Bradddddd Posted July 30, 2017 Share Posted July 30, 2017 Its been two weeks, and my babys mother has left me for things i wouldnt change like smoking cigs and weed and hanging out with certain friends. And the one night i did nose candy. The thing is i regret everything i had did. I trully didnt get a grip on things since i was broken up with. Im hurt and im down ive been trying to go back to just three weeks ago when i couldve appologized for the things ive did and sincerely. Thing is i wouldnt give the things up for my family. When things got real i broke down and made a fool out of myself confessed how alone i was feeling and how i loved her so much and all the sobbing you could imagine. It all started when i just started to lose interest in her feeling as i became to comfortable with letting myself go and having someone there i was just taking for granted. Shes assurred me that i will find someone else and im a good guy and that i wont feel like this forever. It seems so real. Shes allready with somebody else who has a nice truck a good job and a house and it makes me feel like crap! Our baby is 8months old and i just left the apartment we had moved in with my grandparents. I lost my job because of the emotions i am going through and took a permanent leave of absense(mistake). Im not sure i have a shot at getting her back but man do i love that girl and i am genuinly trying to improve myself and watch and support my child as much as i can! Its just i need any advice i could get idk where else to go with this! It hurts because i want my family back and i live in such regret; my world is black and shes seeing this guy and everything os kosher for her. She constantly texts to see pictures of the kod when i have him and i give her as little talk as i can because im trying to "make her wonder". But right now i have no job no car no house. I feel defeated. I really need advice! Link to post Share on other sites
mrs rubble Posted July 30, 2017 Share Posted July 30, 2017 Two weeks and she has a new boyfriend, are you sure she wasn't already seeing him before you split up? That's pretty quick, and says a lot about her!!! The best thing you can do is concentrate on yourself and your baby. Try to ignore her. You need to stop moping and really start to look for a job and other ways to make your life better, once you are in a better place then you'll be more attractive to others, at the moment you are looking weak and needy and this does not come off as attractive. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Grumpybutfun Posted July 30, 2017 Share Posted July 30, 2017 Ok, I am the dad around here so you may not welcome my advice, but I really feel for you. I think we mature way later than women. We are at least five years behind at any given moment. Therefore, my only advice is to stopping so hard on yourself. Next, you have a family waiting for you and all you have to do is let go of things that establish you as a teen. Next, adore her, and let her know you are in this for life. Women need reassurance. Good luck, G Link to post Share on other sites
mikeylo Posted July 30, 2017 Share Posted July 30, 2017 Are you sure about the other guy ? If yes , then she was looking for a reason to leave and she left ! You can't do much. There is always a chance when it's only about you and her. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted July 30, 2017 Share Posted July 30, 2017 She constantly texts to see pictures of the kod when i have him and i give her as little talk as i can because im trying to "make her wonder". But right now i have no job no car no house. I feel defeated. I really need advice! Making her wonder by not talking to her is childish & won't work. It doesn't make her wonder. It reaffirms her belief that she made the right choice by leaving you & taking up with the other guy. All you can do is fix yourself. When you get your head on straight & get your life together, then & only then will you possibly have a chance with her, but that assumes she doesn't have another kid with this new guy. First stop the weed & the coke. If you can't stop on your own check yourself into rehab. Once you get clean, get a job. When you start earning money, buy yourself quality, reliable transportation (not a flashy car but something practical that can accommodate a car seat for your child). Pay child support. Spend time with your child & be a good father & role model. Think about going back to school. If you are old enough to father a child you are old enough to shoulder the responsibilities that come with that new person. Step up & stop wallowing already. Be a man. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Bradddddd Posted July 30, 2017 Author Share Posted July 30, 2017 Im getting my cna liscence ive stopped hanging with my usual friends and i am starting to work out. I giess time can only tell from here but i guess im looking for advice on how to determine when the time would be to reinsert myself into the picture to reconcile our relationship Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted July 30, 2017 Share Posted July 30, 2017 You continue to maintain your relationship with your child. You let your EX know when you get a job & start making those CS payments. At that point maybe 6 months in you start talking to her about more than just your child. Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted July 30, 2017 Share Posted July 30, 2017 im looking for advice on how to determine when the time would be to reinsert myself into the picture to reconcile our relationship As the dumper, it's up to your ex to reconcile the relationship. She's the one who wanted out, so she must be the one to think about wanting back in. When you get your act together, she will see that you've changed. She'll see a working man who's doing his bit to support his child. She'll see a sober guy who is reliable and responsible with access and caring for his child. But whether or not it's too late for her to change her mind....only time will tell. And you'll probably have to bide your time waiting for her new relationship to end anyway. Link to post Share on other sites
mikeylo Posted July 31, 2017 Share Posted July 31, 2017 When you have your act together! But it could be too little too late, so you've got to do more in little time ! Link to post Share on other sites
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