and ask if I was feeling ok then?!

 

I am so mad I don't even want to talk to her. My aunt is a celiac and my mom is hosting a baby shower this Saturday and just wanted to see if I reacted to it because she wants to serve that beef on Saturday and wanted to see if it would be ok for my aunt since there was only a little wheat gluten in it! She told me I just get sore but she knows my aunt will get sick. Like she was testing it on me!!!

 

I am so furious I can't think straight. She is telling me I am over reacting and that I am ungrateful for everything she did yesterday. I mean, am I wrong here?! I almost called into work and she knew I couldn't have wheat gluten. She knowingly lied to me about it.

Edited December 21, 2015 by startinganew777

[whichwayisup]

Treat this like a nut allergy. Cook and bring your own food next time.

 

I think your mom didn't realize until after the fact and instead of owning it and apologizing, she downplayed and hoped you weren't as sick as you were. Also, maybe next time you have a reaction like this, call her and tell her to come see you so she can see for herself how much pain you're in.

[MuddyFootprints]

Your mother failed you, regardless of her efforts. Don't ever speak to her again.

[Tayla]

contact your medical doctor. Get on a regimen. If you are intolerent of gluten , then as suggested be your own advocate and bring your own meals. Family is too important , and that goes for your health.

 

As someone who believes in healthy diets, have a frank discussion with family on your dietary restrictions.

 

If a teaspoon of wheat was in the sauce its doubtful that it wreeked havoc ... most times with digestion the acids will break it up before hitting the blood system where the final triggers go into effect. So it goes.

 

Love your parents , you don't get them all your life... So discuss , resolve, and love ...

[GemmaUK]

I'm coeliac.

Many people know, my family included. They forget sometimes, forget how much or little will make me ill - fair enough IMO.

However, my own reaction is important to me so I take responsibility for it myself.

I don't eat what I haven't seen an ingredients list for.

 

Take your own responsibility in future.

It works!