DLUVLY Posted January 26, 2009 Share Posted January 26, 2009 found out through divorce proceedings my 6yr old isnt mine now what:( POed in Arkansas Link to post Share on other sites
norajane Posted January 26, 2009 Share Posted January 26, 2009 Is that certain - test have been done? Does your 6 year old know? At this point, it's up to you to determine what kind of relationship you want to have with your child. While s/he may not be biologically yours, that does not change your love or the child's love developed these last 6 years, and it doesn't have to change how you are with each other in the future. People adopt children all the time and love them as much as if they were their own. ETA: I don't know if reading this thread might help. Reggie is in a similar situation, although his has not been confirmed: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?t=174560 Link to post Share on other sites
Author DLUVLY Posted January 26, 2009 Author Share Posted January 26, 2009 we had a DNA and I wish I hadnt now but it was eating at me. He has a 10yr old sister and shes constantly picking on him about it and it puts me in a bad position around friends and family Link to post Share on other sites
quankanne Posted January 26, 2009 Share Posted January 26, 2009 D, that's a pisser about the DNA testing, but you know what? Being a sperm donor doesn't necessarily make someone a daddy. Taking the time to love and nurture a child gives you daddy-status. my oldest sister remarried a man who never married or have kids, and he took to parenting my niece and nephew like a duck to water, and I admire the hell out of him because he wasn't afraid to love – or discipline - those two like they were his own blood kin. He's been with my sister for about 20 years, and for all intents and purposes, *he* is their daddy, and PawPaw to their own kids, because he was willing to open his arms wide to them and be a daddy to them when they needed one most. And he will tell everyone he meets that those are very much his children – even his own family, who have not been kind about the whole step-parenting thing (but they're pendejos, so hey, it all works out ) and I know that even though both kids are in their 30's they still need his fatherly love because their own dad just doesn't know how to share that. so please don't think badly about how things have played out, but know that you've made a difference in a child's life, and that's never a small thing. hugs, quank Link to post Share on other sites
norajane Posted January 26, 2009 Share Posted January 26, 2009 we had a DNA and I wish I hadnt now but it was eating at me. He has a 10yr old sister and shes constantly picking on him about it and it puts me in a bad position around friends and family Kids can be very mean to their siblings and to other kids. I'd put my foot down and refuse to allow her to dominate you and the household and set the tone for this situation. You are the parent, so you need to step up and remind her/teach her that families are about how we treat each other - with kindness, respect and love - and that picking on each other and teasing is NOT allowed. If she persists, back up your words by taking away some privileges, like her ipod or computer for a week or until she apologizes and means it. I know you're upset, but you have to set the tone, or your son will have a much harder time dealing with this if you aren't firm about how you feel about him, firm about his position in the family with you, and firm about teaching your daughter to be respectful to others. Family counseling might not be a bad idea. Link to post Share on other sites
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