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Should I continue?


Second Chances Called it off but doubting the decision now? Someone wants you back? Let us know about it!

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Old 27th September 2017, 1:25 AM   #1
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Arrow Should I continue?

Hi all,

I have recently caught my bf of 2 years lying to me.

He went on an overseas business trip for 4 days, he told me was a conference. This is not the first time he went on a business trip or overseas trip with his colleagues. But what makes this trip suspicious was that he did not message me in the day which he usually does when he was overseas. He only called me when he returned to the hotel at night. When I asked for photos, he said he did not take.

My sixth sense was very strong on that day we met after he returned from his trip, I have to check his phone. There was nothing related to this trip, not even a single conversation on where to meet and what to eat with his colleagues or even counterpart. I knew he has deleted all correspondence. I tried all ways to search for hints and lucky or not lucky, I found that he has emailed some pictures he took with this one girl from his personal email to his office email. All pictures were only him and the girl, they were standing very closely, face side-to-side and bodies were close together (her boobs touching his chest). They took many photos and all the same position and closeness. He has never taken such intimate and loving photos with me before.

He said that they did not do anything, and the reason he took those photos was because he found her pretty and wanted to show off to his friends. He swore that he did not have sex with her blah blah blah… but this 1 I can’t prove, neither can he.

Things he did to recover our relationship:
1. Came to my house multiple times to beg for my forgiveness
2. Promised to put $10k deposit in our joint account and I can keep all the password and toggle (if he does wrong again, I can leave with that money)
3. Gave me all his passwords to all his accounts
4. He proved to me that it was really a business trip by emailing the counterpart to thank them for the hospitality

I am in a total dilemma because I don’t know whether to trust him again or not because this is the second time I caught him taking intimate photos with girls and deleting them away before meeting me.

I really wanted to forgive him and continue with the relationship but my head keeps telling me that this is not the right thing to do and that since there is no trust anymore I may get hurt again, but my heart tells me to give him a final chance.

I really need some help… please.

Tell me if you can accept your SO taking intimate and loving photos with an opposite sex.

Any advice is appreciated.

Last edited by blackbedjeans; 27th September 2017 at 1:30 AM..
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Old 27th September 2017, 6:34 AM   #2
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His offer to put money in an account doesn't sit well with me. It seems like he's trying to buy you. Having passwords is not the same as having trust. He'll just make accounts you don't know about.

If you trust him, date him. If you think he cheated break up. It really is that simple.
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Old 27th September 2017, 10:00 PM   #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by blackbedjeans View Post
Things he did to recover our relationship:

1. Came to my house multiple times to beg for my forgiveness
2. Promised to put $10k deposit in our joint account and I can keep all the password and toggle (if he does wrong again, I can leave with that money)
3. Gave me all his passwords to all his accounts
4. He proved to me that it was really a business trip by emailing the counterpart to thank them for the hospitality

I really wanted to forgive him and continue with the relationship but my head keeps telling me that this is not the right thing to do and that since there is no trust anymore I may get hurt again, but my heart tells me to give him a final chance.

Tell me if you can accept your SO taking intimate and loving photos with an opposite sex.

Any advice is appreciated.
Think about it? Do you honestly think you will ever be able to trust him? IMO, I doubt it. And the $10K deposit - you have got to be kidding.....so he wants to buy you.....sounds like indecent proposal but for a lot less. No, thank you.

And....NOPE, I would not accept my SO taking intimate/loving photos with the opposite sex, no matter how pretty/unattractive she is......time to have self respect for yourself and consider cutting loose. (IMO)

REMEMBER....this is not the first business trip he has taken.....
REMEMBER....he is not the only fish in the sea......

Good luck.
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