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Has anybody gotten their ex back and how??


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I want to hear successful stories on couples who have gotten back together. I'm very curious and will like to read stories. I'm going through a tough time and want to know hope and faith still exist. thank you.

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About 2 years ago my ex gf left me. There wasnt any cheating going on, she just didn't feel it anymore between the 2 of us. We had a wonderfull time together. I didnt treat her like crap but with respect. In total we were together for 3 and a half years. But the last months, well things weren't the same anymore. I hadn't lost my feelings for her, but she did for me. She lost interest in my, lost respect...

 

We split up and I immediately went to NC. After some months on working on myself I started dating again and eventually fell in love with a new woman. From friends I heard that my ex had only been single for less than 3 months before she was in a new relationship. This with a guy who was a complete dumbass. Not a really smart guy, no work or any ambition..In my opinion a guy that wasn't worth half of me!

 

Around christmas last year my new girlfriend and I broke up after being together for 6 months. As soon as that happend out of the blue...my ex of 3,5 years contacted me by text...wanted to know how i was doing, wanted to meet up...etc

 

3 months later she has already said to me she is sorry for everything she did to me, wants to get back together, admitted all her mistakes, wants to work on it.. We have met up a couple of times, talked a lot, kissed....And are working on it...

 

But that all being said, it's not easy for her to gain my trust again. Anyway you put it, at some moment she broke my heart and altough she wants to fix it now...i am not sure this will ever be the case...Only time will tell...Its not that you kiss and make up and everything is forgiven and forgotten!

 

So to answer you question on how I got my ex back ? Guess what...there is no method! I just went on with my life, started dating someone else..It didnt work out and now...she came back to me. But guess thats just faith cause I was 100% sure I would never hear for her again. Sometimes they come back, sometimes they dont

Edited by Kermit007
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About 2 years ago my ex gf left me. There wasnt any cheating going on, she just didn't feel it anymore between the 2 of us. We had a wonderfull time together. I didnt treat her like crap but with respect. In total we were together for 3 and a half years. But the last months, well things weren't the same anymore. I hadn't lost my feelings for her, but she did for me. She lost interest in my, lost respect...

 

We split up and I immediately went to NC. After some months on working on myself I started dating again and eventually fell in love with a new woman. From friends I heard that my ex had only been single for less than 3 months before she was in a new relationship. This with a guy who was a complete dumbass. Not a really smart guy, no work or any ambition..In my opinion a guy that wasn't worth half of me!

 

Around christmas last year my new girlfriend and I broke up after being together for 6 months. As soon as that happend out of the blue...my ex of 3,5 years contacted me by text...wanted to know how i was doing, wanted to meet up...etc

 

3 months later she has already said to me she is sorry for everything she did to me, wants to get back together, admitted all her mistakes, wants to work on it.. We have met up a couple of times, talked a lot, kissed....And are working on it...

 

But that all being said, it's not easy for her to gain my trust again. Anyway you put it, at some moment she broke my heart and altough she wants to fix it now...i am not sure this will ever be the case...Only time will tell...Its not that you kiss and make up and everything is forgiven and forgotten!

 

So to answer you question on how I got my ex back ? Guess what...there is no method! I just went on with my life, started dating someone else..It didnt work out and now...she came back to me. But guess thats just faith cause I was 100% sure I would never hear for her again. Sometimes they come back, sometimes they dont

 

So 100% NC in those two years? Were there times that you miss her and wanted to contact her? just for a chat? I mean 3.5 years aint a short time, did you have that "sad feeling" like you just lost a great person in life?

It's just that it's coming up to two months for my NC, I'm doing fine, I just have those moments where I want to speak to her, in a friendly way and nothing else, but I've not contact her, not reply to her msgs, doesnt worth it.

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So 100% NC in those two years? Were there times that you miss her and wanted to contact her? just for a chat? I mean 3.5 years aint a short time, did you have that "sad feeling" like you just lost a great person in life?

It's just that it's coming up to two months for my NC, I'm doing fine, I just have those moments where I want to speak to her, in a friendly way and nothing else, but I've not contact her, not reply to her msgs, doesnt worth it.

 

Yes absolute 100% NC. No texting, no phone calls, no meetings, no facebooking, NOTHING. Did I miss her ? Sometimes but thats normal. Did I want to contact her at certain moment ? Honestly...NEVER. Because I knew that if I would have done that, and would have gotten an answer or a bad answer it would hurt me. So out of my own protection, I didnt do it and worked on myself.

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Seriously no matter how much you love the person, your best bet is moving on and never chase. If they came back that's great if not oh well it's wasn't meant to be.

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Lokin4AReason

let it be ... old saying, " what happened in the past, leave it in the past "

 

 

and some have mentioned, re kindling an old flame isn't worth because those feelings can be mixed ( as in neutral or a negative effect )

 

 

just keep great memories and look elsewhere IMO

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wow I respect you for that Kermit.

I do agree with NC, to heal and move on with life. The reason I asked that is because there are times when I do feel a bit sad knowing a great pal like her is gone. But then I thought, it's her decison, nothing I could do, and she lost more than I did as a result, if you know what I mean.

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All the GF's I was in a long distant came back to me within a week within our first break ups. The final no.

 

 

My 2nd ex of two years ago who I was only with for 6 months I have now started seeing as a friend. I can talk to her honestly and openily with no feelings. She even asked me if she saw me getting back with her. I said no, been there and done that.

 

 

It took me 4 months to be ok by myself with that breakup and my most recent ex helped me to get over her and now its the opposite way round lol.

 

 

My cousin's first love met his wife and mother of his children after a 3 year gap at a festival and got back together.

My Auntie got married for her second time to her childhood sweet heart.

So yeh it can happen but usually only after time. By then most of the time its to late!

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All the GF's I was in a long distant came back to me within a week within our first break ups. The final no.

 

 

My 2nd ex of two years ago who I was only with for 6 months I have now started seeing as a friend. I can talk to her honestly and openily with no feelings. She even asked me if she saw me getting back with her. I said no, been there and done that.

 

 

It took me 4 months to be ok by myself with that breakup and my most recent ex helped me to get over her and now its the opposite way round lol.

 

 

My cousin's first love met his wife and mother of his children after a 3 year gap at a festival and got back together.

My Auntie got married for her second time to her childhood sweet heart.

So yeh it can happen but usually only after time. By then most of the time its to late!

 

Thats something I have heard and read a lot of times. When couples do breakup and get back together it's best that they have been apart for quit some time and have been together (dating, relationship) with other people. Its better that way and the chance it works the 2nd time is greater then if you were apart but for a short amount of time or without dating or having a relationship with someone else...

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I have to agree, if reconciliation happens and it is to last, it would have to be after a significant amount of time has passed, at least 6 months of NC. After that I would think it is fine for either the dumper or dumpee to break NC to see if there is any chance of reconciliation

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Multiple times,with multiple ex's. It ALWAYS,in my cases, has fallen back to the same old schtick. Whether it's me who hadn't 'changed',them or both.

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My college roommate met her husband in the 7th grade. They were long distance through college & he dumped her to "explore" our senior year. Of course there was another girl. My roommate went on a few dates while they were apart. Eventually the guy realized nobody was as good for him as my roommate. He asked to come back. She kept him at bay for about a year. . . casual dates, only, refusing to be exclusive etc. She forced him to re-earn her trust. They have been married for 25 years. They are the only ones I know who reconciled successfully.

 

I had a guy dump me. I convinced him to take me back after about 2 months. We lasted less than 2 weeks. It was so obvious that the magic was gone.

 

I don't believe in going backward in life. Those cycles of break up then make up are ridiculous. Fix the problems before they tear the relationship apart or just leave it broken & move on to something more fulfilling

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I broke up with a guy in March 2013 and went strict NC for about two months.

 

I broke up with the guy because we were talking serious commitment and I freaked out and ended it. There was love, trust and respect throughout the relationship, so he honestly did nothing wrong. It was all my issues that ruined it.

 

I started going to therapy to deal with my commitment issues and in May of 2013, I texted him just to tell him that I had heard a song from his favorite band on the radio. He texted back a few hours later. But things didn't start back up again right away. I was still in therapy, working on my issues and I didn't want to make the same mistakes with him that I had made previously.

 

In January of this year, we confessed that there were still loving feelings there and made the decision to get back together, but to do it slowly. We've been friends since we were kids, so we have a long history together (both romantic & platonic)

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Here is a great way to get your ex back. "Improve yourself. Work on yourself. Love yourself! This is what attracts him or her back to you! People have natural chemistries. You and your ex obviously possessed a natural chemistry. It doesn't matter how far apart you keep sodium (Na) from chloride (Cl) the instant they are close enough to each other, they WILL form salt (NaCl), period! Same for you and your ex if you get back on track. So make it about you starting NOW!"

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About 2 years ago my ex gf left me. There wasnt any cheating going on, she just didn't feel it anymore between the 2 of us. We had a wonderfull time together. I didnt treat her like crap but with respect. In total we were together for 3 and a half years. But the last months, well things weren't the same anymore. I hadn't lost my feelings for her, but she did for me. She lost interest in my, lost respect...

 

We split up and I immediately went to NC. After some months on working on myself I started dating again and eventually fell in love with a new woman. From friends I heard that my ex had only been single for less than 3 months before she was in a new relationship. This with a guy who was a complete dumbass. Not a really smart guy, no work or any ambition..In my opinion a guy that wasn't worth half of me!

 

Around christmas last year my new girlfriend and I broke up after being together for 6 months. As soon as that happend out of the blue...my ex of 3,5 years contacted me by text...wanted to know how i was doing, wanted to meet up...etc

 

3 months later she has already said to me she is sorry for everything she did to me, wants to get back together, admitted all her mistakes, wants to work on it.. We have met up a couple of times, talked a lot, kissed....And are working on it...

 

But that all being said, it's not easy for her to gain my trust again. Anyway you put it, at some moment she broke my heart and altough she wants to fix it now...i am not sure this will ever be the case...Only time will tell...Its not that you kiss and make up and everything is forgiven and forgotten!

 

So to answer you question on how I got my ex back ? Guess what...there is no method! I just went on with my life, started dating someone else..It didnt work out and now...she came back to me. But guess thats just faith cause I was 100% sure I would never hear for her again. Sometimes they come back, sometimes they dont

 

It's an amazing story honestly it's so similar to mine on why we broke up and also the same amount of time we were together. How many months did it take till she contacted you again? I completely understand where you come from when you takes about how it won't be easy for her to gain your trust back.

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It seems like the "do they always come back?" one is a topic which actually comes back more often than ex's do. And I've just been browsing this forum for less than two months I think... :laugh: Nevermind, I always read 'em to fool myself (hope, that little bitch...). As I've inferred, everybody has his/her own opinion based upon his/her experiences. I've read countless posters saying that they had each one of their exes back, and some others stating that they rarely do.

 

In any case, why would you need a percentage? I think it's more like probability. You know, there is no empirical rule to deduce the number that a die will show. And the same applies with exes, imo.

 

Anyway, reading stories classified under "GIGS" do actually show a higher amount of comebacks, and, strangely enough, that uplifts me a lot. So keep 'em coming, and thanks for all your responses again.

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It seems like the "do they always come back?" one is a topic which actually comes back more often than ex's do. And I've just been browsing this forum for less than two months I think... :laugh: Nevermind, I always read 'em to fool myself (hope, that little bitch...). As I've inferred, everybody has his/her own opinion based upon his/her experiences. I've read countless posters saying that they had each one of their exes back, and some others stating that they rarely do.

 

In any case, why would you need a percentage? I think it's more like probability. You know, there is no empirical rule to deduce the number that a die will show. And the same applies with exes, imo.

 

Anyway, reading stories classified under "GIGS" do actually show a higher amount of comebacks, and, strangely enough, that uplifts me a lot. So keep 'em coming, and thanks for all your responses again.

 

Wait until she/he comes back and you start having dreams of their 'gigs'...it's all wine and roses...then..BAMB! You're left deciding if you can do it...it's hard. I walked away,myself. Couldn't take it...again.. ;)

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It's an amazing story honestly it's so similar to mine on why we broke up and also the same amount of time we were together. How many months did it take till she contacted you again? I completely understand where you come from when you takes about how it won't be easy for her to gain your trust back.

 

The first time she contacted me was mid january after 1,5 years of absolute NC. And yes...it's not easy, I mean this is a woman who broke my heart when she left. Now that she is back, she is sweet again, wants to make things right. But I still ask myself, if someone really loved you, would they really hurt you, leave you for such a long period ? She says that she realizes all the mistakes she made, wants to give it another try, want to make it work. Still I wonder, isn't she coming back because she has seen the grass on the other side for almost 2 years and realized it isnt greener ?!

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The first time she contacted me was mid january after 1,5 years of absolute NC. And yes...it's not easy, I mean this is a woman who broke my heart when she left. Now that she is back, she is sweet again, wants to make things right. But I still ask myself, if someone really loved you, would they really hurt you, leave you for such a long period ? She says that she realizes all the mistakes she made, wants to give it another try, want to make it work. Still I wonder, isn't she coming back because she has seen the grass on the other side for almost 2 years and realized it isnt greener ?!

 

wow thats a really long time and i hope to do the same thing i mean I'm doing well right now by focusing on school and going to the gym and basically just woking on myself. And yes exactly thats what i don't get if the person really loved you they wouldn't have hurt you, thats how i feel about that and i would ask myself that everyday. That could be true maybe the grass wasn't greener and maybe she couldn't find someone that loved her and cared about her as much as you did? What are you going to do? i mean do you still love her as much as you did she you first fell in love with her? During the time you guys have been apart what has it taught you or what have your learned?

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wow thats a really long time and i hope to do the same thing i mean I'm doing well right now by focusing on school and going to the gym and basically just woking on myself. And yes exactly thats what i don't get if the person really loved you they wouldn't have hurt you, thats how i feel about that and i would ask myself that everyday. That could be true maybe the grass wasn't greener and maybe she couldn't find someone that loved her and cared about her as much as you did? What are you going to do? i mean do you still love her as much as you did she you first fell in love with her? During the time you guys have been apart what has it taught you or what have your learned?

 

Do I still love her as much...that's a difficult question. I do still love her but is it the same as before ? At this moment I would have to say no...Guess we need time again together to build up, was has been broken down. I have learned that in the past I had put up with too much of her ****. She started walking all over me. That has changed...if she would start to treat me now as she did in the past, I would show her the door in a heartbeat

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Maybe I'm far too optimistic on this due to my unconditional love for her. But I think a second chance is a win/win ONLY if so much time has passed in between both chances. On one hand you have healed and learned to love yourself again, and you can love someone without actually needing him/her - that's why the feeling may be different. On the other hand, your ex has seen the grass ain't greener and may be able to appreciate you even more than before, not necessarily as a backup plan or second best. After all, I repeat. The dumper can hurt you dumping you, but all the extra pain of additional mind-wandering and melancholy is self-inflicted - I'm in there, by the way.

 

Why do children look so happy? They know no such thing as pride and do not care if playing with another child means reconciliation after a little fight.

 

In short, pride is necessary. There are some limits which cannot be broken, i.e. cheating. But do not be so strict that you may be missing golden opportunities.

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I'm starting to doubt that my ex will ever contact me again. My issues wasn't about falling out of love or GIGS it was insecurities and verbal abuse, therapy isn't going to pick up the broken pieces of my past relationship. By the time I make significant progress she would of already forgotten about me. Although I haven't checked her social media in over a week it seems like she has already convinced herself that I was a bad egg.

 

I know one day i'm going to check it again and find something I'm not going to like, but hopefully by then I will feel slightly indifferent, although I seriously doubt it.

 

NC has helped me a lot these pass few days, but it scares the living hell out of me that I have to pretend this person is dead to me. You know?

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Do I still love her as much...that's a difficult question. I do still love her but is it the same as before ? At this moment I would have to say no...Guess we need time again together to build up, was has been broken down. I have learned that in the past I had put up with too much of her ****. She started walking all over me. That has changed...if she would start to treat me now as she did in the past, I would show her the door in a heartbeat

 

yeah i understand where you're coming from and it will take sometime. I hope that you guys turn out fine and get back together and I also hope to be as lucky as you. I just never seen me and my ex breaking up to be honest and it sucks that we did.

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Having experienced more breakups than I care to remember, I think how you leave it, and the reasons for the break up are the two most crucial factors in whether they come back or not.

 

If it was cheating or physical/verbal abuse that ended the relationship and one or both parties left things very badly i.e. shouting, arguing, followed by continued chasing and stalkerish behaviour then the chances are slim.

 

If it is GIGS or just needing space after a long relationship and there is still love there at the end, coupled with a respectful mutual goodbye + strict NC to allow them the space to miss you and the good times you had, (humans usually look at the past through rose tinted glasses even if it wasn't all laughs and smiles), then there is a much higher chance of getting them back I think.

 

My missus left on the back of an argument, but really she wanted to experience life on her own for a bit and see what (who) else is out there because it was just the two of us for four years and she is 24.. (GIGS..?) total NC since valentine's day.. Maybe she'll reach out. Maybe she won't. But either way, I have learnt from experience that chasing never works! So this time I'm going to try something new, TOTAL RADIO SILENCE, no matter how hard.:lmao:

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Having experienced more breakups than I care to remember, I think how you leave it, and the reasons for the break up are the two most crucial factors in whether they come back or not.

 

If it was cheating or physical/verbal abuse that ended the relationship and one or both parties left things very badly i.e. shouting, arguing, followed by continued chasing and stalkerish behaviour then the chances are slim.

 

If it is GIGS or just needing space after a long relationship and there is still love there at the end, coupled with a respectful mutual goodbye + strict NC to allow them the space to miss you and the good times you had, (humans usually look at the past through rose tinted glasses even if it wasn't all laughs and smiles), then there is a much higher chance of getting them back I think.

 

My missus left on the back of an argument, but really she wanted to experience life on her own for a bit and see what (who) else is out there because it was just the two of us for four years and she is 24.. (GIGS..?) total NC since valentine's day.. Maybe she'll reach out. Maybe she won't. But either way, I have learnt from experience that chasing never works! So this time I'm going to try something new, TOTAL RADIO SILENCE, no matter how hard.:lmao:

 

Same thing for me. My ex probably left me to try out with different people. Got a new bf on the third week after the break up. The reasons were kind of stupid. Not ready for stable relationship, have to focus on studies, and picking all my mistakes, as if everything was my fault. Thinking of it makes me pissed all the time.

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