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Am I dreaming awake?


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Question for those who have had an ex (woman) come back (or if you're a woman yourself and have come back to an ex)...

 

Basically, was with her for 12yrs (I was 23, she was 16... I'm now 35, she's 28). Overall, it was a great RS and I cared for her more than myself all these years. We had drifted apart, apparently enough for her to call it off. So on Aug 12th, she did just that.

 

Closing in on 8 weeks now, I bought her out of the house which we had bought back in 2012. She's now in a VERY small appartment in a not-so-good area of the city. Her new circle of friends (which she met when she started playing hockey) hate me because all they know about me has come out the horse's mouth, so to them, I only have downsides and probably am an a-hole. She only last week managed to rent a truck and come pick up the rest of her stuff.

 

I'm still very much in love with her, even more so than before she left (and she's not, she told me). The void is huge. I am only now starting to have days without crying.

 

Now, I know everyone will just tell me to move on (and honestly, I'm trying to). But 12 years is a long time, and I do honestly believe that overall, I've had more of a positive impact on her than negative. I was the one to push her to get her driver's license, buy her own car, and I've helped her out countless times. She was the one who convinced me to get cats back in 2004 and now I can't live without my critters. She was a great girlfriend overall as well and a great person with many qualities which I valued very much.

 

So I'm asking you. Is there any hope she might change her mind in a couple weeks time (it's almost been 8 weeks already) or is she completely over me by now? (I know you'll all say yes, but I need to "read" it)... Keep in mind she hasn't been alone for one second since she left (always had a friend or coworker around 24/7) so she really hasn't had much time to reflect on the RS and why it failed. She mentioned she didn't love me, and hadn't for some time, but she admitted the decision to leave happened in a half second when we fought in the morning of Aug 12th.

 

Well, comment away! :(

Edited by TopperCNC
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Personally dude, if you truely feel you can make it work and are better together do it. don't do what I did, and wait months until they move on to reconnect. Just make a new start, and don't bring up the past with her.

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You need to find yourself, be the person she did love. Ask her straight and if the response isn't what you want, it's time to stop talking to her completely and move on.

 

 

I know you think dating someone else right now isn't the best thing to do but I can assure you it's the most powerful weapon in your arsenal, if she's ever going to come back and you just might find someone who really ticks your boxes.

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