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More than half a year


Feelbettersoon

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Feelbettersoon

It feels like the past half year has flown past, and to be honest I don't remember the second half of 2014, which was so so painful.

 

I'm not sure if its all the Valentines stuff, or the fact that a picture that my ex posted on Facebook popped up on my news feed today, (we haven't been fb friends, he tagged a mutual friend who I didn't hide from my newsfeed last year). I felt so weird seeing a photograph, it knotted my stomach. Also last week I drove past him where I got the same feeling.

 

To keep it short he dumped me very out of the blue, and told me he just didn't have the time and that I wasn't myself (as I was going through a personal issue), little did i know, and found out that TWO MONTHS after the BU that he had began a relationship only days after ending ours. (i met up with him 6 weeks post BU - and he told me he wouldn't be seeing anyone new as he wouldn't disrespect me like that, yet he was already in the new relationship with a girl who chased him throughout ours). I never contacted him when I found out, the last contact was when we met up 6 weeks after BU.

 

 

I feel ok 80% of the time, but today seeing that photograph sent anxiety bursting through my veins, and because I haven't felt that for a while about him makes me question my progress. I've been completely strict NC the past 6 months, so I haven't contacted or looked online.

 

 

I think the thing that hurts the most is that I never heard anything from him again, and I feel like I was used. I was lied to by someone who I was so open and honest with. Last year I was vulnerable too with external stresses in my life and for all that to happen on top makes me question everything. All that talk after the breakup where he cried saying he 'never wanted to drift apart, and that he was sorry for BU but that we should remain friends once this calmed down' etc etc as we were for years before the relationship, was total lies. He was SO emotional, and cried more than i'd ever seen. This guy is extremely popular, with endless amounts of friends and plans it makes me feel kind of sick that no-one else knows about this or has seen this side of him. I often wonder what he told people about the break-up, or how long he was cheating for. If people knew he was seeing the new GF while me, that wouldn't make him a very likeable person.

 

Even though I hate how i was treated, which was unacceptable....Just sucks that he hasn't thought of me, an apology would change everything for me, to acknowledge that he did something wrong.. He would always reach out to his ex's when he was with him just checking in etc, and today i just feel so sad about it all

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I really feel for you, so sending you hugs. You are doing well in your recovery this is just a bump in the road.

 

I have been on LoveShack.org for a while now. So many people in pain firmly reinforces my view that relationships don't work.

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Can I ask how long were you with him?

My ex of 4yrs got together with someone else 3weeks after our BU and I found out 2months later as well. I know it sucks. Although I have not reach the stage where I can go through a day without him in my thoughts(4months post BU), I am still happy most of the time :)

On days when I feel sad I will come here and read the threads and remind myself again and again that it's his loss and I shouldn't be the one to feel sad. They will be, and might be even sadder than you. Just not yet. When their time comes they will feel worse than you did when they realize they let go of someone who's willing to do so much for them.

For now, let them go. Kinda weird but I take it as a challenge to see how much I will improve emotionally when I reach the 6months mark, 10months and 1 year mark.We can do it!!

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Feelbettersoon
Can I ask how long were you with him?

My ex of 4yrs got together with someone else 3weeks after our BU and I found out 2months later as well. I know it sucks. Although I have not reach the stage where I can go through a day without him in my thoughts(4months post BU), I am still happy most of the time :)

On days when I feel sad I will come here and read the threads and remind myself again and again that it's his loss and I shouldn't be the one to feel sad. They will be, and might be even sadder than you. Just not yet. When their time comes they will feel worse than you did when they realize they let go of someone who's willing to do so much for them.

For now, let them go. Kinda weird but I take it as a challenge to see how much I will improve emotionally when I reach the 6months mark, 10months and 1 year mark.We can do it!!

 

around two years, but we had a friendship of 8 years before it. Not only is the relationship gone but the friendship too

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