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Fell in love with my Rebound, Which means she wasnt a rebound..


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Hi all :laugh:

 

I dunno why, but im gonna explain this in the third person. Because my head cant take much more of this 'me me me' nonsense. :)

I think doing it this way might stop me crying or writing a 40000 page essay.

 

Ill call myself Aaron.

 

Aaron was going out with Jane for 10 years.

Jane dumped Aaron out of the blue almost 2 years ago (see earlier posts for full story)

Aaron was devastated, did nc, let her go gracefully and started trying to rebuild his life.

Aaron started reconnecting with old friends.

One of his best old friends had a flat mate who fancied Aaron. (5 months after his breakup)

Aaron said "Im flattered, but its way to early, i need to be able to stand on my own two feet first".

Friend and her flatmate persisted and Aaron gave in.:eek: Wasnt too hard

Lets call the flatmate. Amy. :) (i duuno why im making up names here)

Amy turns out to be a 1 in a million girl. Now i suppose everyone says this about their love. But Amy is a 1 in a million girl to everyone who knows her and the patients who she looks after. She has had a tough life, but instead of feeling sorry for herself lives her life in service to others. Shes a cross between Michelle Pfieffer and Mother Teresa. :)

Amy starts falling head over heels for Aaron. Aaron

keeps warning her and others that this is dangerous. She persists and Aaron cant resist. Aaron thinks he is falling for Amy, but hides it from her because he is so confused because of what happened with Jane. He knows its way to soon and he doesnt trust his feelings. He thinks a girl like Amy sounds too good to be true. Especially after all the hurt hes been through and still felt.

 

One day amy says "I would let you stay at home all day and make music while i went out to work and supported you" This is all Aaron has ever wanted in his life but cant get his head around it. How could a person be this loving? Aaron gave up making music for Jane to go back to college and landed a great job to support them. Aaron got offered 8 grand more than he asked for in the interview. Aaron should probably stop boasting about it :)

But its Aarons favourite achievment. ;)

 

Aaron is very very very confused. Aaron needed to figure out his feelings and broke up with Amy. Aaron had been with Amy for 7 months. It wasnt planned, but it was the second time. He really wanted to be by himself to figure out what was going on. Amy was extremely hurt.. Amy said to Aaron "When you find yourself, please come back and find me". The first thing Aaron did was call up Jane and have a chat after almost 1 year NC. He did it to clear the air, not to get back with her. Jane is very happy with another man now, and Aaron was very happy for her. Shes awesome too:)

Now Aaron wanted some time to himself to figure out his feelings for Amy. 6 weeks after they had broken up, Amy went away for a week and Aaron had a revelation. That Amy was actually the one. How did he know? Shes the only woman he has ever been with that he could see himself being with he was 90 years old. He saw himself having kids with her and never with Jane. He really want to be the one who gets to look after her. And he thought all these things from the minute he met her. But it was hard being in love with Two people at the same time. Aaron knows that Amy hadnt felt like this about someone in years.

 

The day Amy came back from her trip, she rang Aaron. Aaron was dying to blurt it all out, but Amy got there first. She had hooked up with a mutual friend on holiday and they were going to make a go of it.

All the new friends & old friends that Aaron had made were friends with Amy and her new boyfriend, and Aaron couldnt face being around them. He had gotten so much support from them when he had broken up with Jane and now had no where to turn.

Aaron had a breakdown. Aaron woke up crying for 43 days in a row.

Loosing Jane was hard enough, but loosing Amy on top of it was too much to handle for him.

 

Aaron went to a festival/gig to try and snap himself out of it. Aaron met a girl there and immediately started going out with her. Aaron broke up with her recently after 7 months together. This girl (er Jenny) was the classic rebound. But the confusing thing is that she was a rebound of rebound. And the even more confusing thing is that she exacly like Jane

 

Aaron is 1 week out of that relationship is still trying to get over Amy. But he cant. He has deleted her number, left facebook and knows she still cares for him and tries to hook up with him. Aaron has not seen any of his friends or amy since he broke up. He drives home to his parents alot and sits beside the sea and wishes Amy was there with him. He wishes she was with him all the time. He was able to get over Jane by repeating "Her loss" over and over in his head.. but when hes trying to get over Amy all he hears in his head is "Your loss".

 

Aaron is now typing all this crap on loveshack to see what people think.

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touching. ...now go get amy!!

 

 

all is fair!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

or lesson learned. ...pick up the pieces, ankeep going!

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That's so sad, I'm so sorry. Wow. I guess I would say Aaron should let Amy know how he feels, let her read the LS post, because he may have a chance.

This is why they say not to get into relationships soon after breaking up, because heartbreak twice in a row is so hard to take. I wish I had taken that advice, haha.

Love. It's soooo hard, messes people up, everyone wants it, GAH. I feel for you.

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Aaron is now typing all this crap on loveshack to see what people think.

 

Jesus that sucks.

 

I think you should get Amy somehow.

 

Don`t be overt be cunning and sly and insinuate yourself back into her thoughts.

 

You have to at least try to get back with this girl.

You have to take a shot.

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thanks guys. not many people know my story, even my mates. helps just writing it out here.

its was very hard being this isolated with two broken hearts. One where i was dumped and other where i was the dumper all in the space of a year. Psychological Nightmare.

 

I am mad about her, but i cant just go chasing after her straight away as i have just broken up with someone else. I need to look after myself first and foremost and get my head straight again before i win her. Which is what i was doing before i met her. I was taking it on the chin. But this knocked me out and set me back a million miles. So frustrating. Talking here helps so much. Thanks

Edited by Warm
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This sounds like the premise to what could be a great book. :)

 

I think Aaron should go get Amy before it's too late. I'm sure she's wishing that she was with you also.

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Well Aaron re-activated his facebook today. And Amy started chatting to him straight away on instant messanger. To the point that she texted him her last message because her facebook was acting up. Her text even ended with xxx and a kissy face. Aaron had deleted her number but now he has it again and hes smiling. :D

 

Gimme a couple of months. I havent been single at all for the last 12 years now. And when I say 'single' i mean going out with myself and NOT getting off with other people. Getting to know myself. She knows i have to do this. I need to get balanced for me and her. Thats what i said to her when i broke up. And i was so upset that it set me back even further. So she wont go near me until she sees this and rightly so. Im gonna go do it. Shes so worth it. Ive never felt so loved by someone in my whole life. I just want to submit to her love. Its not worth losing.

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Aaron is 1 week out of that relationship is still trying to get over Amy. But he cant. He has deleted her number, left facebook and knows she still cares for him and tries to hook up with him.

 

If the bolded bit is true, why can't you get back together with Amy?

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If the bolded bit is true, why can't you get back together with Amy?

 

she was with someone else i knew really well. And i was seeing someone else. I really just wanted whatever she had going with him to run its course. Without me interfering. I even sent him a text when i heard they had hooked up saying "go for it with amy". And the same for me. It was me trying to enforce reverse non contact to get over it. I kept trying to block her out of my mind and focus on the girl I was with. When i knew that wasnt working i broke up and here I am.

 

When i say 'hook up'. Im sure its just in a friends way. Shes prob knows that i dont hang around with my mates because of what happened and was trying to help but I couldnt

bare being around if she was with someone else. Shes so nice that sometimes i second guess things. I think she would probably say that to everyone she broke up with. Same with the xxx's after her messages. Im a bit daft sometimes.

Edited by Warm
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I dont think she ever felt worthy of me, which really really upsets me. I remember her getting upset because she felt i wasnt into her because she 'didnt know enough about music' (im a music nerd) or wasnt as intelligent as someone who i normally would see. When she was sick & at her parents home months ago (after we had broken up) she told me she was 'learning about music and trying to play chess'. I nearly cried.

 

She used to run about the place singing songs all day . Shes the most musical person I know and she doesnt know i think that. Shes like a little song brought to life. Shes so unique. She cheers everyone up. Ive never seen someone so in love with me. And ive never seen someone so upset (yet brave) when we broke up. How could you not fall in love with that?

 

Im a really really lucky guy. I pretty much have my pick of girls. And I wouldnt have picked her if i saw her in a nightclub. But her personality has completly won me over from day one. Shes so worthy of me. :lmao:

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