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After NC, what did your ex say when throwing those first breadcrumbs your way?


go figure

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For those who received breadcrumbs after a break-up and NC, what did your ex say when he/she contacted you for the first time? I don't mean looking or liking each other on social media, but rather an actual communication via phone, text, or email etc. Was it a simple "hi", or an apology or an "i miss you" and how long had it been?

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She reached out to me two weeks following the break up to see how I was doing.

 

But the first bread crumb text came 2 months after. It was just a text of a photo of us. I stupidly replied only because I wanted to see where she was going with it but never said anything of substance so I called her out and she quickly backed off.

 

If you do get a breadcrumb its best not to respond because they want it for themselves to see if you are still hung up on them or still have feelings for them. If you do respond (depends on how the break up went) don't give away your emotions and don't be afraid to basically say "is there something you want to say?" and if they don't give you a meaningful answer, move on. Most likely that will be the case.

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In the last almost 4 years since my break up, my old ex threw out a lot of bread crumbs. In the veryyy beginning of the breakup these bread crumbs ranged from just texting me to see how I was doing. The whole summer actually he initiated contact (I never did) like 5 times. All lame excuses. One to ask to borrow my laptop. The other for an "emergency." Funniest one was to ask if I wanted a stray cat he found (in allergic btw) Lol. Over the course of the years he tried to request me on social media. I accepted the first few times. But realized it was too hard to see his life. Most recent was 1 year ago when he actually reached out (mind you, we don't speak and never spoke for years) to apologize to me. I just kept it short said I appreciated it and that's it. And about 4 months ago he requested to be my friend on Facebook. To which I didn't respond I just left it in standstill and he deleted the request. I think it's better for me, in my situation that we just aren't involved in one another's life. I don't want that baggage

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Most never did. The only ex who did threw herself at me at a party, drunk, and told me she loved me. Then she called the next day to apologize for her behavior.

 

A few months later, I ran into her, and a couple hours later, she bl*w me in the car, then we went to my place for the remainder.

 

I don't really know what it's like to get those breadcrumbs, but from what I read here, I got the right kind, because most breadcrumbs taste horrible and are full of empty calories.

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isolatedgothic

I am Day 6 of NC. The man I refer to as "the love of my life" stopped talking to me on Sunday last week when he angrily informed me that he would not marry me ever, but wanted me to keep having intimacies with him in spite of that. We have been together 3 years. He dropped me off at home and has not spoken to me since, so I initiated NC on my own.

 

Friday was my birthday.

 

He broke his silence with a happy birthday text followed by a bunch of stupid text pictures.

 

I did not respond. Bread crumbs.

 

He has broken my heart. Those were my final words to him last Sunday. I'm sorry, but "happy birthday" followed by a bunch of stupid text pictures just doesn't cut it. I remain in NC.

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We stopped communication November 29, he sent me a text saying he was thinking of me, January 25.

 

He sent another text last night too.

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After months, and I mean months (3-4) of exgf games, I finally went NC through the holidays. Not a word from her on my bday, xmas, new years, or our former anniversary. Approximately one month later, she sent two emails, one replying to an email I sent 41 days prior, the next day a link to a song (little big towns "better man", a left-handed slap to me).

 

Ironically I was having dinner with a Bavarian duchess the evening of the first.

 

A week later she started up her games again, 1am and 4am texts and quotes, then ignoring. This lasted till Sunday, when I called, delineated my side, and told her never to contact me again. I simply couldn't take the games any longer.

 

And even after that, my friend thinks I'll get more contact, either a crying phone call or something similar. His point is, she has no respect for me so far, why would she start now? There is a $125 bottle of wine on the line. lol

 

Nowadays I have turned rather pissy towards her.

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sent a bunch of "hi"s, followed by "hey, can you reply to any of my messages? I still care about you".. at some point he said I was a great girl and that he would be my "friend for life", even though when I then texted him he ignored me for months.. my enemies for life would've replied faster for sure. :laugh:

 

that all happened during 3 months after BU, then we both didn't contact each other for a year... it was very very hard but after the 5th month, much easier. I did live with the suspense of hoping and fearing he would text me, and also with the temptation of doing it myself. That goes away, just be disciplined.

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I went NC immediately so it was literally days after. Just said my name followed by hi. Probably the stupidest attempt at contact I've ever gotten. Two months down the line his vocabulary has increased to asking to talk but not elaborating. Pretty sure it's just guilt and trying to get an ego boost on his end.

Edited by HorseLuck
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