LYNNLH Posted February 25, 2015 Share Posted February 25, 2015 (edited) Dear all. 7 years relationship. Me 41. Him 42. My first post. He broke up with me on 17th Jan (making today 5 weeks post BU)after moving away to another country to work in November 2014. The breakup was bad because I was totally blindsided & it was unexpected. Before he left the country, we spoke a lot about his move and he told me that I will move over later in the year once he's settled. I missed him a lot and was anticipating to move over later. In the meantime, I was extremely supportive. The only thing was that he was extremely busy with his work but I never bugged him and always gave him time to reply or call me. All in all, I was supportive In less than 3 months in Jan, he called me out of the blue and told me he doesn't love me anymore, wants a new life on his own and broke up with me. Just like that. I didn't beg nor cry. I just hung up the phone. I was in shock. I took the breakup badly because all the while, we kept in close (daily) communication and the break up was a shocker to me. I went NC immediately but did break them more than once with my sporadic pathetic texts on how much I loved him, he messed me up etc. he never replied. I then went on full NC. One day, his friend confessed to me that he (ex) has always planned this. Even before he went away that he told his friend he doesn't think we will work in LDR and he planned to break up with me! He never told me that. Can you imagine my shock and the pain when I heard that? I felt betrayed. Long story short, he came back last week for a short vacation and called me incessantly. While I was maintained a successful NC, I broke after some stupid heart felt message from him. I met him and we cried. But he never wanted me back. He only wanted to meet me because he felt bad. He admitted that he has moved on and has seen the world and will be dating while I was stuck moping, became anti social and in pain. I went NC again and told him never to contact me ever again and blocked him. I am still hurt tremendously (I started to have anxiety) and in so much pain. Last night, while ruminating the relationship, I realized he really never loved me that much in these past 7 years. We did have our ups and downs (few short breaks) but worked out eventually. The only thing I have felt throughout these years is that I felt he was just not into me. A gut feeling and yet stupidly, I held on tight to the relationship. If he were to love me, he wouldn't have thought or planned to leave me behind when he moved to another country. I think He strung me along because he didn't know if he could cope in the new place and when he knew he did, he dumped me. Suddenly, I felt numb and I think I have finally accepted it is over. I realized I don't want him back anymore and hope I will never see him ever again for the rest of my life. Do I hate him? Yes. I do now. I really don't want him back anymore. Anyone here share the same feelings as I do for your ex? I REALLY DON'T WANT HIM ANYMORE Edited February 25, 2015 by LYNNLH Link to post Share on other sites
Purepony Posted February 25, 2015 Share Posted February 25, 2015 Yes but its hard ti know what your really feeling because its still too soon... I am sorry about your pain but I just like you have learned things the hard way as well but I've also learned that things happen for a reason. Go NC and start enjoying things you did before. I know its easier said than done but we are all here to support you Link to post Share on other sites
Author LYNNLH Posted February 25, 2015 Author Share Posted February 25, 2015 Yes but its hard ti know what your really feeling because its still too soon... I am sorry about your pain but I just like you have learned things the hard way as well but I've also learned that things happen for a reason. Go NC and start enjoying things you did before. I know its easier said than done but we are all here to support you Thank you for your reply PONY. I'm glad everyone is supportive here. But I can't seem to find that many people would not want their ex back (even in early days of post BU). Most people still hold on hope and want them back. But I really don't want this person back anymore. Anyone here share the same sentiments as I do? That they really see who this person is and really don't want to see this person ever again for the rest of their lives? Link to post Share on other sites
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