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She sent cards to my best friends mother


tacoman

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just a question, my girlfriend of 5 years left me for someone else in april. We have pretty much had no contact since.

 

I had not contacted her in any way since july 1st. But it bugged me that christmas was here and i was just supposed to pretend like i never cared or knew this person at all (even after everything i find that dumb and just a way to avoid issues) so i sent her a polite email on christmas day that simply said "wishing you and your family a merry christmas from me and my family, etc" only like 4 lines long saying nothing more than that.

 

She responded and wished me a merry christmas (blew off the fact that my birthday is in 3 days) was over all polite, but from what i saw had little interest in actualy seeing how i was doing or what i was up to (basing that on the fact she didnt ask any questions about me).

 

But then i find out that she sent christmas cards to my best friends mom (whom we hung out with) and someone else i am very close with. Is she just stupid or something. If she wanted such little to do with me why would she send that kind of thing to pretty much my second mother in life and blow off my mother who did more for her than her whole family and whom where best of friends ( i do understand that is a direct connection to me) but come on.

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bluechocolate

Is she just stupid or something.

 

I go for the 'something' option. So what if she sent a Christmas card to your best friends mother? If your best friends mother thought it was inappropriate no doubt she would tell her.

 

If she wanted such little to do with me why would she send that kind of thing to pretty much my second mother in life and blow off my mother who did more for her than her whole family and whom where best of friends ( i do understand that is a direct connection to me) but come on.

 

Come on, what? I'd say she didn't send a card to your mother because she understands that boundary (she probably would have liked to wish your mother a Happy Christmas). However, that boundary does not apply to everyone you two knew together while you were going out.

 

She responded and wished me a merry christmas (blew off the fact that my birthday is in 3 days) was over all polite, but from what i saw had little interest in actualy seeing how i was doing or what i was up to (basing that on the fact she didnt ask any questions about me).

 

My guess would be that she knows you still have feelings for her,

and that you want to go out with again and she doesn't want to encourage you in that direction - so she was polite & returned the Christmas greeting, nothing more, and from the tone of your post, that was probably the right thing for her to do.

 

Otherwise, I get the impression that you would be on here asking if she was interested again because she wished you a Happy Birthday & asked how you were doing & now you're thinking you have a second chance.

 

She sends a Christmas card to your best friends mother & you ask a question like this:

 

If she wanted such little to do with me why would she send that kind of thing to pretty much my second mother in life....

 

Let it go.

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"Let it Go"

 

Very good point. It is very very very hard, but very good point. Its hard when i loved her so much. its been 9 months and i still feel hung up on her. I have been in NC for the last 7 months or so but cannot shake her out of my head. Probably the routine of a 5 year relastionship. I have built her up in my head to this perfect girl, when if i look close she is not even close.

 

I got screwed over by her as bad as you can (getting left for someone else) and i am still clinging to it. I don't know what else to do to pound her out of my head.

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thanks for the advice and understanding, i think i just needed to vent this to faceless 3rd party people like you and get it off my chest. Your right, i would have been asking if i can get a second chance.

 

I have done well and been productive (got an incredible job, having fun, meeting new people, exercising, etc) the typical stuff. There is the part of me that just wants to prove to her that she should have given me a chance and not treated me so worethlessly.

 

I was going to send a polite reply to her email, but what she wrote doesn't really warrant it unless i make general comments about what she stated.

 

It is tough because we were talking marriage, etc. I would like a second chance, but that is out of my control. I think my best bet is to keep going my route and if i hear from her i hear , if not then not. But by the sounds of it i don't think i will be hearing from her again.

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