sugarbudd Posted September 2, 2017 Share Posted September 2, 2017 (edited) I recently went on a date with a girl who I am pretty sure used me. In short, she traveled several hours to spend time with me and as an escape from work etc. She was very warm, fun and friendly before meeting up and was great when we spent the day together too. I assumed we were friends as she hadn't shown any major signs she was into me. She then however kissed me and we ended up having sex. I felt a connection (first time in a long time since that happened). The day after she left I asked if she would like to see me again, she said she would like to but wants to be single at the moment and doesn't want to lead me on. She said she likes me, but became incredibly distant from me, rarely responded and was very uninterested in having a conversation with me since leaving in comparison to before we met - we spoke a lot and she was very warm and open with me. This is when I realized I had been used for sex (possibly to get over her ex she still speaks to). I told her I didn't want a hook up, and if she did she should of been more clearer from the beginning so I had a clearer idea of where I stood. She denied she wanted a hook up and that she likes me. However, her behavior to me being suddenly very cold and distant, and saying she doesn't want to lead me on or be on a different page to me if we met up convinced me otherwise. It's been a few weeks now since I went NC and I still feel dreadful. I've had rejections before and I've dated quite frequently the last few years, but this feeling of hurt isn't going away. I feel depressed and angry that I feel I've been used for sex by someone I felt the spark with. I've had a hard time getting my mind off it. Thoughts, opinions and advice are welcome Edited September 2, 2017 by sugarbudd Link to post Share on other sites
LostOnes05 Posted September 3, 2017 Share Posted September 3, 2017 (edited) I understand how you feel...and it sucks. I've had women on dates tell me how great I am, just to turn around and say they're confused and want to try again with their ex. All you can do is come from a place of understanding. Understand that they are not right for you, and no longer a part of your journey. It's up to you whether or not you let them back into your life, should they come back...i wouldn't. Don't play into their games. And to be honest, a spark is nothing. You can get a spark by sticking a fork in an outlet...doesn't mean it's good for you. I wish you the best of luck, but you should definitely move on from this woman. Use this experience to recognize some red flags you might have missed when trying to date her. Most importantly, take the time to heal and Do Not attempt to reach out to her. Edited September 3, 2017 by a LoveShack.org Moderator reply to deleted post ~T Link to post Share on other sites
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