2sunny Posted March 31, 2006 Share Posted March 31, 2006 I have had several very dear friends that are males in the past ten to twenty years that have been awesome, brilliant, supportive friends. The problem being that everything was great until the wives realized that I am divorcing my hubby who cheated (more than once). Now these women seem mad if these same men talk or socialize with me in any capacity... What's up with that? I would never take their man away, and only appreciate them like I do my brothers. I really need and depend upon a male perspective lately who knows me well enough because they tend to weed out the "junk" that we women sometimes get sidetracked with. Need their guidance and all of a sudden I think I am not making very smart decisions about some things. I feel too overwhelmed. Advice? Link to post Share on other sites
Curmudgeon Posted April 1, 2006 Share Posted April 1, 2006 Didn't you know that all you divorced and divorcing women have only one thing on your minds and that's other women's husbands? Seriously, though, since they're obviously uncomfortable and thinking the worst, try to determine how comfortable they are with you speaking with their husbands in their presence. Perhaps if you pull them into the conversation by asking BOTH their opinions, they'll feel more secure. It might also make them feel needed and important. Link to post Share on other sites
SoleMate Posted April 1, 2006 Share Posted April 1, 2006 Right. Get the wives very involved, so they can see the platonic quality of your friendships. That is ALWAYS a smart idea. The wives may actually have as good or better advice and companionship for you, since they were smart enough to choose such fantastic husbands. And you probably should scale back on the 1:1 chats, or have them in highly public places, during this difficult time. Sure, in an ideal world you might not need to do this... Link to post Share on other sites
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