Ruthie411 Posted January 30, 2014 Share Posted January 30, 2014 Been with my husband for 4 years now. Our relationship has been a challenge since the beginning because we're very different. He loves to party, being the center of attention, while I'm a homebody and quiet. Two years into our relationship his behavior towards me changed. He told me he didn't love me and that he wanted out to be able to find himself. During this time he put me through hell and we used to fight all the time. There were times he didn't come home for 2 to 3 days. Later on I found out he was "talking" with a co-worker but he says I was crazy and that she was just a friend. Back then I filed for divorce but he had a changed of heart and said he loved me and that he couldn't see himself with anyone else. I decided to give our marriage a second change because I do love him. After this episode we tried to make it work but although I love him more than anything I still didn't trust him. Anyway, the past month he started acting the same way as 2 years ago, saying that he loves me but is not in love with me. He again is saying he wants out of our marriage to find himself and live life because he's not happy. Said he's sorry that he doesn't want to hurt me but can't do this anymore because he's miserable. But again I found out he's "talking" to another co worker. He put a password on his phone again and his always snap chatting and texting her. He says she's just a friend that he thinks is cute nothing more. He says he's moving out next month because he needs to save money to move out but we're still sleep on the same bed and he still wants to have sex with me. It hurts because I still love him but I can't live with someone whom it seems whenever he questions our relationship and says he doesn't love me, there's always another person. He swears he have never cheated but all the red flags are there and I'm tired of believing him and feeling like a fool. I had asked him to let's try to make it work, go to counseling or anything else but he don't want to and he says he just want to be happy and focus on himself. I'm so hurt and angry because I let this happened to myself Twice! I can't stand seeing him in my house while he text or talk to him "friend" Is so disrespectful! I think I hate him now, can't stand the way he laughs, even his breathing bothers me. I'm not comfortable in my own house. I just want him out ASAP. I'm filing for divorce again, which he says he's not sure he wants because I will always be his wife, but I just can't take it anymore. I'm stupid enough to still hope he stills loves me and we can fix things. Link to post Share on other sites
RightThere Posted January 30, 2014 Share Posted January 30, 2014 I'm stupid enough to still hope he stills loves me and we can fix things. It's not stupid to want what you thought you had. But reality is different. And the more you accept what is right in front of you, the better you'll be able to understand what you need to do. He seems to be not very interested in being "all in" on your marriage. So I would recommend you get "all out" of it. That will help him realize what it's like if he doesn't feel like committing 100%, but it will also give you some freedom to just focus on yourself and stop wasting energy on something that is not returning what you need. Link to post Share on other sites
Yasuandio Posted January 30, 2014 Share Posted January 30, 2014 Once, shame on him. Twice, SHAME ON YOU. The writing is on the wall, hon. "Oh, how I wish I hadn't given that second chance." but why listen to me. Look into the mirror. You are giving him sex while he is sexting to another women in your presense? There is nothing that could be more demeaning (for him to do to you, and for you to allow to occur). I promise you, he will have the same character one decade from now. Two decades from now. Furthermore, by tolerating such treatment, and rewarding it with sex, you've taught him how to treat YOU. Yas 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts