Jmal1994 Posted March 6, 2015 Share Posted March 6, 2015 Let me outline the situation briefly, ex and I were together for 2years 8months, are both 20, were each others firsts, were inseparable and described as the perfect couple, I did everything for her romantically. We are at different stages in our life, she is in her first year at college, hanging out with new friends that are single, I am graduating this year, distanced myself from college friends to focus on my studies and spend time with my best friend (my ex). She recently developed an infatuation with someone else, I wasn't there for her emotionally due to a busy work schedule and being in my final year of studies. She fell for this guy, broke up with me and kissed him after, they have since spent time together, yet my ex was insistent on meeting up with me, and even cited that she wasn't seeing anyone, including this guy, she just needs to be single, she even said she didn't look to break up with me, but felt she had to because of what she had done (guilt). One moth later.... ...I met up with my ex tonight, she hadn't text me all week before seeing her tonight, so here how it went... She arrived, we said our 'hi, how are you's', then she just burst into tears, like uncontrollable, she gave me a hug and didn't let go for ages, I stayed strong and didn't get emotional We then sat down and chatted about our week, our college work, what we had been up to, all the general chit chat you'd have with someone after a long time apart, she soon perked up again and was very intuitive. We both felt relaxed, I believe she was, she was laughing like she used to at me and with me, mainly at me. We chatted about emotional issues I have had in my life over the past week, but I remained positive in descriptions and seemed upbeat, I told her my plans to move away in the next year to escape the dramas of home life that have worsened in the past year or so, she looked incredibly upset in her facial expressions when I told her this, but she told me to think about things before I made decisions. In total, we spent 3 hours chatting, maybe too long, but she didn't want to leave, I then played my card, I didn't beg or plead with her, but I told her that I still held feelings for her and that they hadn't disappeared completely. I had told her that I'd been hanging out more with friends, no gender specifics, but she said I was looking really good. She said she would love to see me again, but kept very quiet and didn't say anything about my feelings towards her. As she left, she gave me hug that lasted 7 seconds (I counted). She then left She texted me when she returned home, apologising for crying earlier in the night and said she was a real mess about the whole situation still, but she looked content when she was with me, she had got over many hurdles in her life that dragged her down when she broke up with me. We didn't talk about our relationships with other people, she even brought me a gift! I am not reading too much into this, she is still open to seeing me, I'm hoping for a friendship with this girl, she is indeed my best friend. I've never had so much in common with someone, she's even gone home now and started to watch SNL after I said I was watching it. Any advice about the situation? What should my next move be? I feel positive about things Link to post Share on other sites
Mi7522 Posted March 7, 2015 Share Posted March 7, 2015 Trust me friendship will not work if you still have romantic feelings for her. If you do, your best bet is to cut all ties until she wants to commit to you again in a relationship. You're only prolonging your hurt if you continue to be there as an emotional tampon Link to post Share on other sites
Ruby65 Posted March 7, 2015 Share Posted March 7, 2015 Welcome to the Friend Zone! Next thing you know, she'll be gushing to you about her new boyfriend and asking you dating advice..... do you REALLY want to go there? Link to post Share on other sites
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