Is it possible not to be in love when you thought?

[Calidude6]

Reason I asked that is because my recent ex, I treated her very well but I didn't do a lot of the small things I did with my ex before her. I treated my ex before my recent ex like a damn queen where my recent ex, I didn't do as much. We had a different bond and friendship where we horse played a lot and joke around with each other even talking crap to each other like best friends but I didn't always walk her up to her door like I used to and small things like that. Where as the other ex I did EVERYTHING for and maybe because I was 19 at the time being young and learning trying to do everything for her love but I'm thinking to myself why didn't I do the same with my recent ex? There some days where I didn't want hang out with my ex or stay the night. Very weird I say....

 

I'm not really sure why I did it differently with my ex as I'm thinking about her. I do think I took her for granted because as I look back I showed no care to change about some things that wasn't making her happy but it's a process I'm going through as I'm coping to learn and improve for the better.

 

Was I truly in love with her? I'm not sure, I thought I was. I definitely felt a huge loss when she left me.

Edited August 26, 2015 by Calidude6

[down hearted]

Was I truly in love with her? I'm not sure, I thought I was. I definitely felt a huge loss when she left me.

 

Seems like you were not that interested, the reason why you felt a huge loss is because regardless of the break up, you spent a good amount of time with her when you were together and were used to having someone around, even if you were emotionally not that interested. Seemed more like a friendship from your part during the relationship, based on what you stated.

[15Love]

Doesn't sound like it. That should make it easier to move on.

[casey.lives]

you think you did everything for your ex.. everything you were supposed to.. but i bet you didn't "have a bond and friendship where we horse played a lot and joke around with each other even talking crap to each other like best friends" [ NOTE TO SELF: the most important BIG thing about a relationship is..... the relating!!!! It seems to me, like you think you're learning be plowing through women for experience .... but you can stay committed to ONE woman and learn as you go with her too!!! YOUR EDUCATION IS TOO HIGH A PRICE ON A WOMAN. I RECOMMEND READING OR TALKING WITH OTHER GUYS OR TALKING TO YOUR MOTHER!!!! love is not a trial and error.. love is what you create!

Edited August 27, 2015 by casey.lives

[Calidude6]

you think you did everything for your ex.. everything you were supposed to.. but i bet you didn't "have a bond and friendship where we horse played a lot and joke around with each other even talking crap to each other like best friends" [ NOTE TO SELF: the most important BIG thing about a relationship is..... the relating!!!! It seems to me, like you think you're learning be plowing through women for experience .... but you can stay committed to ONE woman and learn as you go with her too!!! YOUR EDUCATION IS TOO HIGH A PRICE ON A WOMAN. I RECOMMEND READING OR TALKING WITH OTHER GUYS OR TALKING TO YOUR MOTHER!!!! love is not a trial and error.. love is what you create!

 

That's not the case at all actually. We had a great relationship. I got comfortable and complacent which she felt bored I supposed cause she left me for her so called best friend. I wanted to go through life and learn with her and I did take some things for granted but I didn't realize that at the time. Every failure is a lesson in disguise in my mind. I take all the good and bad and develop myself into a better person moving forward. I loved our relationship but I just been thinking why I got some comfortable and complacent that I stopped doing the little things for her.