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Double whammy


Fishforbreakfast

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Fishforbreakfast

I just saw the guy I liked but ruined it with with his new gf which was bad enough because I feel like that could of been me if I was nicer to him when it mattered, then an hour later my ex with his new gf!!! I thought I was fine now I feel like I'm back to where I was a year ago, it feels like everyone else can be happy and get normal relationships but me, I'm destined to walk the earth alone forever like the Incredible Hulk. I don't even know what to do right now... I'm still shaking and it was a few hours ago now, I don't even know if my reaction is normal or not...we broke up a year ago (traumatically - he accused me of cheating then stalked me for 5 months) it's just not fair he ends up the better off one after all the stuff he put me through, I'm glad to be rid of him but it still really hurts to see it, to see both of them in happy relationships and I'm the token miserable cat lady, I've thought about settling but I can't do that either because then I end up even more mean to the innocent person, I feel like all hope is now lost.

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Cat lady? How many cats do you have exactly? :laugh:

 

Well yeah, he ended up the better one off but only because he didn't hold back to see it as a race. When you do that (even if things were going great) you wouldn't notice/get to enjoy it.

That's interesting that the guy you like is in the same clique.. You didn't choose him because of that did you?

My advice is to find a target far from those people/your ex. This can be hard if you live in a small town or city but not impossible. At least you still have a great sense of humor! You'll be alright.

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We've all been there in some form or fashion. I think everyone at some point (I know I have) felt like the Hulk in that everyone seems to be paired up but me. Okay, so in my age and wisdom I've learned that people are usually not as happy as they appear to be...and that I've got a lot of good things going on, even if I don't have someone to validate me and tell me I'm great. You will use these things and this time in your life to become stronger, more independent, and will be able to point other women in the right direction, rather than tying up their whole identity in who they're with. But for now, I know it hurts and that's okay. Hugs.

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Fishforbreakfast
Cat lady? How many cats do you have exactly? :laugh:

 

Well yeah, he ended up the better one off but only because he didn't hold back to see it as a race. When you do that (even if things were going great) you wouldn't notice/get to enjoy it.

That's interesting that the guy you like is in the same clique.. You didn't choose him because of that did you?

My advice is to find a target far from those people/your ex. This can be hard if you live in a small town or city but not impossible. At least you still have a great sense of humor! You'll be alright.

 

One cat but I love cats and make cat toys (to sell) They arnt in the same clique I saw them both in different areas separately when I went out - how unlucky can a girl get. it's like I meet a guy then after me he finds someone so much better and is happier, one of them even messaged to tell me that once. It's just so hard to live inside this mind at the moment, it's an uphill battle with 1 day of good for every 200 days of bad .

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I think your reaction to your EX & his new GF was intensified because you had just had your hopes for your crush dashed. If you were happy in a new relationship or even with the prospect of a good upcoming date, you would have been more chill about seeing your EX.

 

 

Since you believe that your crush moved on because you weren't "nicer to him when it mattered" what are you going to do to avoid doing that in the future? How will you tone down or eliminate whatever negative thing you think you did which caused him to pass on dating you?

 

 

You are not going to end up being the cat lady although if you really eat fish for breakfast I can see why the felines love you. {c'mon smile; that was supposed to be funny}

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I think your reaction to your EX & his new GF was intensified because you had just had your hopes for your crush dashed. If you were happy in a new relationship or even with the prospect of a good upcoming date, you would have been more chill about seeing your EX.

 

 

Since you believe that your crush moved on because you weren't "nicer to him when it mattered" what are you going to do to avoid doing that in the future? How will you tone down or eliminate whatever negative thing you think you did which caused him to pass on dating you?

 

 

You are not going to end up being the cat lady although if you really eat fish for breakfast I can see why the felines love you. {c'mon smile; that was supposed to be funny}

 

Lol that did make me smile that last part.

You are spot on, if things did work out with the latest guy I really don't think I would of cared - I would of just felt sorry for her. And what she is potentially in for with my ex.

I have def learnt from my last mistake, I was a horrible person to him and would

Of never treated a friend like that, it was like I did what my ex did to me to him and I never want to be that person. I know to be nice now and try and take people for What they say and if they are lying that's on them and I will find out in time, innocent until

Proven guilty not the other way around. I just feel like there is no one left for me, the last guy was my last chance and I ruined it I really did, he was so nice and I need someone really nice. I can't live the rest of my life alone It will be miserable.

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