Dutchman1 Posted October 6, 2015 Share Posted October 6, 2015 Sunday night is going to be a sad night. On Sunday night I will tell my wife that I no longer wish to be married to her. I decided last weekend. I've been trying to make the marriage work for the last 10 years. I booked surprise trips, where I secretly packed her a suitcase, when I give her flowers every week, she accepts, and says: ok, I will put them in a vase later. The last 10 years I have been craving for love, understanding, intimacy and warmth. The love for my wife as a husband has gone. We just let it happen. We were always there for the kids and grandkids, they love us, and we love them 1000 times more. I will bite this bullet, I believe there is more for me. I can have a future with an exceptionally amazing woman with a heart of gold and as big to care for the whole world. Believe me when I'm convinced that she exists somewhere. When we are to be together, the earth will be spinning double time, or I will just believe that it is. No one can even comprehend that this woman and I will be together. We will someday. I hope that that day will come soon. She will be a prize, my prize, and I will cherish her, honor her and love her for eternity. I will work hard, and there is only one thing she needs to do for me and that is to love me back. Dutchman 1 Link to post Share on other sites
oldshirt Posted October 6, 2015 Share Posted October 6, 2015 I haven't read any of your other posts so I am not up to date on your situation. But from what I am reading here, it sounds like you are putting a lot of stock into someone you haven't even met yet. My concern when I read stories like this is do people build up too much of an image of what their fantasy lover (or affair partner) is going to be like and ten pull the ejection handle on their marriage only to find out their fantasy lover is just that - fantasy. IMHO the time to pull the ejection handle is not because you want a fantasy lover that may or may not even exist, but rather when you know you'd rather be completely on your own without them even you never do find someone else. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Dutchman1 Posted October 6, 2015 Author Share Posted October 6, 2015 oldshirt Thanks for the reply. The situation is that the decision to divorce was made way ahead. I've been living alone in my marriage for years, and not rewriting history. If I would end up alone, witch I really do not hope, I still would have divorced no matter what. It was really getting a shot at future happiness that came totally unexpected, and not an affair or infidelity. I would never betray my wife. Dutchman 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites
loveboid Posted October 6, 2015 Share Posted October 6, 2015 So romantic. Good luck! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Daisy2013 Posted October 6, 2015 Share Posted October 6, 2015 Good luck, Dutchman. You say you will be okay alone, but I hope you find her! I know that loneliness all too well, and it is hard to overcome when the "candle [finally] goes." 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Majormisstep Posted October 7, 2015 Share Posted October 7, 2015 Wow Dutchman, if your mind is that made up and nothing she can say or do could turn things around, then good luck in your journey. Be prepared for some type of reaction from her though. Rarely do spouses after that many years bid adieu to their lifemates, pat them on the back as they walk out the door with promises to catch up at Christmas and on birthdays. But if all goes as you have planned, I truly believe men have an easier time of finding new love than women do. You won't end up alone. Link to post Share on other sites
Popsicle Posted October 7, 2015 Share Posted October 7, 2015 Sunday night is going to be a sad night. On Sunday night I will tell my wife that I no longer wish to be married to her. I decided last weekend. I've been trying to make the marriage work for the last 10 years. I booked surprise trips, where I secretly packed her a suitcase, when I give her flowers every week, she accepts, and says: ok, I will put them in a vase later. The last 10 years I have been craving for love, understanding, intimacy and warmth. The love for my wife as a husband has gone. We just let it happen. We were always there for the kids and grandkids, they love us, and we love them 1000 times more. I will bite this bullet, I believe there is more for me. I can have a future with an exceptionally amazing woman with a heart of gold and as big to care for the whole world. Believe me when I'm convinced that she exists somewhere. When we are to be together, the earth will be spinning double time, or I will just believe that it is. No one can even comprehend that this woman and I will be together. We will someday. I hope that that day will come soon. She will be a prize, my prize, and I will cherish her, honor her and love her for eternity. I will work hard, and there is only one thing she needs to do for me and that is to love me back. Dutchman 1 Most of the time, I am happy when people here finally come to the decision to divorce, but in your case, I am actually sad for you. Not sure why. I hope that your new future brings you the happiness you deserve. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Popsicle Posted October 7, 2015 Share Posted October 7, 2015 oldshirt Thanks for the reply. The situation is that the decision to divorce was made way ahead. I've been living alone in my marriage for years, and not rewriting history. If I would end up alone, witch I really do not hope, I still would have divorced no matter what. It was really getting a shot at future happiness that came totally unexpected, and not an affair or infidelity. I would never betray my wife. Dutchman 1 Yes, you have courage and hope and I have so much respect for that. You've got it right and I think you'll do fine. Link to post Share on other sites
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