kristinabopp Posted January 26, 2010 Share Posted January 26, 2010 wtf is wrong with parents today! I posted a story here before just look it up if u have time. My mom just wont stop minding about me. i went to an orientation for my work today as a nurse assistant *she made me apply for this job even if i have back problems* and so when im done i went straight home walking. she came home and she said this stuff: -you walk that far?! -so how about the money?i mean, you cant do direct deposit and you know that right.*and i told her, yea i know that, where do u want me to put my money if i have it on direct deposit?ON YOUR ACCOUNT?* and she got totally mad as hell and started cursing me and saying mean stuff to me and being a drama bitch! so thats where we started arguing, i mean, WHY CANT I JUST GET A LIFE OF MY OWN!when she started talking stuff again, SHE NEVER STOP! SHE WILL KEEP RUBBING INTO MY FACE ALL THE STUFF I DID LIKE WHEN I RUNAWAY AND IT LOOKS LIKE I HAVE TO FEEL BAD ABOUT IT!WTF! and she said that *oh what, your going to leave again?! and i said, YES I WILL GO TO SCHOOL! and she said WHERE?! i didnt respond to that, and she keeps talking crap!shes like saying i wasted my time in DC where the fact that i learned to be more of myself, i was HAPPY when i was by myself, i learned so many stuff when i move out. AND I REALLY REGRET COMING BACK HERE TO LIVE WITH HER! IM SO STUPID, I THOUGHT SHE WONT CONTROL ME ANYMORE!shes like saying, INSTEAD OF YOU HELPING ME AND YOUR 2 BROTHERS YOU CHOOSE YOURSELF MORE!YOU NEVER THINK OF US! and im like not talking back to her anymore. i IGNORED EVERYTHING THAT SHE IS SAYING EVEN IF IT HURTS SO BAD! and then when she left to go to work, shes like cursing and then when my brother asked her something shes like *IM NOT GOING BACK HERE ANYMORE!!* im like wtf is with this drama queen! i dont like family drama!!! she just wont stop telling me what to do and what not!she always ask stuff!she keeps minding my business! IM 20 YRS OLD OK!! BOUT TO BE 21 SOON! when i came back in here living with them, i became more lazy, i cant do things i want, she treats us like a BABY!she spoils my 2 brother so much, i just want the time to go faster so i can get the **** out of here! when i was in dc, i am determined, im organized, doing things i thought i cant do like*paying my bills*, i became more independent,im free and specially im happy. now that im back, im back to being a lazy bummer again. i have no friends in here, all my friends are in dc.damn it. i cant take all of this crap anymore. i mean, the only thing thats holding me back to not leave is because, she keeps making me feel bad like she will say that im too selfish and i only think of myself.shes saying that all the time. she makes me feel bad! and she said a while ago, that, if i cant stand this job im going to,she said in a mean way that *i dont give a **** on u anymore!here in the house u dont have to pay anything everything is free(eventhough its not)and she said, just move out in here and i dont CARE!* in the end she will just control me again. but whatever!im tired of her and her drama and her making me follow everything she tells me *she thinks shes right all the time she wants us to follow everything she says!* i know shes a good mom but its driving me crazy!when she starts saying stuff to me and mean stuff, i just wanna die in that moment just to not deal with it!i came to the point where i hate her right now! Link to post Share on other sites
Sweetcheripie Posted January 27, 2010 Share Posted January 27, 2010 Try to look at this from her perspective. She did her best to raise a self sufficient adult. While she was raising you she told you what to do, how to do it etc - she did that for the last 18-20 years - that is a hard habit to break. Now, she is frustrated. You are back home and by your own admittal being lazy. She wants to love you, wants the best for you, but she also wants you to succeed. Living at home doing nothing at 20 is not the definition of success. She can't push you out of the nest, but she feels like a failure - like she didn't do a good job raising you and her nerves are shot. How bout this? While she is at work, clean the entire house, make a nice meal, have candles and the table set. Have her favorite music or show on for her. Treat her like the wonderful mother you wish she was. Thank her for giving you a haven to come home to and how much you appreciate her. You don't appreciate her, her house, or her caretaking but ACT like you do and maybe it will come true. Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted January 27, 2010 Share Posted January 27, 2010 you should move out Link to post Share on other sites
Citizen Erased Posted January 27, 2010 Share Posted January 27, 2010 you should move out Agreed. I'm convinced there is a use by date when it comes to living with certain people, parents especially. Link to post Share on other sites
Sweetcheripie Posted January 27, 2010 Share Posted January 27, 2010 you should move out Short, sweet and to the point Link to post Share on other sites
Sweetcheripie Posted January 27, 2010 Share Posted January 27, 2010 Agreed. I'm convinced there is a use by date when it comes to living with certain people, parents especially. Wise words Link to post Share on other sites
Author kristinabopp Posted January 27, 2010 Author Share Posted January 27, 2010 sweetcheripie: im doing all the cleanings in this house, cooking, im doing everything. i barely get the chance to go to college because she wanted me to work when i got here, and when i did go to school, i took a program because thats what she wanted. i pretty much followed everything she wants me to do. shes just being mean to me again because she knows im moving out again and she knows that im tired of her making me do all the things that i dont even want. Alphamale & citizen erased: i will move out, im going to dc for college, im already processing all the things i need and submitting resume's online and also looking for a cheap room to rent. the thing is, by the time im about to leave, she will go crazy again like what she did before and will start cursing me and telling me bad things and will make me feel so guilty. but whatever, i wont listen to that again. i just dont like family drama's. i dont want to call the police just to escort me when im leaving, my friend did that because her dad doesnt want her to move out,so what she did is she called a police just to be able to move out, but i dont want to do that because thats too much,you know.. i dont know, sometimes, i just dont like leaving with hard feelings again. Link to post Share on other sites
Tayla Posted January 27, 2010 Share Posted January 27, 2010 It sounds to me that you'll need to leave on Hard terms and recouperate when the adults meet again. Its sounds like you are transistioning to the Adult stage with a few Child like attitudes in tact. One being - Love me but let me go. At some point you'll just love and not care on the let go part. That comes in time and thru years of adjustment to being an independent adult. As a parent I can tell you this, parents 95% of the time really do want the best for their children, its the way they show the best that seems to be in conflict. Your mom probably isn't portraying it in a positive light...so we need to shed our own light on it as the younger adult. ... outshine the negative. I wish you well in your journey in gaining self sufficiency. Link to post Share on other sites
Author kristinabopp Posted January 27, 2010 Author Share Posted January 27, 2010 thanks tayla. yea. i can tell that im going to have to leave on hard terms. :/ Link to post Share on other sites
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