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Merry Christmas ...


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Shocked Suzie

Not been on for a while, but wanted to say Merry Christmas to you all... Especially those who gave me much needed support over the last two years.

 

Christmas can be a very difficult time under difficult circumstances...try to hang in there and appreciate the little simple things in life.

 

It's been two years since my ex side swiped us and decided to leave us just before Christmas and then proceeded to do unthinkable things...

 

I promise those who are in the turmoil of separation that things do improve, they do get better and time does help heal.

 

Allow the process of grief, try not to fight it... grow from the inside out for you and your new chapter in life... Embrace it with both hands.

 

Don't give power to your ex partners, use it for soul searching, forgiveness and moving forward

 

Loving life, still growing n learning

 

SS x

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todreaminblue

hope you have a wonderful christmas suzie, bigger better and brighter for you ahead...hugs to ya...deb

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Merry Christmas / Happy Holidays to everyone.

 

Now if only I could get a weee bit of snow I'd be very happy, but the forecast does not looking too promising in that regard, at least at this side of the planet, so if anyone has some extra snow, please do fed ex some to me or simply rent a plane and fill it with snow and sprinkle it over my area. Many thanks!

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Shocked Suzie
Merry Christmas / Happy Holidays to everyone.

 

Now if only I could get a weee bit of snow I'd be very happy, but the forecast does not looking too promising in that regard, at least at this side of the planet, so if anyone has some extra snow, please do fed ex some to me or simply rent a plane and fill it with snow and sprinkle it over my area. Many thanks!

 

No chance of that here!! :) 27degrees today and very humid

 

Snow is beautiful at Christmas that's for sure

 

SS x

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Shocked Suzie
Merry Christmas. Glad things are better for you and wishes for a very happy new year.

 

Doing great thanks Steen :) hope all is well for you too

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Merry Christmas to you and everyone. I agree completely with what was said. This can be a hard time of year because things are so different but also agree that time does heal.

 

I wish nothing but the best for everyone.

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Especially those who gave me much needed support over the last two years.

 

It's been great to watch you evolve from shell-shocked victim to someone determined and able to regain control of her life and future. Hope the coming days bring you much happiness and, maybe down the road, a special someone to share it with ;) ...

 

Mr. Lucky

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Merry xmass.

 

Would take time to thank you all .. without your support wont be here .. Was remembering a year ago when she left me first time , I was in death bed after suicide attempt. Now instead Cracking Jethro Tull and hugging my dogs .. God bless you all you are my family here

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eblude...

 

Merry Christmas to you too.

 

You brought up a soft point in our breakup, I was sick.

 

She had planned it and knew when she wanted to break up (she brought it up during a vacation which was paid for by her mother...why then, I'll never know...I assume because that's when it manifested in her head.)

 

But, the day she kicked me out (two days after we got back, and I do understand this timing) I was sick with a 101 degree temperature. Caught it in the Caribbean.

 

At the time I thought it was overly rude and inconsiderate, making me move myself and what I needed to continue (computer, clothes, papers, toiletries, anything I needed to survive in modern America) in the evening while I had a fever.

 

I ended up reflecting, though, how difficult is was for her and that she needed to act regardless of my position. I know it sounds crappy, but she simply needed to act then or never. It was just bad luck for me.

 

So, just to bring it into context (kinda, I'm a little drunk, it IS Christmas eve and I AM alone), I LOVE Jethro Tull!!! and though I don't much care for dogs anymore, I am happy to hear that you are doing well. It gives me motivation to look forward to Christmases' to come and hope for better ones (OMG, they can't get worse, can they!!!) I can let this one go.

 

I congratulate you!

 

Ken

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Shocked Suzie
It's been great to watch you evolve from shell-shocked victim to someone determined and able to regain control of her life and future. Hope the coming days bring you much happiness and, maybe down the road, a special someone to share it with ;) ...

 

Mr. Lucky

 

 

Thank you for your support over the last two years... It takes time to wake up and start to truly move forward.

 

I hope one day too that I'll find someone special... At the monent I'm happy finding my way alone... Want both feet truly on the ground first.

 

SSx

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That was much needed thanks!This has been the one of the painfullest holidays I have had in 53 years on this earth.The others was the loss of my parents.Thank you and Merry Christmas!

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December 25 is just another day, actually. It is already another day in other parts of the World. A day is a day.

 

My Divorce process began in December 2008 (and finalized on September 21, 2012). Between that time, I had the freedom to finally have tree I've always wanted, a tacky, fake, artificial pink Christmas Tree with built-in Fushia Lighting (a Martha Stewart Original, I found on sale a few years ago). I keep it up year round in the upstairs bedroom that I painted "Hot-Pink." I just love bright colors.

 

This house is my house now. I no longer have to "hide myself," anymore. If any person doesn't like what I'm about, well, they cant walk their fanny right out the front door. There is no turning back, now that I'm situated in my "me" groove. My cute "Irish Accent" has even re-emerged, I'm slim and sleek, and my confidence is growing.

-------------

Those of you that are just now coming into the dark tunnel.............

 

At Christmas of 2010, my Mom was so pleased with me, my apparance, -- she said "my Yas is back, oh, how I have prayed for this day." [Even though I was desparately unhappy and broken-hearted as many of you, inside, while my Mom uttered these words, at Christmas 2010, there was something was something before her besides weight loss that was detectable]. My Mother could see that her daugher's spirit was returning, once being removed from an abusive relationship of more than two decades. My Mom passed away the month of the 3-day divorce trial, in August of 2012. Mother went to her grave with peace of mind.

 

But newcomers, I want you to realize that I cacooned myself in solitude for the following two years after that visit. I didn't see my Mother again, until she was on her death bed, due to my "obsession" with the worthless abuser, and my choice to be a recluse. I lost two years I could have spent with my Mother, instead, I used that time hanging around "here," wishing, hoping, analyzing, re-analyzing, fortune-telling, and generally making a complete idiot out of myself.

 

Accept, Accept, Accept. Move forward. This is the answer. If you choose not too, the time is not going to come back to you once you reach the point you're forced to face REALITY.

 

Merry Christmas my beautiful Shocked Susie, and to my Blessed LS Community! Yas

 

I don't do emoticons! :love:

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That was much needed thanks!This has been the one of the painfullest holidays I have had in 53 years on this earth.The others was the loss of my parents.Thank you and Merry Christmas!

 

Scatterd, I really thought I would be okay today. As Yasuandio points out, it's just another day, right? It's half over here in San Diego, and I saw my wife yesterday, we wished each other a Merry Christmas, exchanged gifts and it was pleasant.

 

But it's really hitting me badly today. I have avoided all of the holidays this year (Halloween, Thanksgiving and now this) as much as I could. I have NOT listened to Christmas music.

 

What's doing it is of course the family is coming over for dinner and I have to cook. People here are playing Christmas music, and "Blue Christmas" just played (not only a fav of my wife, but also completely how I feel.) I had to get out of the kitchen and come here to post this just to get my head out of my ass! I never talk about my feelings with people here. I just can't.

 

I just wish it was tomorrow. I know I have it better than many people and do NOT want to be a whiner, but I'm just so down right now!

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Shocked Suzie

So true Yas xxx so very true

 

Much luv and thanks ... Merry Christmas and to a new fresh year!

 

SS x

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Shocked Suzie
Scatterd, I really thought I would be okay today. As Yasuandio points out, it's just another day, right? It's half over here in San Diego, and I saw my wife yesterday, we wished each other a Merry Christmas, exchanged gifts and it was pleasant.

 

But it's really hitting me badly today. I have avoided all of the holidays this year (Halloween, Thanksgiving and now this) as much as I could. I have NOT listened to Christmas music.

 

What's doing it is of course the family is coming over for dinner and I have to cook. People here are playing Christmas music, and "Blue Christmas" just played (not only a fav of my wife, but also completely how I feel.) I had to get out of the kitchen and come here to post this just to get my head out of my ass! I never talk about my feelings with people here. I just can't.

 

I just wish it was tomorrow. I know I have it better than many people and do NOT want to be a whiner, but I'm just so down right now!

 

 

This is natural ^^^^ try not to beat yourself up over this. Any special date/occasion has this effect. All my family are together right now on the other side of the world, my ex is an hour away with his partner and her children/family..If you zone in on those things it escalates beyond belief!!!

 

Try to divert your thoughts, to the here n now... A simple task, remind yourself it's just a day, it will pass.

 

SS x it does get better, things will improve in time.... Breath and try to focus on other thoughts...

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Merry Christmas SS!!

 

 

What is it they say? "Time heals all wounds" and "What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger"....there is some sense in those words.

 

 

I hope that your journey in 2015 brings you much happiness and joy. :)

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Shocked Suzie
Merry Christmas SS!!

 

 

What is it they say? "Time heals all wounds" and "What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger"....there is some sense in those words.

 

 

I hope that your journey in 2015 brings you much happiness and joy. :)

 

Exactly Trippi :)

 

And to you too! Thank you for your support as always xxx

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Exactly Trippi :)

I just wish it was tomorrow. I know I have it better than many people and do NOT want to be a whiner, but I'm just so down right now!

 

Kenmore, I'm sorry to hear you had such a rough day, especially during a time where it seems that everyone is so cheery. Seems is the key word here because we both know there's lots of us that aren't that Merry today. And out makes it even harder when you have to put on a show for the sake of your loved ones when you're torn up inside. Once again, you're putting others feelings ahead of your own and look where it's got you. Maybe in the new year, you should put yourself first.

 

Good for you though to escape when you needed the break and reach out here. I seclude myself as well and don't like to share my sorrows and I'm thankful to find this forum to vent, and whine, as you say because when we're hurting that's what we do.

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Shocked Suzie

The beauty of this forum is to vent... Ive certainly done my share. It's a great place as many that post on here are a few years down the path, these are the people that hold LS together and support those in the early stages... They choose to post on here to support us lot "venting".. Kenmore never apologies for venting, that is what LS is for.

 

My 1st two separated Christmases were awful, had to put on a brave face for my also ditched children... holiday seasons, special dates and events are so difficult. This Christmas has been far from perfect, but because I'm much stronger through time and healing I cope much better than before.

 

It will get better in time... Never thought it would but it does

 

SS x

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