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Seems like only yesterday....


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Oh how time flies in the blink of an eye. I know, I must move on.

 

Tonight,

 

"Dancing with tears in my eyes

Living out a memory of a love that died".

 

 

I don't know how much longer I can grieve that relationship. I keep falling back on memories to give me the hope that things can be amazing again like they once were.

 

Where do you meet relationship-material people these days?

 

How I miss looking into her eyes and feeling like nothing else mattered, as though time stood still, we were one.

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I don’t think I’ll be able to take another breakup. They’re so emotionally draining and consuming. I spent the day today thinking about moments, memories from my relationship with my last ex. I feel as though I’m regressing.

 

My next relationship had better last a very long time because I don’t think I’ll be able to take another grieving process. It sucks the energy out of me and leaves me weak, confused, bitter, angry and lost.

 

 

I don’t know how others do it. I suppose we’re all in the same boat, but the last couple of years have been really tough. The only glimpse of sunshine I saw was during the early stages of my last relationship.

 

 

Compared to who I am today and how I feel, I’m a completely different person, a shadow of a shadow of the man I used to be.

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I don’t think I’ll be able to take another breakup. They’re so emotionally draining and consuming. I spent the day today thinking about moments, memories from my relationship with my last ex. I feel as though I’m regressing.

 

My next relationship had better last a very long time because I don’t think I’ll be able to take another grieving process. It sucks the energy out of me and leaves me weak, confused, bitter, angry and lost.

 

 

I don’t know how others do it. I suppose we’re all in the same boat, but the last couple of years have been really tough. The only glimpse of sunshine I saw was during the early stages of my last relationship.

 

 

Compared to who I am today and how I feel, I’m a completely different person, a shadow of a shadow of the man I used to be.

 

 

 

Sometimes I think that in the twilight of a relationship, one party, or sometimes both, feed off of emotions, and that's why we're so drained afterwards. It gets better, trust me. I only realised a few days ago how much of a lucky escape I've had, considering things in perspective. I very much loved my ex, and perhaps part of me still does, but other than that she's really not a nice person, and will probably face real problems in the long run because of her attitude. I'm sure you've heard it before, but I'll say anyway. I think the best thing to do is recognise what was useful in your relationship, and how it moulded you into a better person, acknowledge any bad as a mere blip in what is hopefully a long life, and get back out there. Everyone deserves to enjoy happiness with a companion.

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I know, but when one door after another after another keeps closing, it makes me wonder.

 

My ex was like your ex. I don’t know what yours did, but mine cheated on me. It left a gaping hole in my heart. It took me a while to trust women again. And now that I feel ready to date someone I have little confidence or energy to make small talk or put energy into the relationship. I feel like a spark in me, some eternal flame, was extinguished and dating seems contrived and a waste of time.

 

 

I might still be single in a year or two or three. But, I’m exhausted of trying to find a partner. Within my age group, most have already married and have a family. And I can’t bring myself to go out with a divorced single mother with kids. I want to enjoy that magical infatuation honeymoon period with her and her alone and I would like to have my own biological children. At least that was the plan. That was the ideal. That was the dream after high school and college.

 

 

I’m blessed with a loving family and loving friends who are very supportive.

 

 

At least I have that.

 

 

I’ve forgotten what true joy feels like. That feeling of elation, knowing that you’re in love with someone, I’ve forgotten what that feels like.

 

 

I have a roof over my head and food on my table. Perhaps one of the realities of life, one of the brutal realities is that you can’t have it all. I don’t know. Late night musings and what not......

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I relate to wondering about having it all. I was in a dysfunctional marriage for a long time and am dating again. A lovely man just ended things because we have different political views. The relationship gave me hope, and now I just feel like the odds are not in my favor.

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