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Dumpers regret or mind games?


Second Chances Called it off but doubting the decision now? Someone wants you back? Let us know about it!

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Old 30th October 2017, 8:02 AM   #1
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Dumpers regret or mind games?

Hi,

My ex dumped me around 2 months ago after 6 years together. She moved out and lives with her friend in her spare room outside my city.

Immediatly after she dumped me she was being extremely hurtful to me yet I kept my cool. I still tried to convince her to come back but after being blocked and her only talking to me when she felt like it I decided to stop reaching out as hard as it is!

Now she has called me a few times since but not said anything about getting back together. She will be angry at me one minute and then normal the next. She called me from a private number at midnight to tell me the doctor said she has lumps. She says she will call back on certain days but she doesnt and I havent checked for a while but I am guessing I am still blocked so cant even call her.

Anyways, the past few days she has been posting quotes on social media about love (good and bad) and recently changed her profile picture to a heart being ripped in 2 with the word destroyed next to it. This of course hit me hard - She probably knows I saw this but I dont know why she put that there, she even said she would call me the day she posted that but didnt.

I do care for her and love her dearly and would take her back, but I have told her this many times. It seems now I am not reaching out that maybe she is realsing what she had because I treated her so well despite the way she treated me. In her mind it was the other way round but perhaps my pulling away is making her reflect. Either that or I am completely deluded and she is playing mind games.

Confused!! Any input would be great :-)

Last edited by outlandish; 30th October 2017 at 8:05 AM..
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Old 30th October 2017, 9:30 AM   #2
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You're her emotional tampon. Her puppy dog. Pulls at the leash when she needs you and kicks you in the gut when she doesn't.

Were you submissive during the relationship?

Stop being a crutch to her. She has asked for a break-up. Honor that request. And that means NC and moving on. When someone doesn't want to be with you anymore, walk away.
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One regret, my dear world, that I am determined not to have when I am lying on my deathbed is that I did not kiss you enough ~ Hafiz
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Old 30th October 2017, 9:37 AM   #3
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Unfriend her on social media. You don't need to know what she's posting or doing. It just delays your healing.

After 6 years together, the change is probably jarring for her too even though she initiated it. It may be a combo of trying to find her way, wondering if she did the right thing & being mean to distance herself from you to aid her own healing.

If you don't want to deal with this yo yo behavior, simply block her.
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Old 30th October 2017, 12:42 PM   #4
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Sorry about your ex issues. I am not sure if you were married to her or not. I would find out from her why she left. Honesty and understanding each other's expectations are very important to a relationship. If she has no desires to get back with you, and you are not married, then I'll pray that there is a wonderful woman in your future. Get encouragement from a counselor or pastor. Be at peace and walk in a mind and heart without bitterness, judgement or unforgiveness.
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