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Is there any point of return?


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Girl I've been seeing for 4 months broke up with me because I blew up on her and broke her phone and just got too emotional because of past arguments. All the arguments were just about petty things and honestly I think became too needy with her and tried to control her.

 

After the breakup she still wanted to be friends and I agreed. The weekend after I got into an argument again because she basically called me to ask where one of my friends was and acted insecure and jealous. I told her after this I had lost all feelings for her and she was right that it was not going to work and nothing was going to change(regret saying this after). I called her one last time and she picked up(surprisingly) and sounded unaffected and told me she just doesn't want to argue anymore. That was the last time i heard from her as I texted and called her over the next 3 days without a response. Finally I texted her one last time saying that I'm not going to bother her and give her space and that i would be here when she is ready to talk again. She hasn't responded yet after 1.5 weeks.

 

How badly did I mess up? Can I recover from this in due time?

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How badly did I mess up? Can I recover from this in due time?

 

Very badly. Worse than I even and I was the champion..

 

Yes, you can recover. By not being there for her as a friend and not

contacting her.

 

How old are you btw?

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ThorntonMelon

Forget whether you messed up or not in the relationship. Focus on the fact that you're incapable of a relationship with anyone right now.

 

In two paragraphs youve described blowing up on her, destroying her property, being over emotional, persistent arguing, neediness, controlling behavior, and then persistent texting after being told to leave her alone.

 

What you need to do is find a good therapist and work on the things in you that will make you a great partner to someone in the future. You will likely find there were things about her personality and behavior that caused you to act in these ways, but also that you were quite a bit at fault. This will help you find someone who is a better fit.

 

Anyways, until you make this all about you improving you, the rest of this is irrelevant. As you currently stand, no, you can't be good for anyone, including her.

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Arieswoman

lovesick3,

I agree with other posters that the first relationship you need to work on is the one with yourself.

 

So take some steps in that direction therapy/counselling, whatever and get to know yourself and what makes you tick.

 

Then you can go back out into the world as a more balanced person ready to give and receive from others.

 

And before you ask the question - yes, I have had both therapy and counselling to help me move forward, understand myself and help me relate to others better.

 

Go for it.

 

Good luck.

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