M30USA Posted November 24, 2014 Share Posted November 24, 2014 It's been 2.5 years since split. For the last 2 months or so, my ex-wife had significantly dropped it down a notch with the harassing and petty behavior. It's actually improved my mood quite a bit. I no longer have to deal with emails telling me that, if I don't put sunblock on my children EVERY morning (regardless if they go outside or not), then she will tell their pediatrician of my "negligence". Honestly, the ex doesn't talk to me at all anymore. I hate to say it's nice, but it is. I would prefer being able to talk like mature adults but, since that's impossible, this is the next best thing. I guess my months of not responding to her gas lighting finally paid off. Maybe I've finally trained her to respect me as she would a coworker. I suspect, though, that someone else is currently getting the brunt of her wrath. Possibly her mother, or possibly a new man. Either way it's definitely reduced my stress level. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Rejected Rosebud Posted November 24, 2014 Share Posted November 24, 2014 I hope you can move on soon from being so wrapped up in her! I know she's the mom of your kids but her bad personality or psychological problems are not your problems anymore! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
jakrbbt Posted November 24, 2014 Share Posted November 24, 2014 Keep posting. It would be good for some of us (well, me at least) to see what it looks like when one parent still has to co-parent with the other, unreasonable, formerly abusive parent-- but nonetheless begins to thrive and set up their own normal life and their own parenting, separate from the ex. Do you guys have joint legal custody and 50/50 parenting time? Link to post Share on other sites
Author M30USA Posted November 25, 2014 Author Share Posted November 25, 2014 Keep posting. It would be good for some of us (well, me at least) to see what it looks like when one parent still has to co-parent with the other, unreasonable, formerly abusive parent-- but nonetheless begins to thrive and set up their own normal life and their own parenting, separate from the ex. Do you guys have joint legal custody and 50/50 parenting time? We have "joint managing conservatorship" where she has the right to declare primary residence. She cannot leave the geographical area. Our total parenting time is split about 65/35, with me having the minority. So I have what is called "standard possession" in my state. Link to post Share on other sites
jakrbbt Posted November 25, 2014 Share Posted November 25, 2014 We have "joint managing conservatorship" where she has the right to declare primary residence. She cannot leave the geographical area. Our total parenting time is split about 65/35, with me having the minority. So I have what is called "standard possession" in my state. So, even with that amount of legally-sanctioned involvement in the children's lives, she essentially can't control you-- you are starting to separate from her influence entirely, it sounds like. That gives me hope. It will be good to see what it looks like if and when you evolve into a situation where she's ancient history in your life, even though you have the kids together. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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