bray888 Posted November 21, 2014 Share Posted November 21, 2014 Would just like some advice on my letter, ive been NC for 2 weeks and I havent heard from her, is that normal? Anyway here it is: Just thought I would drop you off this note to let you know that although it has taken a while to come to terms with I have accepted your decision about the breakup. If I'm truly honest I guess I could see things coming a month prior I want to apologise for the way I acted after the break up. I guess with the combination if the shock and the stress of uni exams I displayed the exact qualities that you hate in people. I also want to apologise to you about the break up. I guess the more I look back on things I realise that there were areas that I could have done better. I was rather lazy and complacent and allowed our relationship to become dull and routine like. But hey I've realised these errors and are working on these aspect everyday for my future relationships with whoever they maybe. Anyway how are you going? How did your uni exams go?I would have messaged you but I felt it was best if I didn't. It's funny how life works though. Over the past few weeks some great things have happened in my life and I am looking forward to seeing what the future holds. I would like to share these things with you but perhaps another time, I think we need a little more space for a bit. Hope to hear from you in the near future Link to post Share on other sites
rester Posted November 21, 2014 Share Posted November 21, 2014 Great letter. Now fold it up, seal it in an envelope, and write on the front, "Do not open until November 21, 2024", and put it somewhere safe for yourself to open in ten years. Do not mail or email it to her. It will only make you feel worse when you get no response. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
dumbass2 Posted November 21, 2014 Share Posted November 21, 2014 Great letter. Now fold it up, seal it in an envelope, and write on the front, "Do not open until November 21, 2024", and put it somewhere safe for yourself to open in ten years. Do not mail or email it to her. It will only make you feel worse when you get no response. Agree 100% with this. I made the mistake of sending something like that after 1 month and is the only thing I regretted in the whole time I was with her and afterwards. I wrote other ones after that and kept them on my computer and did not send them. Months later I would read them, laugh and delete. Please give yourself a few months down the road with no contact so you have a different perspective and clearer head and the raw emotions are gone. It's still too fresh. Do not send her anything would be best for you. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
NopeNah Posted November 21, 2014 Share Posted November 21, 2014 Reads like one of the "how to get your ex back" books. I.e.: lame! Do not send that! Comes off as weak,whiney and plain creepy. Link to post Share on other sites
Bluesandy Posted November 21, 2014 Share Posted November 21, 2014 Great letter. Now fold it up, seal it in an envelope, and write on the front, "Do not open until November 21, 2024", and put it somewhere safe for yourself to open in ten years. Do not mail or email it to her. It will only make you feel worse when you get no response. Unfortunately, he is right...... please.. if you ever expect to get some news from her in a positive way, the only thing you have to do is.... no contact... That way, if she has ever some feelings left for you she will come back.. if not, you will lose points in contacting her, postponing any remorse from her.... please don't. And if she ever contact you, just be calm, and strong, make it as you were ok.... I am speaking by experience.. believe me.. Just be strong, and try to move on (sport, friends, family etc...) Link to post Share on other sites
Shields boy Posted November 21, 2014 Share Posted November 21, 2014 Please please please do not send that. I'm with the poster above on how it sounds like that "get your ex back" crap, especially the last paragraph. Textbook bull****. No contact dude. It's the only way. Stay strong Link to post Share on other sites
ralfgarnett Posted November 22, 2014 Share Posted November 22, 2014 Agreed just don't do it it's just not worth it mate sorry but its the truth Link to post Share on other sites
idoltree Posted November 22, 2014 Share Posted November 22, 2014 Agree with the others. It's pretty clear that you got the idea for this letter off the internet somewhere, using psychological tricks like "agree with the breakup!", etc. The title of the post is even "second chance letter." You're scrambling for a sense of control, of what you can do to steer the remnants of the lost relationship back toward the lost relationship. Those are normal feelings, but see them for what they are - pointless. The truth is that because this involves another person with free will, you're not in control and you never will be. Don't send a letter. It's not sincere and someday you will look back and cringe at your behavior. Spend your time focusing on your life, accepting the pain that you're not in control, and use the beauty and truth of that pain to work through your emotions and move forward in your own life. If she wants you back, she knows how to reach you. That's a truth that never changes. Take solace in that, stop worrying about her, and heal yourself. Link to post Share on other sites
travelbug1996 Posted November 22, 2014 Share Posted November 22, 2014 Please don't send this letter. Link to post Share on other sites
chados Posted November 22, 2014 Share Posted November 22, 2014 dont send a letter. text your ex back doesnt work. you need to man up and tell her you understand why this happened. two things you can do. either just leave it. or call her up and tell her without appologizing like everything is your fault. tell her you understand why the breakup occured and that you want her to be happy with whatever she decides to do. dont beg or act like you need her to come back. it doesnt work and it will make things worse. dont even talk about taking her back to be honest. she will if she can forget about the past. you cant talk anyone back, you have to act and change if its worth changing. Link to post Share on other sites
Simon Phoenix Posted November 22, 2014 Share Posted November 22, 2014 Sending letters = awful strategy. It can be therapeutic to write them, but never send. Ever. Link to post Share on other sites
redbaron005 Posted November 23, 2014 Share Posted November 23, 2014 Just in case today you are still thinking about sending this, don't do it. Link to post Share on other sites
blackcat777 Posted November 23, 2014 Share Posted November 23, 2014 I wrote a bunch of letters. Never sent them. Then, when I was ready... burned them. Link to post Share on other sites
AlexfromBoston Posted November 26, 2014 Share Posted November 26, 2014 Never, and I mean NEVER send a written letter to an ex girlfriend indicating that you agree with a breakup...especially if you have only been separated for 2 weeks. In my personal opinion, hand written letters are creepy and calculated. The last time I have ever written a girlfriend a personal letters was during bootcamp on USMC letterhead, as my cell was secured in a contraband locker. It felt creepy then and I had an excuse. Stick to NC and just act like you don't give a f*ck...trust me. It seems like women have this sense for it. As soon as their ex starts having fun and enjoying himself, your attraction shoots to the moon. If you can manage to keep it together, there may be hope that she will hit you up first. If not, oh well...just get a younger, better looking girl. Link to post Share on other sites
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