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Hmmmm


DevastatedJDC

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DevastatedJDC

Long story short - ex ended our 11.5 year relationship on the phone on Valentine's Day, saying he wouldn't be coming to dinner. and that we should end things. Even though I knew we'd had a rough year, I thought we could easily fix things after the first 10.5 great years.... he didn't. So.... usual things - I called a couple days later pleading, etc. Maybe 4 phone calls over next month until mid-March, then no contact. End of May I sent a very heart felt letter and book of all the great memories of our first 10.5 years - no response. No contact since then. I've continued to post normal stuff on facebook - work events, family stuff, house projects, etc... but no likes on his posts, etc. I've been cut out of our social circle because most of them were his friends coming into the relationship - not mean things, but just not invited to any gatherings, etc. I get it - they know it would be awkward.

 

So..... over last 10 days those same friends have been liking a lot of my posts on Facebook and even commenting on some, after nothing since February. Ex had a big cookout Saturday and some even commented on family post of me during the cookout. I'm probably reading more into it than I should, but then today - had a missed call from ex at 10:35 on my mobile. Weird time of day, weird timing, huh? Probably a butt dial, but interested in group's persepective.

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Did anything else happen since he called? Is there any logistical reason he would call (for e.g., do you have any things of his)?

 

I am sorry you are going through this. I just ended a 14.5 year relationship and I believe my ex feels the same as you - we had a rough patch for a while and he thought it could be fixed and I didn't. Sucks sucks sucks - even from the dumper's perspective, trust me it sucks. Relationships this long that don't involve cheating and/or lying end because people grow apart, and sometimes it is just one person who sees it.

 

I wouldn't read too much into the friends posting on Facebook. My ex and I have a lot of mutual friends, most of whom were his first. That being said, they grew to view me as their friend too and while he comes first, some have reached out and have stayed Facebook friends. What I get from them is that they are just genuinely concerned because a part of them will still view me as a friend.

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DevastatedJDC

Thanks for your response - nothing since the missed call (was just yesterday, Tuesday). No logistical reason either - at least that I can think of. The fact that he called in the middle of the work day is convincing me it must have been a butt dial.....

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