JG5 Posted April 17, 2013 Share Posted April 17, 2013 I've been through a lot of stress in the past few weeks due to being extremely busy through school, pledging in a fraternity, and participating in Greek week events every day. And this stress caused me to act differently around my girlfriend. She broke up with me recently, just when I was finished with everything and was planning to make up for not being around. Her reason was that I'm an awesome person but it's not working for her. We were really happy before I became so busy, and I know we can do it again. I'm talking with her later about our relationship and I wrote this to say to her. Do you think that she might give me another chance? I've been thinking about our relationship, and while I respect your decision, I still feel like we still have a lot more left to give to a relationship with each other. I know the last few weeks of us being together were less than ideal, and I wish I could have spent more time with you, Because you are an amazing person and you deserve to be treated as such. And I was so entrenched in my own stress that I didn't consider you as much as I should have. I didn't appreciate what I had until it was gone. But while it was a dry period for us, I can't imagine that everything that we enjoyed about each other was lost during this time. I'm not the same person that I was for the last few weeks, I'm practically finished with the stresses of my pledge process, and I'm back to the same level of optimism and fun loving as I was when we first started dating. And I'm saying this to you because I don't think our relationship should have ended this abruptly. This week I had planned to make up for the time I didn't spend with you, but I wasn't given the chance. We are so similar to each other that I know we still have the ability to bring each other happiness. I want to have another day like when we went to Pittsburgh and we spent so much time talking, joking around, and enjoying each others company. I want another time like after Snowball when we watched a movie and you fell asleep in my arms. I saw your valentines day card on my desk and it was written with so much affection that I can't believe that all of it just faded away. Just a few weeks ago, before easter, we were really happy together, and I know we can bring that back. So I'm asking you to consider giving our relationship a second chance, because I believe it deserves a second chance. Allow me to take you out one more time, next Saturday, when classes are finished and we can just have fun for a day, and determine if we still have the ability to be together. I know thats a long time away, but maybe we can still talk in the meantime. And if at the end of the day it doesn't work out, than at the very least, if you are comfortable with it, we can bring closure to our relationship and agree to just be friends. I can't imagine never talking to you again, and I won't let such an amazing person leave my life without at least trying to bring them back. So please consider what I said, because this is me trying to communicate with you in the most mature, heartfelt,and honest way possible. Link to post Share on other sites
crederer Posted April 17, 2013 Share Posted April 17, 2013 While that covers some ground regarding how you feel you did her wrong, she probably ended it for other reasons as well. The only way she'll take you back is if she really wants to, and I hate to say it, but I don't think that would be enough. She probably had other issues that she wasn't willing or wanting to talk about and this other stuff just pushed her over the edge. Now that you sent that e-mail I'd suggest going into NC and maybe she'll realize that what you had was good. Link to post Share on other sites
Author JG5 Posted April 17, 2013 Author Share Posted April 17, 2013 This isn't something that I've actually said to her yet. I feel like I should at least try to communicate this with her, but is there anything I can change to make it even slightly more likely to succeed? Keep in mind this isn't an email, I will be talking to her face to face, and this isn't exactly what I'm going to say, it's more of a starting point so that I can prepare to speak with her. Link to post Share on other sites
foreverandalways Posted April 17, 2013 Share Posted April 17, 2013 Had she mentioned concerns she had prior to ending it? If not, it's really not fair to not address issues she was having and giving you the opportunity to fix it. Expecially since the issues were not abuse (emotional or physical), you didn't cheat, you dont have a drug problem, etc. If she is just the type of person who wants to walk away when things get tough, that's not a good sign for your future, as everyone does have to put some work and effort into their relationships. It's not all smiles and rainbows all of the time. But if you really care about one another, you should want to try to make it work. Not just leave at the first sign of things not going your way. I do respect that you can recognize being neglectful, and hopefully if you do get another chance you can both work on talking through things before it gets so bad that it just ends. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
foreverandalways Posted April 17, 2013 Share Posted April 17, 2013 Oh, and I like the first part, where you recognize where you went wrong. But don't do the reminiscing and other stuff. You don't want to look sad and needy in her eyes. I see why you're doing it, but scale it down a bit. And you don't want to convince her to come back. You want her to see what a great person you are, and have her want to come back. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author JG5 Posted April 17, 2013 Author Share Posted April 17, 2013 Thank you for your advice, I definitely see what you are saying. And she never mentioned any problems that we were having, that's why I was taken so off guard when she ended it. But she really isn't one to talk about her problems anyway. Link to post Share on other sites
TheFriend Posted April 18, 2013 Share Posted April 18, 2013 Jg just be careful if you send this to wait for her to communicate again. You do not want to dig yourself a hole by continuously attempting to contact her. I am speaking from experience and was left unexpectedly by a girl who did not share her feelings/emotions as well. I do think for the most part your letter is good by the way. Link to post Share on other sites
jjjman Posted April 18, 2013 Share Posted April 18, 2013 JG5 is it a letter for her or is it a speech you prepare to tell her face to face? Link to post Share on other sites
intigo Posted April 22, 2013 Share Posted April 22, 2013 JG5 is it a letter for her or is it a speech you prepare to tell her face to face? You are in my mind say these things looking at her, do not ask for another chance she ll get the point anyway, do not ask her out if she want she ll contact you. After that there is nothing you can do. Link to post Share on other sites
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