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Keeping ex's last name.


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Just curious but why do some women keep their ex-husbands last name after a divorce? Especially if it was a nasty divorce.

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Not sure, but I imagine it might be a combination of the inconvenience of going through the paperwork involved in a name change, getting all personal documents re-issued. And then the awkwardness of having to correct people -- even those who know about the divorce will forget. It took me more than a year to adjust to referring to my best friend (I was the maid of honor in her wedding) by her married name, and in that situation I obviously already knew that her name had changed, so I was able to correct myself.

 

And if there are kids, obviously their mom doesn't want to seperate herself from them by reverting to her maiden name. Although my aunt did -- a particularly acrimonious divorce.

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why do some women keep their ex-husbands last name after a divorce?

 

I decided to keep my ex's last name after we divorced because of all the hassle a woman has to go through... the changing of S.S., driver's license, credit cards, bank accounts, etc., in addition to the fact, that I think it eats at him.

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OK, here is a follow up question(s).

 

If you have kept your ex's last name and your are soon to be married then what will you do? Will you take your new husbands name or keep your ex's? If you do keep your ex's do you think it's disrespectful to your new hubby?

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If you have kept your ex's last name and your are soon to be married then what will you do? Will you take your new husbands name or keep your ex's? If you do keep your ex's do you think it's disrespectful to your new hubby?

 

Well actually, I am getting married again. When I do, I plan to take my fiance's last name. I personally think it would be very disrespectful to keep my ex's last name once we are married.

 

The only way I would ever consider keeping an Ex's last name once I had remarried, is if my ex had died. Then I would make it

Kimbelry Exman-Newman as a kind of tribute to the man I had loved and lost. If the new husband couldn't understand that, well, there wouldn't be a new husband.

 

If I may add to my previous post, another reason I kept the Ex's last name was because it's who I have been for the last 9 years.

 

His last name is part of my identity and my history. Since I am one who sees my past as a learning experience, no matter if it was bad or good, it is still part of who I have become today.

 

Taking my fiance's name will be the start of the next chapter in my life.

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If it is too much hassle to change your name when you break up back to your original name AND get rid of a big part of your life, your ex husbands name, then why isn't it too much trouble to change it once you get married?

 

Are people just lazy?

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Yep. I am. Plus a name's just a name. Happens my married name is easier to spell and sounds better with my first name than was my maiden name. So it's staying.

 

Besides, I don't know if you've tried to apply for new personal documents since all this security stuff started going on but it is a whole lot more difficult to do so. I even have to get a whole new birth certificate - and of course all these documents cost money.

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