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What's she thinking?


fishyman

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Hello all,

my ex ended our relationship 3 months ago and we haven't spoken since. however we work at the same place and see each other daily in passing although we manage to avoid/ignore each other quite well but for the last 2 weeks whenever we're in the canteen at the same time I keep catching her looking at me from afar then looks away when i catch her only to look back again. Was sat with my back to her the other day and my workmate says she was looking over at me once every 10 seconds. Anyone have any ideas why she's doing this?

 

Yes I would love to reconcile but I'm trying to get on with life without her and as you can imagine it's pretty difficult.

Thanks

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It's very simple. She dumped you.

NC has been implemented.

She's 'reaching out' mentally to see whether she can trigger a response from you in order to appease her guilt, make herself feel better and believe you've let her off the hook.

 

Maintain your current position, stay NC, and do not waver from your course.

NC is NC for a reason. Because it works.

 

It's never about what 'they' do.

It's all about what YOU do.

 

Incidentally, the NC Guide was originally scribed by a guy in precisely your position: he worked with his fiancee.

By the time he established NC, she - the dumper - was climbing the wall in frustration that he was not reacting in the conventionally-expected manner.

You know, begging, pleading, crying, failing at work, turning into a blubbering, gibbering wreck.

 

I suggest, as I said, you keep on doing what you're doing.

 

I believe she will turn up the ante and try getting you to react or respond to a stimulus she will implement.

 

Continue with the way you're going.

You're doing exactly the right thing.

Show no interest, and make sure she sees you talking to other female colleagues, too. That should lso send a message to her....

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Hello all,

my ex ended our relationship 3 months ago and we haven't spoken since. however we work at the same place and see each other daily in passing although we manage to avoid/ignore each other quite well but for the last 2 weeks whenever we're in the canteen at the same time I keep catching her looking at me from afar then looks away when i catch her only to look back again. Was sat with my back to her the other day and my workmate says she was looking over at me once every 10 seconds. Anyone have any ideas why she's doing this?

 

Yes I would love to reconcile but I'm trying to get on with life without her and as you can imagine it's pretty difficult.

Thanks

 

I don't think there is much to read into here. She is probably distracted because she works with you. It's like you are right there, so it's difficult to ignore you. I would find a new job.

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If she wanted to be with you, she would be with you.

 

But she isn't, so she doesn't.

 

Looking at you isn't even a breadcrumb.

 

Its nothing.

 

 

Take care.

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