Justm3x Posted September 30, 2014 Share Posted September 30, 2014 Its not until you come on a site like this that you realise that there are so many broken hearts in the world. Some many people out there that have no idea how they have affected our lives and so many people who don't care what we are going through, its kind of sad when i think of it. They continue their lives like nothing has happened, if its 1 month, 1 year or 10 years that you have been together it still hurts to be cast aside like an old shoe, never to be thought of again. I could never hurt someone the way ive been hurt and as someone on here told me, I have a heart, i have feelings... he doesn't, so that makes me the better person. Yes it does but it doesn't stop me from hurting and i know some day i will be able to move on and think of him as a despicable man who didn't deserve my love or the time i wasted crying day in day out. I will probably never find out what happened at the end and that's what something i will have to live with. But I live in hope that one day when he's not expecting it karma will find him and give him what he well and truly deserves. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
evanescentworld Posted September 30, 2014 Share Posted September 30, 2014 Karma does no such thing. Karma is not revenge or retribution, and it's about time people either stopped calling 'Revenge/Retribution/come-uppance/judgement/payback' Karma, or they really should find out what precisely it is. Because it's none of those things, your sentiments are inaccurate, and your signature incorrect. Sorry, but really, it does make me a little bit cross how people bandy the word around and know next to nothing about it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Justm3x Posted September 30, 2014 Author Share Posted September 30, 2014 ok if karma doesn't get him lets hope a big dose of the clap gets him and his d*ck falls off Im sorry ive made you a little bit cross but if it keeps me going then that's all i care about. Link to post Share on other sites
evanescentworld Posted September 30, 2014 Share Posted September 30, 2014 Why? How do you know that will be as a result of his actions now? And if you wish such things on another person, do you not realise just how much bad Karma you have created for yourself? Karma isn't for other people who have done bad things only. Karma affects every individual, without exception, whether it be Positive Karma or Negative Karma.... Why metaphorically cut your own nose to spite your face, that way? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Justm3x Posted September 30, 2014 Author Share Posted September 30, 2014 i have posted on the section of this site which is about coping. Some people don't cope very well when they have broken up with someone after years of being together. If I want to write about karma then I will... If it makes me feel better then I will... I was under the impression that we were here to for support, not to be ridiculed about my belief in karma.... So please don't try and ram anymore of your comments down my throat I'm not interested in anything you have to say.... Leave me to grieve in my own way 2 Link to post Share on other sites
evanescentworld Posted September 30, 2014 Share Posted September 30, 2014 I'm sorry you feel that way. I have (believe it or not) every sympathy with your plight. What I was actually trying to convey is that to harbour negative thoughts and wishes about someone else, actually hurts you more. It damages your mental well-being and perpetuates the bitterness, sadness and heartbreak you feel. It actually (although you may not believe it right now, and I can't blame you) will make you heal faster if you release the negativity and transform it into Compassion for him and what he has done. You may disagree with what he has done, and feel he has made the biggest mistake of his life. But rather than wish bad things rain down on him, which doesn't really make you feel any better, in the long-haul) try to release and let go.... breathe it out and relax the tension. Be good to yourself, and like ripples on a pond, this goodness will emanate outwards and eventually come back to you.... With much metta to you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Justm3x Posted September 30, 2014 Author Share Posted September 30, 2014 Just read a comment that someone is waiting for an appointment to see a Buddhist inspired coach.... People deal with their problems in different ways so why should other people have a problem with my belief in karma .... Ignore list is a wonderful thing Link to post Share on other sites
evanescentworld Posted September 30, 2014 Share Posted September 30, 2014 .... .... If it makes you feel better. then do whatever works. But only if it truly makes you feel better. I wish you well, and rapid healing. Link to post Share on other sites
Bella2 Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 Just read a comment that someone is waiting for an appointment to see a Buddhist inspired coach.... People deal with their problems in different ways so why should other people have a problem with my belief in karma .... Ignore list is a wonderful thing That's me. After seeing two psychologists who had nothing useful to say, I thought I would give this a go. I really think buddhism is a very interesting way to go. Get rid of negative thoughts. Etc. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
evanescentworld Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 That's me. After seeing two psychologists who had nothing useful to say, I thought I would give this a go. I really think buddhism is a very interesting way to go. Get rid of negative thoughts. Etc. If I can ever help with clarification or anything else, feel free to PM me. I would not be so presumptuous as to put myself forward as any form of expert, but sometimes, discussing matters just helps, in sharing. Much Metta to you. Link to post Share on other sites
Bella2 Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 If I can ever help with clarification or anything else, feel free to PM me. I would not be so presumptuous as to put myself forward as any form of expert, but sometimes, discussing matters just helps, in sharing. Much Metta to you. Hi Evanescentworld, we already agreed, you will be my guru JK I still can't send personal messages... When will I be able to? Yes, I have a lot of hope in this man. God, I was dissapointed by those 2 psychologists!!! The last one who just kept going on about taking medication. That's not what I want! I need help in finding peace in myself, I need to have a coach/trainer to help me get there. And then the psychologist says: "You just have to learn to be alone." Yes, I KNOW that, but could you please help me with that??? That's why I'm here!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Bella2 Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 (edited) I still can't send personal messages... When will I be able to? Hey, just checked it out, I CAN send messages now! I seem to be an "established member". Yaaaaay for me. Edited October 1, 2014 by Bella2 1 Link to post Share on other sites
evanescentworld Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 Yup, we can PM!! ((hugs)) I feel genuinely sorry that the OP took my contributions so badly, but my intentions were positive. No matter, I will cease steering this in a different direction to the one she clearly intends to follow, and sign out of this thread. But I'm glad you and I touched base. look forward to connecting via PMs! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Justm3x Posted October 1, 2014 Author Share Posted October 1, 2014 Bella2 ive been seeing a psychiatric nurse now for about 6 months... but with the mental health team since my trauma 7 years ago. Its hard for some people to understand that when you have issues that stem back years things like a BU hit hard, especially when that person was with you through your journey to recovery and then BAM.... hes gone, I just went 10 steps back. Link to post Share on other sites
scatterd Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 Maybe their is no karma here but their is in the next life .But most certainly what comes around goes around. I don't think religion can change that term.karma to some people means you usually get back what you give. I am a believer and seen myself that people that hurt others are reckless and in return they reap what they sow. Form of speech. Link to post Share on other sites
Haydn Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 I don't believe in karma but the M.25 is a busy road.... Its not until you come on a site like this that you realise that there are so many broken hearts in the world. Some many people out there that have no idea how they have affected our lives and so many people who don't care what we are going through, its kind of sad when i think of it. They continue their lives like nothing has happened, if its 1 month, 1 year or 10 years that you have been together it still hurts to be cast aside like an old shoe, never to be thought of again. I could never hurt someone the way ive been hurt and as someone on here told me, I have a heart, i have feelings... he doesn't, so that makes me the better person. Yes it does but it doesn't stop me from hurting and i know some day i will be able to move on and think of him as a despicable man who didn't deserve my love or the time i wasted crying day in day out. I will probably never find out what happened at the end and that's what something i will have to live with. But I live in hope that one day when he's not expecting it karma will find him and give him what he well and truly deserves. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Justm3x Posted October 1, 2014 Author Share Posted October 1, 2014 I don't believe in karma but the M.25 is a busy road.... That actually made me laugh..... M25 the road to hell, i dont miss it one bit Link to post Share on other sites
siochana Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 I'm sorry you feel that way. I have (believe it or not) every sympathy with your plight. What I was actually trying to convey is that to harbour negative thoughts and wishes about someone else, actually hurts you more. It damages your mental well-being and perpetuates the bitterness, sadness and heartbreak you feel. It actually (although you may not believe it right now, and I can't blame you) will make you heal faster if you release the negativity and transform it into Compassion for him and what he has done. You may disagree with what he has done, and feel he has made the biggest mistake of his life. But rather than wish bad things rain down on him, which doesn't really make you feel any better, in the long-haul) try to release and let go.... breathe it out and relax the tension. Be good to yourself, and like ripples on a pond, this goodness will emanate outwards and eventually come back to you.... With much metta to you. If you dont go through an anger stage you are not human. Yes, you have to eventually try and feel compassion and forgiveness rather than anger, but most of us will have to do a lot of hating first. And thats okay. Link to post Share on other sites
Hollywood-Tourist Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 They continue their lives like nothing has happened, if its 1 month, 1 year or 10 years that you have been together it still hurts to be cast aside like an old shoe, never to be thought of again. I know exactly how you feel OP - my fiancé chucked me after she choked me twice in the one night yet made me out to be the bad one by telling everyone that I went for her! She won't forgive me for me trying to protect myself and thinks I'm the violent one, not realising that SHE is the violent one! BTW, you look quite attractive from your profile picture - your partner must be mad to do what he did to you! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Justm3x Posted October 1, 2014 Author Share Posted October 1, 2014 I know exactly how you feel OP - my fiancé chucked me after she choked me twice in the one night yet made me out to be the bad one by telling everyone that I went for her! She won't forgive me for me trying to protect myself and thinks I'm the violent one, not realising that SHE is the violent one! BTW, you look quite attractive from your profile picture - your partner must be mad to do what he did to you! I know how your feeling, the same thing happened to my brother, his wife tried to stab him twice and she twisted it round and tried to say it was him, but the police didn't believe her.... It must be horrible to be blamed for something you didn't do, i hope after such a violent act your not thinking of getting back with her if she came running back? .... choking can lead to worse and you could end up 6ft under... Thanks for your nice comment.. my ex was 42 and im 51, he looked much older than me though... And of course now we have broken up ALL my friends are telling me that he was a cheater, gambler, liar and that he was an ugly bas***d and that i could do so much better, but he was never ugly to me. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
M30USA Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 "Life is pain, Highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something." -Princess Bride (the Man In Black) Link to post Share on other sites
Author Justm3x Posted October 1, 2014 Author Share Posted October 1, 2014 .... .... If it makes you feel better. then do whatever works. But only if it truly makes you feel better. I wish you well, and rapid healing. Im sorry that I took your comments the way i did, I had a really bad day yesterday, I was tired and everytime i tried to sleep my mind was racing and i took my frustration out on your comment.... I know what your saying is right, do i believe in karma probably not. I know i need to get rid of all the negativity and get all the positives back into my life, but it will take time. Link to post Share on other sites
Hollywood-Tourist Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 I hope after such a violent act your not thinking of getting back with her if she came running back? .... choking can lead to worse and you could end up 6ft under... I was astonishingly thinking of taking her back because I still love her despite what she did to me. But after all the replies I've had to my thread about her choking me, people have convinced me not to return to her which I think will be for the best & it could potentially save my life. I suppose her attack could be classed as attempted murder! Thanks for your nice comment.. my ex was 42 and im 51. Wow - you don't look 51 - I'm a 26yr old guy and think you look great for your age. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Justm3x Posted October 1, 2014 Author Share Posted October 1, 2014 I was astonishingly thinking of taking her back because I still love her despite what she did to me. But after all the replies I've had to my thread about her choking me, people have convinced me not to return to her which I think will be for the best & it could potentially save my life. I suppose her attack could be classed as attempted murder! Yes it is and im glad you have seen sense and decided not to pursue her, i know how bad it can get because of what happened to my brother but she did it in front of their two children and luckily she lost custody of their two children and she also lost custody of her other child from a previous relationship who my brother also has custody of... stay strong and being on here helps with support from others who have experienced the same. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Justm3x Posted October 1, 2014 Author Share Posted October 1, 2014 I suppose her attack could be classed as attempted murder! Yes it is and im glad you have seen sense and decided not to pursue her, i know how bad it can get because of what happened to my brother but she did it in front of their two children and luckily she lost custody of their two children and she also lost custody of her other child from a previous relationship who my brother also has custody of... stay strong and being on here helps with support from others who have experienced the same. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts