Jump to content

I still miss her, but I know I won't contact her


lawbstar

Recommended Posts

I just wanted to get some of my thoughts out and hear what others think about it.

 

Recently, I've been missing my ex a lot. We've been broken up for about 5 months. I miss her family too because I was also close with them. I don't try to contact her anymore, and I do not have the urge to anymore because I know she isn't the same person I once knew, but I miss the old person. I was so close to the person I knew, but one day she just up and left. I still trust other people. I don't trust her anymore, but I am a little worried about being able to be that close to anyone ever again. I thought we were really close, but the break up came out of nowhere, and it was like I didn't know who she was anymore. How can I let myself get that close to someone again if I know that I might even really know the person? Then again, the relationship I had with my ex wasn't the best. She did not fully trust me or communicate her thoughts and feelings to me. She always told me that she was never too comfortable sharing her feelings, so maybe I never did really know her. Maybe that is why it was possible for her to blind side me the way she did. Maybe I never really knew her and just thought that I did.

 

On a side note, one thing that I keep thinking of is having sex with my ex. She is the only person I have ever been with. I don't think I've felt closer to anyone than her, but from above, I still do question whether I really was close to her. Anyways, I haven't had sex in about 5 months, so every night, I think about having sex with her because she's the only person I have been with. Has anyone else had similar issues? How long have you gone without sex? I tried to imagine having a booty call or something like that, but I don't think that would help me, and I wouldn't even know where to look. I feel like one of the last things that is connecting me to my ex is the thought of sex with her. I already know that I don't want her to come back as she is anymore. I am not going to wait for her, and I am not going to talk to her. The only conversation I will have with her is if she comes to me, tells me she is sorry for hurting me, and says she wants to fix things, but I know the chances of that are very slim. Has anyone else ever felt that they just want nothing to do with their ex anymore or to be with them? There can't be middle ground.

 

Anyways, thanks for reading, and I look forward to reading what people may share.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Of course it's normal to have sexual fantasies about your exes.

I think about all of them in that fashion every now and then.

 

You're male. We men show our feelings and appreciation through sex

So it's also perfectly understandable that you miss that kind of

Closeness. However don't give in to the booty call temptation.

 

Also for me there is no middle ground. We are either a couple or

Failed romantic partners. There is no friendship or acquaintances there.

Link to post
Share on other sites
lostnadrift

I broke up with my ex about 9 months ago. Now full on NC since dec last year.

 

I feel you man. The person I fell in love with and the person she became (or had hid from me all along) was so different. I still miss the old her very much. She too didn't feel comfortable sharing her feelings with me though I always opened myself up to her.

 

Regarding the sex thing, she too was my first. The sex thing with her is more an emotional thing than Just purely a thing of lust. I miss that level of closeness and intimacy I shared with her. Booty calls didnt help me. Couldn't even get it up for some of them. But with her it was always up even after Ive cummed.

 

I thing she killed something in me.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

I'm just curious, but do you mind sharing why you broke up with your ex, lostnadrift?

 

As for her not sharing her feelings with me, I'm glad that I realize now that is something I really want. I want someone who will trust me (because I don't think she ever really did) and someone who will share their feelings with me the way I would.

Link to post
Share on other sites
lostnadrift

Long story short, she cheated on me. You can read my whole story at my sig.

 

I hope you find someone like that. As for me I was hurt pretty badly by her. I don't think I'll ever let myself be so vulnerable to another person again.

Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...