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Two years later


Second Chances Called it off but doubting the decision now? Someone wants you back? Let us know about it!

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Old 27th December 2017, 3:29 PM   #16
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Well, update time!

We got together. He invited me down to his city one night on a whim and I told him I wouldíve came if he had invited me sooner. He told me he had invited me multiple times but I brushed it off. (In reality, he was casually dropping hints that I apparently didnít pick up on). Anyway shortly after that he came to visit me and we went to dinner and drinks.

It went well. Of course I was very nervous as I waited for him to arrive and we both felt that way at the beginning of the night. The drinks helped. We somehow ended up playing a drinking game and just sharing everything that had gone on in our lives while we were apart. I asked him if there were any defining moments or challenges he had that he was thankful he experienced. He told me it was breaking up with his gf (not me, the rebound). He told me it taught him that he shouldnít string someone along he doesnít see a future with just because he likes the person. We talked about it a bit more and I mentioned that our break up was similar. He told me, not at all, that he never doubted us having a future together, the timing and distance just wasnít right.

Ended up getting somewhat physical.

Yes, I know I probably broke every rule of meeting up with your ex again... (drinking, deep conversations, intimacy). But it was good to catch up and Iíve found that he seems to be even more interested in me now...this all happened right before the holidays and heís been trying to get me to come visit him now.

Again, still treading cautiously. I wonít say that Iím unintersted, but because I have been dating around and getting to know my new town, I am not in any place to put all my eggs in one basket. Itís kind of crazy that this all happened. Two years ago I never ever wouldíve imagined this, but Iím not really opposed to it so Iím going to casually keep pursuing and see where it goes I suppose.
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Old 27th December 2017, 4:08 PM   #17
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Thank you :)

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Originally Posted by MajesticUnicorn View Post
Well, update time!

We got together. He invited me down to his city one night on a whim and I told him I wouldíve came if he had invited me sooner. He told me he had invited me multiple times but I brushed it off. (In reality, he was casually dropping hints that I apparently didnít pick up on). Anyway shortly after that he came to visit me and we went to dinner and drinks.

It went well. Of course I was very nervous as I waited for him to arrive and we both felt that way at the beginning of the night. The drinks helped. We somehow ended up playing a drinking game and just sharing everything that had gone on in our lives while we were apart. I asked him if there were any defining moments or challenges he had that he was thankful he experienced. He told me it was breaking up with his gf (not me, the rebound). He told me it taught him that he shouldnít string someone along he doesnít see a future with just because he likes the person. We talked about it a bit more and I mentioned that our break up was similar. He told me, not at all, that he never doubted us having a future together, the timing and distance just wasnít right.

Ended up getting somewhat physical.

Yes, I know I probably broke every rule of meeting up with your ex again... (drinking, deep conversations, intimacy). But it was good to catch up and Iíve found that he seems to be even more interested in me now...this all happened right before the holidays and heís been trying to get me to come visit him now.

Again, still treading cautiously. I wonít say that Iím unintersted, but because I have been dating around and getting to know my new town, I am not in any place to put all my eggs in one basket. Itís kind of crazy that this all happened. Two years ago I never ever wouldíve imagined this, but Iím not really opposed to it so Iím going to casually keep pursuing and see where it goes I suppose.
Thank you for returning to provide an update, and please continue to do so as things unfold.

I think when you are at the place where you are (not desperate to get him back), you are more free to just what with what feels good.

I'm rooting for you wherever this experience takes you.
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Old 27th December 2017, 4:11 PM   #18
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MajesticUnicorn View Post
Well, update time!

We got together. He invited me down to his city one night on a whim and I told him I wouldíve came if he had invited me sooner. He told me he had invited me multiple times but I brushed it off. (In reality, he was casually dropping hints that I apparently didnít pick up on). Anyway shortly after that he came to visit me and we went to dinner and drinks.

It went well. Of course I was very nervous as I waited for him to arrive and we both felt that way at the beginning of the night. The drinks helped. We somehow ended up playing a drinking game and just sharing everything that had gone on in our lives while we were apart. I asked him if there were any defining moments or challenges he had that he was thankful he experienced. He told me it was breaking up with his gf (not me, the rebound). He told me it taught him that he shouldnít string someone along he doesnít see a future with just because he likes the person. We talked about it a bit more and I mentioned that our break up was similar. He told me, not at all, that he never doubted us having a future together, the timing and distance just wasnít right.

Ended up getting somewhat physical.

Yes, I know I probably broke every rule of meeting up with your ex again... (drinking, deep conversations, intimacy). But it was good to catch up and Iíve found that he seems to be even more interested in me now...this all happened right before the holidays and heís been trying to get me to come visit him now.

Again, still treading cautiously. I wonít say that Iím unintersted, but because I have been dating around and getting to know my new town, I am not in any place to put all my eggs in one basket. Itís kind of crazy that this all happened. Two years ago I never ever wouldíve imagined this, but Iím not really opposed to it so Iím going to casually keep pursuing and see where it goes I suppose.
You did just fine.

For some reason, I can read this guy based on your posts. What I thoroughly love about your situation is where you are at emotionally. You should be a role model for anyone going down the reconciliation path. You're cautious but in tune, you're slow but steady, and you're listening instead of hearing. You are handling everything perfectly.

Now comes the tough part. He has shown his cards with you regarding how he always saw no problem with the future with you, but now he is going to start doing some heavy thinking. I have no doubt by your actions and maturity that you are *extremely* attractive to him right now. Your handling of everything in the way you did showed the massive maturity of a well rounded mature female. He's noticed.

Keep going and doing things the way you are. You're doing just fine. Stay cautious and keep doing you. Things are looking good...
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Old 28th December 2017, 12:03 PM   #19
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How do you plan to address the snide comments if they continue? Do you dislike snide/snarky comments in general, or just about who you may or may not be dating?

I think his comments about you and other guys might be concerning. You have been open with each other in your talks, so he ought to be able to bring up stuff like this without making you upset or feel less than.
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Old 28th December 2017, 6:54 PM   #20
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MajesticUnicorn View Post
Again, still treading cautiously. I wonít say that Iím unintersted, but because I have been dating around and getting to know my new town, I am not in any place to put all my eggs in one basket. Itís kind of crazy that this all happened. Two years ago I never ever wouldíve imagined this, but Iím not really opposed to it so Iím going to casually keep pursuing and see where it goes I suppose.
I'm glad you met up with him because I think a move needed to be made. But I would be cautious. You don't live in the same town right? If that's what broke you up before, that problem will rear its ugly head again at some point. You don't sound like you're hung up on it, so I don't think it's a bad thing to keep your options open. However, the longer these things get strung out, the less the chances are that he will want to get back together with you. I wouldn't give him too much more time to make a move. I'm assuming you want to get back together with him. Be careful. Don't get too involved in this unless he's serious because you run the risk of getting hurt.
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