Myasylum Posted September 15, 2017 Share Posted September 15, 2017 Hello, Since my divorce wasn't planned (usually isn't) I had to get out of the house. I didn't have enough money for first months rent and security deposit, so I just got a loan. I needed food and other house hold items and needed to charge things. Wife served papers on me right away (Of course) and when doing the paperwork for Financial Disclosure I realized, Im screwed. I'm about $200.00 a month upside down from what I bring in. What will the attorney say? What about the court? I do have some assets, so they make you sell everything? Thanks! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Myasylum Posted September 15, 2017 Author Share Posted September 15, 2017 We don't own a house either... just 2 children. Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted September 15, 2017 Share Posted September 15, 2017 Not really enough information for me to go on. You said that you and your wife didn't own the house, so I assume she's renting it. And you would rent your new premises too. Is that correct? I can't imagine that the courts would *make* you sell anything which was given to you during settlement. But if you can't make ends meet on what you are earning, it may be wise to sell an asset to access the cash. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted September 15, 2017 Share Posted September 15, 2017 Hopefully you have the assets with you or they're under your direct and exclusive control. Do not in any way shape or form trust a woman who's filed and served divorce documents on you. Until/unless proven otherwise, she is the enemy. Sounds harsh, right? It took one guy sitting in his pasture with his .45 and a bottle of Jack Daniels decades ago, thinking it over, and an empty house behind him, to send the message. Fortunately, he survived, fought, got custody of his kids and is still alive, remarried and retired today. The main concern for the court will be the two children. That's one area you don't want to mess around with. Other stuff, variable. If you and she absolutely can't figure it out, a judge will do it for you in a couple minutes. Or less Link to post Share on other sites
mikeylo Posted September 15, 2017 Share Posted September 15, 2017 The court won't force you but your circumstances will. That's why they say going to the cleaners. Link to post Share on other sites
littleblackheart Posted September 15, 2017 Share Posted September 15, 2017 In what way were you contributing to your kids' upkeep before the divorce, and how are you planning on doing that now? The court isn't the enemy, it normally rules in the best interests of the children; if you can't support them, then you can't support them. Try to find a way to get back on your feet financially asap, for your kids' benefit. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted September 15, 2017 Share Posted September 15, 2017 Are you paying rent/mortgage on your family home, PLUS rent on your new place? This will be taken into account. You should see a lawyer. Many do a free initial consultation so there's really no good reason not to. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Myasylum Posted September 15, 2017 Author Share Posted September 15, 2017 Our lease was up on our place anyway. I went one way, she went another (That wasn't the plan). I couldn't really afford to have security deposit and everything on my own and get a lawyer, so I got a loan. That loan put me upside down. Through the years my wife had a relative that helped pay for children's expenses. Because of that I don't have much of a Idea what those expenses are... and I'm sure that relative *suddenly* won't be helping pay. I can no longer take for granted that "help" will bee there, so that's why I'm wondering if the court will take it out on me... and my assets. Sounds as though the court won't "force" me to sell anything? I had to list them in the disclosure. Thanks! Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted September 15, 2017 Share Posted September 15, 2017 Through the years my wife had a relative that helped pay for children's expenses. Because of that I don't have much of a Idea what those expenses are... ... I had to list them in the disclosure. Didn't your wife also have to list her financial situation in disclosure? You need a lawyer. You can't afford NOT to have one. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Myasylum Posted September 15, 2017 Author Share Posted September 15, 2017 Yes, I have a lawyer. I'm embarrassed to give it to them. I haven't seen her disclosure yet. Should be interesting to see. Link to post Share on other sites
littleblackheart Posted September 15, 2017 Share Posted September 15, 2017 Something is missing from this story, OP - are these not your children? The court doesn't take it out on anyone, but for sure they will ask you to fulfill your parental responsibilities. You need a lawyer + a good dose of reality. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Myasylum Posted September 15, 2017 Author Share Posted September 15, 2017 Yes, these are my children. What do you mean a good dose of reality? I realize I'm respocible for them. 1 of them is living with me. Link to post Share on other sites
littleblackheart Posted September 15, 2017 Share Posted September 15, 2017 You add details to your story in dribs and drabs. Why do you think the courts are out to get you? What is your future ex-wife contending, if you have nothing in common other than the children - are you concerned about the alimony she might be asking from you? Are your other assets in your name only? Do you have a marriage contract? Is your exwife a SAHP or do you both work? Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted September 15, 2017 Share Posted September 15, 2017 I have a lawyer. Then, you should be asking him/her these question, not a random internet forum. That's what you're paying him for after all. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted September 15, 2017 Share Posted September 15, 2017 Through the years my wife had a relative that helped pay for children's expenses. Because of that I don't have much of a Idea what those expenses are... and I'm sure that relative *suddenly* won't be helping pay. Wait....so you've got assets but relied on someone else to help pay for your children's expenses? Why did you not liquidate your assets to support your kids while you were married? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Myasylum Posted September 15, 2017 Author Share Posted September 15, 2017 (edited) I guess I just don't get how the process works. I Just figured if you and your wife are in debt the judge would just make you sell what ever assets you have to lower your Debt and split what is left of the debt between the two. I Just don't know how the process normally works. I'm in a no fault state. As far as receiving help from relatives for school clothes or what have you, you'd have to all my wife about that. I was never allowed to ask questions. I just went on my merry way. Wasn't worth the argument. My wife paid the bills and that was that. Edited September 15, 2017 by Myasylum Link to post Share on other sites
Author Myasylum Posted September 16, 2017 Author Share Posted September 16, 2017 I didn't rely on anyone... they just paid for stuff. That was my wife's deal. I had nothing to do with it. Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted September 18, 2017 Share Posted September 18, 2017 I guess..... I Just figured..... I Just don't know..... I was never allowed to ask questions. Well, now you are! Don't guess or figure. Ask. Your. Lawyer. Link to post Share on other sites
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