earlymorningshakes Posted July 24, 2015 Share Posted July 24, 2015 Hey there. After more than a year of separation, my divorce was finalized today. I was the one who cheated, I was the one who left (post affair...I didn't leave to be with anyone else), I definitely have no feelings left for him. But I feel very sad after today...just sad that the marriage failed, sad that I hurt him, sad for our kids that they have a broken family. Is this normal? The marriage ended years ago, the actual finality of the divorce hurts though. Along the same notes, I've been dating a FANTASTIC guy for a some months now. Love him to death. When I told him that I am feeling sad, he seemed hurt by it. Said he knows I can't help how I feel but he is very distant right now. I don't know how to make him understand this is separate from my relationship with him. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted July 24, 2015 Share Posted July 24, 2015 Hey congrats on getting that final dissolution. It seems like all that legal stuff takes forever. My remembrance of that day was, one, I took my exW to lunch and we had a good lunch and, two, since I was in town and my mom had just died, I picked up her remains at the crematory at the same time. I had processed both the divorce and death so, overall, the day was a pretty good one. Unlike your situation, though I had engaged in an EA a few years prior, once we split up I swore off women and continue to. Been down that road enough in life. Good luck in your pursuits and the sadness will resolve. It's normal for some people to feel hurt or jealous when a partner talks about a former spouse and with emotion since the new partner feels like they're not the focus of their partner. Most get over it. I would suggest not dwelling on the past M too much though, either the good or the sad. Even if expressed in a neutral way, some folks get perturbed by it. Link to post Share on other sites
NShine Posted July 27, 2015 Share Posted July 27, 2015 My divorce was finalized last week and I'm in the same boat. I had an EA, ended the marriage and even have a great girl now. But sad, much sad. So I'll just say that yes, it's normal and it ****ing sucks. Divorce is a death by a million cuts. Link to post Share on other sites
macmillerpwnz Posted July 27, 2015 Share Posted July 27, 2015 My wife cheated on me and acted like she was in love with me and that our marriage was in good standing. Once I found out she was cheating she told me she was not in love with me anymore and so now we are going through a divorce. I'm glad this is happening though now because I met the most amazing woman ever and I will never go back to my wife again. Her loss because j loved her a lot and now my love will go to somebody else. Link to post Share on other sites
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