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What specific day and hours of week are you at your loneliest?


Johnson1

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For me it's between 10pm and 12am on Saturday nights. I don't know why. Something about watching TV on the couch and shutting it off between those hours to go to bed makes me feel like dying inside. The loneliness is a physical pain that hurts all over. It happens like clockwork every week.

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For me its exactly the same although I occasionally feel real alone in the morning too. I think its because your waking up alone now. Its quiet. Im not interested in doing anything&its been over a year now. Its more than loneliness for me though. I've surpassed that. Believe it or not there is even another lower level. Its emptiness where you wish you could cry just to feel like you @ least released some pain. Im just a shell getting by while she lives it up with new boyfriend feeling excitement&enjoyment of being desired.

 

Life really isn't fair&the craziest thing about all of it? Its her former best friends man.Apparently she stuck up for him against her best friend&since then have been inseparable. Is it destiny? Fate? True love? Or, is it her&the shenanigans and antics she pulls

Cuz she will stop @ nothing when it comes time to fill that void within her that will never really be dealt with in a healthy manner I believe. Sad

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When im in the shower, we used to lay in a warm bath together very often and just talk about how much we loved each other

 

I hate showers now I get in and out as soon as possible.

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Well.. I suppose around 1 pm some days through the week. Kids all in school, hubby often traveling the globe. But overall this house is rocking with kids and I'm normally so busy that I don't feel lonely.

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whirl3daway

mornings are the worst for me. we used to cuddle together in the mornings. i also have difficulty with weekend nights.

 

my ex texted me last night. i think he was having trouble - he asked me what i was up to, and said he wasn't doing anything and that he had played bioshock 2 all day. he said he missed having me with him.

 

we are both struggling.

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learning_slowly

I only feel it when I wake up in the middle of the night and am jealous that somebody else is now laying beside her. But if it was meant to be, both of us would have made more of an effort.

 

I have to learn that next time I meet somebody worth my love, I will communicate better and give it my best shot.

 

And so I don't wake up and think about it, I ordered some kalmia for a bit.

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For some reason going to bed knowing she's not in it doesn't bother me, nor does waking up in morning. I guess it's because she spent so much time ignoring me that it didn't phase me when she was gone. She would practically hang off her end of the bed facing the other way like I was some kind of leper.

 

When I do go to bed I'm ready to sleep. I'm so worn out from worrying and feeling lonely during my waking hours that I just pass out. Maybe it would bother me if there was someone in her bed, but I know their isn't. She's older (49) and living with our adult kids (21 & 23, one of whom is married with a baby), so I know it'll be a long time if she ever finds someone again. That's not a priority for her anyway. She's content living her life the way it is. She could care less about sex anymore.

Edited by Vocals5
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learning_slowly

But hopefully you do care about sex still? Try to move on and meet somebody new, even if it's just dates to do something different. You will forget her faster that way, I assure you.

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The mornings are usually the roughest for me. I don't know why, but it might have something to do with the fact that I work from 2-10PM. I find myself thinking about him earlier in the day most, then by night I'm usually too tired to care.

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But hopefully you do care about sex still? Try to move on and meet somebody new, even if it's just dates to do something different. You will forget her faster that way, I assure you.

 

H*** yea! I love sex as much as the next person. More. LOL

 

I totally agree with you. After 30 years of only being with the same person (and the last 100 days of my separation being with no one at all) I really feel that just holding a beautiful, strange lady in my arms for just 5 minutes would totally change my outlook about my future and my drive to succeed. Having that passion back in my life is something I've been craving for a very long time, even if it's not serious.

Edited by Vocals5
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My heart goes out to all of you who are feeling what I feel each day. I know how tough is it and what you're going through, believe me. It isn't fun.

 

After many years of working up the courage to go through with a divorce I told my wife that "I was doing it to see what I'm really made of. To find the inner strength to go after what she didn't want to give me anymore, even if it meant the possibility of being alone for the rest of my life", which frankly, scares me to death since I have an unstable employment history (not always of which was my fault, just bad luck) and have never lived on my own.

 

The fact is I could no longer bear being in a bad marriage where intimate relations were practically non existent and void of feeling. I'm not going out that way. It was a huge risk, I know, but then again life is risk, and without it there's no possibility of finding that pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.

 

I hope I do find my dream, so all this hurt isn't for naught, and I hope you find yours. Pray for me and I'll pray for you.

 

Goodnight.

Edited by Vocals5
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learning_slowly
My heart goes out to all of you who are feeling what I feel each day. I know how tough is it and what you're going through, believe me. It isn't fun.

 

After many years of working up the courage to go through with a divorce I told my wife that "I was doing it to see what I'm really made of. To find the inner strength to go after what she didn't want to give me anymore, even if it meant the possibility of being alone for the rest of my life", which frankly, scares me to death since I have an unstable employment history (not always of which was my fault, just bad luck) and have never lived on my own.

 

The fact is I could no longer bear being in a bad marriage where intimate relations were practically non existent and void of feeling. I'm not going out that way. It was a huge risk, I know, but then again life is risk, and without it there's no possibility of finding that pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.

 

I hope I do find my dream, so all this hurt isn't for naught, and I hope you find yours. Pray for me and I'll pray for you.

 

Goodnight.

 

Not a frequent church goer as although I love the community, I'm not sure I believe. But when I go, I'll make the effort.

 

And if you look at it, this is like a church, where hopefully we all support each other.

 

And I hope you find your happiness, just start believing it can happen and it will ;)

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Job and my hobbies are a real good distraction, keep me busy most of the day.

But in the end, almost EVERY night from midnight onward when i am a little bit free and nothing is going on around me or am listening to music.

My mind begins to wonder at her.

I figured i just best go to sleep when i have nothing to keep myself occupied with.

I can't seem to shake her out of my head, been month's, if anything it get's worse.

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The mornings, nights, and weekends I am off and alone at home and he isn't there. When he is gone I don't feel like doing anything. I hate feeling this way.

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I don't have any specific times for feeling lonely. It just depends on my mood at the time I guess...

 

This is my first time living alone and I'm not sure what to make of it really. There are many advantages to it, the house is always tidy, I can watch what I like, listen to any music when I like. I can eat what I like at times when I'm hungry and not have to think of someone else's tastes/needs.

 

The thing is I don't think any of that really compares to being cuddled up on the sofa wathcing a film, or having someone there to talk to when I get home from work. Or being wrapped up together in bed. Or just having someone to talk to about everything and anything...

 

I suppose coming home to an empty house and eating alone after a day at work are my loneliest moments.

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I don't have any specific times for feeling lonely. It just depends on my mood at the time I guess...

 

This is my first time living alone and I'm not sure what to make of it really. There are many advantages to it, the house is always tidy, I can watch what I like, listen to any music when I like. I can eat what I like at times when I'm hungry and not have to think of someone else's tastes/needs.

 

The thing is I don't think any of that really compares to being cuddled up on the sofa wathcing a film, or having someone there to talk to when I get home from work. Or being wrapped up together in bed. Or just having someone to talk to about everything and anything...

 

I suppose coming home to an empty house and eating alone after a day at work are my loneliest moments.

 

 

This is exactly how I feel...i enjoy my own place but it doesnt compare to having him around to cuddle and laugh at our silly jokes,enjoy time together. :(

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Mornings suck, every day I wake up angry that I have to get out of bed.

 

Every single time I take a shower, I think of her and the times we took them together.

 

The hardest is after 8pm. That's when we'd cuddle on the couch and watch her Apple TV or a movie.

 

Right when I'm trying to fall asleep is also really hard. Instead of having sex with the woman I love before I go to sleep, I have to just try to fall asleep by myself while my thoughts are raging about how much I hate myself, hate the world and hate her :(

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I'm loneliest during the day at work. It's so slow right now (thank you Barry Obama). I sit infront of a computer and get angry. Distractions work but then the reality sets in as soon as I sit back at my desk. At home, I stay busy...and drink. So just at work and it sucks.

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learning_slowly
Mornings suck, every day I wake up angry that I have to get out of bed.

 

Every single time I take a shower, I think of her and the times we took them together.

 

The hardest is after 8pm. That's when we'd cuddle on the couch and watch her Apple TV or a movie.

 

Right when I'm trying to fall asleep is also really hard. Instead of having sex with the woman I love before I go to sleep, I have to just try to fall asleep by myself while my thoughts are raging about how much I hate myself, hate the world and hate her :(

 

Don't hate. Honestly look at it this way, you were 2 people that took a gamble on being together. It didn't work out whether it was your fault or hers or both. But now you have to forgive yourself and her. I'm sure neither of you went into it wanting this to happen otherwise neither would have tried.

 

Maybe mistakes were made, but we all make mistakes and we all have the ability to change and learn not to mske those same mistakes with someone new.

 

You're hurting, but sometimes I think this is life's way of telling us to wake up and see what we could achieve rather than resting on our laurels.

 

Feel the pain, learn and forgive. Get stronger. Good luck.

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