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Sad ... Remembering ...


mortensorchid

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mortensorchid

It was about this time last year that I had a bf or the start of one. The situation was ... Not exactly ideal ... He reached out to me on Facebook, he was living in CA and was moving to my state (his ex wife was moving here and he wanted to be near his daughter). He obviously reached out to me on Facebook because he wanted a woman here waiting for him to help him "adjust to moving here". Unique? No of course not, but he's not alone in doing something like this.

 

I was apprehensive about this, but decided to do this. I met him on XMas Day last year, we saw The Force Awakens and ate Chinese food (we did family Christmas the night before but in recent years I am liking this non-gentile's Christmas Day fun). I was with him for a few weeks and I was going to do everything right this time around (not introduce him too quickly to others, not gush on social media, etc.) in the initial stages of things. And then, about 3 months in, just as I introduced him to others and I was about to take things to the next level it all crashed down. I found a business card for a DEA officer in his bag and said "Excuse me what's this?" He said "I was caught with a wad of cash." I see ... A search later I found out about his sordid past and kicked him out.

 

He texted me a few times since and said he was so sorry I had to find out. He missed me. Do I miss him? No, I don't miss him specifically but I miss the feeling of being happy with someone. I've moved on from him. I don't want or need him, he's a loser. I did the right thing by kicking him to the curb. What I miss is the happiness that I had for just a bit. It felt nice for once to be with someone who wanted to be with me. Loneliness will not make me go back to him, but I feel the loneliness more times than I would like anymore.

 

Just wanted to share. I hope someday ... But it's growing dimmer and dimmer.

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I feel you there. I miss the feeling of coming home to someone at night, having a best friend who was there for me at every turn... But do i miss feeling upset when he was disrepectful? Do I miss the BS fights where he was mean for no reason.. No.

 

Maybe we'll both find someone new soon, and find that carefree happiness again. :)

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