Taking things slow..

[Jdw_Icequeen]

Well here is a small recap. Broke up almost a month ago after a little over a yr. We have a baby together.. Things were stressful he says he just wasn't happy anymore. Still loved me wasn't in love.. He sais he was sure things were over though.

 

After a week of no contact I needed baby formula. I txted, he brought it over the next day. Seemed very happy to see me.. I nicley got a few things off my chest about the breakup he didn't mind.We agreed to be friends and possibly hang out.. He gave me a big hug before leaving didn't stay long.. The next day he texts saying I really miss talking to you everyday.

 

I know that we had alot of happy times together and have alot invested in eachother. So I don't want to say that things are definetly over.

 

So he txts me everyday making small talk I txt back. I do have a few emotional upsets and apologized. I'm only human. Well of course he stops txting me as much lol. So then I am txting him first instead of vice versa.

 

Lets just say I have defiently made ALL the mistakes and a few extras on my part!! lol So the next time we hang out I feel very nervous and anxious. He seemed very guarded made alot of comments about things which didn't include me in his future. So he leaves and I am just like screw it! He knows I don't have a problem moving on from us. So I txted and just laid it out there. "Were truly over aren't we" He says no I still have alot to think about.

 

He says he is 50 50 on the issue. Everytime we start txting I do somthing to screw it up lol.. I get upset or emotional ask to many questions!

SHAME! Yes this is where alot of you say WELL DON"T contact him.

Well when taking things "slow" there is no real rules. He has had strep the last week and I have been txting to see how he is doing. Being friendly. But he dosen't txt me anymore.

 

So he still seems pretty confused. I know I am not helping. I am going to leave him alone though. I think this was my biggest mistake was to start txting him all the time. I know he is confused so obviously what he dosen't need is me in his ear. Its just hard not to communicate when you love someone. So I'm going to some friends and have a party to go to saturday. We are suppose to hang out sunday but I don't know for sure if he is still coming. I'm not going to ask either. All I do know if he does keep acting all weird and guarded I'm not going to beable to reconnect with him.

 

I don't know I am still going to take things slow but starting to have doubts. I'm just not seeing the man I fell in love with. Whoever he is now I don't really want to be with. I am hoping its just because stress and he is feeling guarded because he is unsure of things?? Well if things don't change with him I won't see a point anymore.

Edited December 10, 2010 by Jdw_Icequeen

[Don_da_Ho]

When they're 50/50 or confused, it's over. At that point they're just reluctant to let you go and if you let them they will just keep dragging you along and prolonging your anguish. I think you'll get to the point where you realize the relationship you had is over. If you can continue a relationship with him, it won't be the same one. I think you're starting to get to that point.

[Jdw_Icequeen]

Ty Don for your opinion.. I am not sure things are over I have had plenty of second chances and trust me the others started out worse off then this. Your right though I will know when its time to let go completley of thought of reconciliation. Right now I am feeling more like I still need to push myself to get over him.

 

I will continue to do this for myself.. If he does come back well, I guess thats when I will think about things again. For now all I really want is to focus on myself and no longer feel sad and miss him anymore. Im doing my best everyday day gets a little easier. I am starting to accept he is truly gone and I can't see him everyday. We are still visiting with eachother and such and taking it slow. But just because were doing that dosen't mean that I can't push forward with myself. I will find the answer. Probably when I stop looking so hard for it.