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-   -   How long should you leave it until you contact an ex? (http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/second-chances/635532-how-long-should-you-leave-until-you-contact-ex)

Marc35 20th September 2017 7:51 PM

How long should you leave it until you contact an ex?
 
My ex-girlfriend of 3 years broke up with me just over two weeks ago due to cyclical fights (basically the same fight over and over in various forms: she lacked effort and I resentfully bickered with her because of it). When we broke up she told me she didn't want to be without me and loves me, but she can't take the negativity.

During the break-up I asked her could we at least talk in the near future, to try to work things out. She told me to at least leave it until after Halloween. I intend to respect that and have been doing No Contact since, however I am also a little concerned that will mean No Contact for around 9 weeks. If I leave it until then, is there any hope of reconciling or will her feelings have completely gone?

Any advice would be appreciated!

d0nnivain 20th September 2017 10:34 PM

Reconciliation takes communication. NC is about healing & getting over somebody. Not talking solidifies the resentments & makes people realize they can live without their partner. Your EX already spent a year trying to make your failed relationship work. 30+ days apart is not going to magically fix anything.

Throwawayaccount12 20th September 2017 11:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by d0nnivain (Post 7420574)
Reconciliation takes communication. NC is about healing & getting over somebody. Not talking solidifies the resentments & makes people realize they can live without their partner. Your EX already spent a year trying to make your failed relationship work. 30+ days apart is not going to magically fix anything.

Sigh. I doubt I'll hear from her again in my case, then.

Late Nights 25th September 2017 1:02 AM

You still have a 90% chance that she will contact you. If anything Do NOT contact her. If she was the one who left you then she needs to be the one making the effort.

It's been 1 year since me and the ex gf broke up but I never went full NC up until like 2 months ago. I did all I could beg, called, text ect to only realize that there is no way of making them come back unless it's on them.

My ex texted me over the weekend to ask me to meet up with her to go have a drink n eat. 1 month and a 2 weeks of not taking she hits me up. Too bad I was out of town that week. I didn't get to reschedule it but all I can do now is to go NC until the next time she reaches out but then that's not garunteed.

I know it hurts to do NC but wasted what else do you have to lose since you already lost them? Your only gaining from NC. Be strong!

basil67 25th September 2017 2:29 AM

Yes, she may contact you again - but unless you can accept her as is without complaint, it's unlikely she will want to try again.


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