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Do guys come back only after they sorted out their problems, if they come back at all


Cherbear

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my ex bf broke up with me during his finals last semester. it was a very tough semester for him. he failed most of his classes and he's on academic probation this final semester of college. after "graduating" in may, he will need to go to another school to get another 8 credits to officially graduate. and then he'll need to find a job.

 

he's pretty bummed about all this and i dont think he even has the mood to reconsider us. basically he felt i needed a lot of attention and high maintenance. And with his own life falling apart, he couldnt take it any more.

 

Do u think things may still have a chance after all this? it's an awful long time until then even if he does come back. I'm just so bummed also and i feel it's absolutely hopeless for us. And we are also long distance. what do u think? does it still have a chance?

 

thanks a lot!!

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notmakingsense

Guys often need to feel confident and on top of things in order to sustain relationships -- so that could be a big part of it. Long distance definitely does not help. But, it depends on why you guys broke up. Either way, if he doesn't have the energy to sustain a relationship with you through thick or thin, then there are definitely better guys out there for you.

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My ex came back to me months after we broke up. He couldn't stand the fact that when we broke up that was it for me - I didn't beg for him to take me back nor did I ever try contacting him.

 

It drove him NUTS and he came back but not until he first stalked me a while. I had to chuckle when I saw him drive by my house late at night....

 

I finally got him to leave me alone and go on with his life.

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Im currently seperated from someone and you may mistrust my advice but I think he is going through a hard time, people can and do give up when the walls seem to be caving in on them. It is not so black and white to say through thick and thin in relationships..not everyone is strong...sometimes people need help and sometimes they dont ask for it whatever the reason may be. Perhaps he is guilty of not coming to you in that less than stellar point in his life..even though his family and you should be the first to be asked for help and for guidance. Did you let him know that you were there for him?

If he has goodness in him, when he see's the light he will realize what he has said to you (doesnt hurt to remind him), and maybe you can talk it out and move forward together. Just consider that life comes at you hard and when it rains it pours....even the toughest people will act uncharacteristically when they dont see a way out. I dont know if that helps but I just wanted you to consider how heavy the pressure might have been.

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