EX GF breaks contact after a month

[Aquaman83]

make a long story short. I dated this woman named jackie since sept. We broke up last month.

 

so i sent her a long e-mail (3 days after our break up) (mainly explain my side, what i wanted to say when we were fighting with a clear head, say hey if this is what you want i respect and won't bother her anymore)

 

 

so a month to the day (last week) she sent me a message to my e-mail saying "hi"

 

so i respond thursday with hey

 

and friday she replied "maybe we should hang out again"

 

then she text'd me: hi

i responded: hi

 

little bit later i asked her, "whats up" (after she didn't say anything else)

 

and she said, "nm u"

 

i said, "nm" I put the phone down and said ok time for bed. (cannot make her have a convo with me)

 

so sat morning i sent her - if you want to hang out just ask. if you need time to think take all the time you need

 

so radio silence since then.

 

i text'd her yesterday:

me: hey

me: want to meet up this week for a drink?

 

she responded, " i keep going back and forth if it is a good idea"

 

I responded. take the time you need to figure it out and let me know

 

and that was it.. i went back to my desk and noticed she unblocked me on gchat

 

and i'm here.. thoughts?

[goldway90]

Well good she reached out and wanted to have a drink with, i think that's a good sign but the bad news is you kinda went needy mode on her( i'm sorry) too much texting her which led to nowhere, you turned her off so she became distant again.

Next time she contacts you, set a date to hangout ( after all that's what she wanted to do in the first place) don't go pour your feelings, just enjoy your times with her and please stop chasing her, just back off and let her do the work.

[Aquaman83]

Thank you for the quick reply. I thought I was responding slow, i used to respond right off the bat...

 

this has the slowest I have been responding since we first met.

 

I guess yesterday was needy, but in the past I have pushed hard for something I wanted. I think that might have been the main reason for the break up (she didn't omit it) - I was just too needy.

[goldway90]

It's not about responding slow or fast to her text i'm talking about the moment you don't hear from her you go on " Oh damn it she left omg, gotta text text"

She wanted to hangout but you kinda started chitchatting over text and she isn't into that look at her saying " i keep going back and forth if it is a good idea" She wants you to Be decisive and make a date, have fun ( no relationship talks). Good luck man.

[Aquaman83]

So, now I need to wait until she reaches out again. Ill jump at asking.. but i wonder if that chance slipped by.

 

I knew i should have jumped, but I didn't want to be 100% available either.

 

I would have said wed/thursday - meet for drinks.

However, she always does yoga after work. I get out later than she doesnt, and in the past while dating i would ask to hang out and she always said i may do yoga. If she does say that and doesn't do yoga she used to say i'm just staying in tonight.

 

She was a very indecisive person.

[goldway90]

Yes now you wait for days, week or months but you have to do your own things get busy, don't make your life around her i mean. If she contacts then ask her when she's free for drinks or invite her, make a date and that's it. No more texting like "what's up".

You have to be the man in the relationship, you lead, dominance, confidence is a turn on for women.

PS:Now with that being said if you want her more than friend then don't accept to be her friend ( if she give you lets be friends speech).

[Aquaman83]

She knows friends only is not an option between her and I. (I said this in the past, and with my last e-mail as well - i stated what i wanted in that e-mail)

[goldway90]

That's good, now keep improving in your life and don't put her on pedestal, remember BE A MAN, lead her , be decisive. It's the only way to deal with women.

[organizedchaos]

make a long story short. I dated this woman named jackie since sept. We broke up last month.

 

so i sent her a long e-mail (3 days after our break up) (mainly explain my side, what i wanted to say when we were fighting with a clear head, say hey if this is what you want i respect and won't bother her anymore)

 

 

so a month to the day (last week) she sent me a message to my e-mail saying "hi"

 

so i respond thursday with hey

 

and friday she replied "maybe we should hang out again"

 

then she text'd me: hi

i responded: hi

 

little bit later i asked her, "whats up" (after she didn't say anything else)

 

and she said, "nm u"

 

i said, "nm" I put the phone down and said ok time for bed. (cannot make her have a convo with me)

so sat morning i sent her - if you want to hang out just ask. if you need time to think take all the time you need

 

so radio silence since then.

 

i text'd her yesterday:

me: hey

me: want to meet up this week for a drink?

 

she responded, " i keep going back and forth if it is a good idea"

 

I responded. take the time you need to figure it out and let me know

 

and that was it.. i went back to my desk and noticed she unblocked me on gchat

 

and i'm here.. thoughts?

 

You blew it right up there. On Fri when she suggested you hang out again you got all wishy washy. Your response should have been something like "Agreed. Let's grab a drink this weekend"

 

It's not about being too available. Stop with that game playing. It's not about texting back too fast. SHE suggested you hang out again and you didn't agree with her.

 

So she began to doubt herself, hence the "i keep going back and forth if it is a good idea"

 

Had you agreed with her then and there she wouldn't have taken your ambivalence to mean you didn't think you should hang out with her.

 

Now you gotta wait for her to make the next move again.