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Is my ex girlfriend stringing me along?


Hopelessromantic664

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Hopelessromantic664

Hello, me and my ex broke up in march and we lived together for almost a year. One day I didn't think things through had second thoughts and left. Now we are like best friends again. She's always there for me when I need something and I am for her. I help her out with her girls whenever is needed and her and her girls even got me a Christmas gift and invited me over for Christmas dinner. We talk to each other or text everyday flirt and so on. I know I made a mistake and I want her back I don't think there's anyone else I know her and her kids' dad are close but she has told me they're not together they do live together but she tells me there's nothing going on and I do trust her. What should I do I'm so confused I do want her back and I'll do whatever it takes to at least try.

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Aiuta le mani

Hello friend!

Thanks for sharing here! I see that you have establish a relationship with her and her family and they appreciate your support! If you love this woman and her daughters, you should think about a long-term relationship that gives you all stability and takes doubts and second thoughts away. Have you thought about marring your ex? If you still have second thoughts, maybe a friend or a counselor could help you clear your heart and make plan!

One thing that is not clear is why is she living with the girls’ Dad but if you trust her and you want her back you have some choices!

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Your post is a bit unclear. The title asks if your ex-girlfriend is stringing you along, but there isn't enough information for anyone here to be able to answer that.

 

If you want her back, have you spoken to her about it? If yes, what was the result? If no, then what are you waiting for?

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One day I didn't think things through had second thoughts and left.

Your problem is that you need to get her to trust you. You need to understand, within yourself, what made you do that to her and her children. Then you need to be able to help her understand what was going on inside of you. Then you need to be able to help her know that you won't do it again.

 

Do you see where we're going with this? Thus far you've been acting like you're the one who's been hard done by...but it's actually that you did that to her and, especially, to her children.

 

Figure it out for yourself, first; and only then see if you have it in your to apologize to her and to make amends so that SHE can trust you again. And only then do you get to actually apologize and ask for another chance. (Which she may or may not give you. Consider: Why would she want a flake in the lives of her children, who thinks that he can come or go as he pleases, without consideration and empathy for how he is impacting not only the children but also their mother.)

 

After you realize all of this, then tell her that you'd like another chance and are willing to be 'all in' as a responsible adult who is willing to savour the good and endure the bad - because adult life is both. And then hope and pray for the best.

 

Wishing for you that you will get the opportunity to not only BE the best but also have the best for yourself...and for the children and their mother.

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My biggest concern would be why she is living with her ex. Continue being supportive, but be careful she isn't using you.

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Hopelessromantic664
Hello friend!

Thanks for sharing here! I see that you have establish a relationship with her and her family and they appreciate your support! If you love this woman and her daughters, you should think about a long-term relationship that gives you all stability and takes doubts and second thoughts away. Have you thought about marring your ex? If you still have second thoughts, maybe a friend or a counselor could help you clear your heart and make plan!

One thing that is not clear is why is she living with the girls’ Dad but if you trust her and you want her back you have some choices!

 

I do want to marry her she's all think about and everything I care about and love I want to spend my life with her and share everything and build a future. I trust her on her telling me there's nothing going on with her and her kids' dad they stay together because they do coparent great and she works nights and she said she would rather there dad be there at nights than some random strange person as she is very protective of her kids. Me and their dad even get along great I would think if there was something between them that he wouldn't be as friendly toward me. It's kind of like he wants me and her to be back together as much as I do

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I am wondering why you up and left like that. That sounds pretty hurtful and also disruptive for the kids. Probably the last thing a mom wants is someone who's going to be volatile or unpredictable around her kids. I would have a very hard time taking another chance on a guy who had done that to me. The behavior that you are worried about might be stringing you along or it might be appropriate reticence.

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Hopelessromantic664
Your post is a bit unclear. The title asks if your ex-girlfriend is stringing you along, but there isn't enough information for anyone here to be able to answer that.

 

If you want her back, have you spoken to her about it? If yes, what was the result? If no, then what are you waiting for?

 

I did sort of speak with her about it she said she loves me but her kids come first and she just doesn't want a relationship right now. Idk what to do I love her I was dumb and gave us up once and I don't want to again I want us to work out I miss her. Do I give it more time or do I move on and find my new life without her at a new place to call home. I miss her :(

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Aiuta le mani

I am glad that you feel this way about her and that you have a good relationship with the kid's father! The next step is to earn her trust and show her that you want something permanent for her and her daughters! If this is what you want, she needs to know that you will be there and not leave! if you earn her trust again and commit to the relationship, you will be successful! All the best my friend!

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Hopelessromantic664
I am glad that you feel this way about her and that you have a good relationship with the kid's father! The next step is to earn her trust and show her that you want something permanent for her and her daughters! If this is what you want, she needs to know that you will be there and not leave! if you earn her trust again and commit to the relationship, you will be successful! All the best my friend!

 

Thanks I'm trying my best to earn her trust back and I know I've got a lot of work to do. I'm not making excuses but I'm a pipeliners and I might be gone away from home 10 months out of the year. It's easy right now getting to see her and her kids and spend time with them. I want to make this work more than anything she said she's got so much going on in her life right now with a full time job full time college student and all of her kids activities that she doesn't have time for herself let alone someone else right now and said she's not interested in a relationship right now but she never said no. I just want them to be happy and I don't know what to do I love her and her kids more than anything

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