Livelovelearn Posted February 2, 2011 Share Posted February 2, 2011 so i think i did the wrong thing..but heres my story... yeah i still have feelings for my ex even though its almost a year that he left me for someone else, even though he isnt with her. so it was my bday couple days ago and i had a wonderful time with friends and family but i wanted to see if my ex would message me. Now we were both online on fb but he still never said anything to me. Even couple days after he didnt say anything (im mostly the one to talk to him first). It was weird because he had called me two days before my bday regarding some silly message i sent him on fb and this was so rare of him to call me but i had to cut him short because i was out. So point is i sent him a msg on fb telling him that he didnt acknowlege my bday and i honestly dont know why he dislikes me so much ..i said i thought we were friends but i can see we are nothing and i stated i just dont know what to say to you anymore..and left it at that..he responded pretty angry and aggressive saying he forgot and im so f*ing negative...that hurt...i think it hurt that he didnt message me this year because last year when we were together he had forgotten my birthday because he was talking to someone behind my back....so i guess it just reminded me of last year and i thought he would atleast wish me happy bday this year But i guess i shouldnt have send that message huh? Link to post Share on other sites
Lauriebell82 Posted February 2, 2011 Share Posted February 2, 2011 Yeah, you probably shouldn't have sent the message. You are trying to hold on to a relationship that does not exist. He doesn't sound that great honestly, when he was your boyfreind he forgot your bday because he was flirting with another girl? Thats really rude. You need to go NC with this guy. He isn't in to you and he isn't interested in being friends. I know it's hard to let him go since you care about him, but continuing to message him is going to make it all that harder to get over him. Oh and delete or block him on facebook to resist the temptation to message him. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Livelovelearn Posted February 2, 2011 Author Share Posted February 2, 2011 Thanks for the reply Lauriebell82...yeah we dated for almost 3 years ..last year he got distant and was talking to some girl on a dating site so he had forgot my bday..too busy with her i guess..and yeah hes not that great of a guy but its hard getting over your first love...he said hes cutting me out of his life for good now so i told him the choice is yours..i think i will delete him soon but i want to see if he'll do it first..i also can see now that he does not care for me at all definitely have to go back to NC Link to post Share on other sites
Lauriebell82 Posted February 2, 2011 Share Posted February 2, 2011 i think i will delete him soon but i want to see if he'll do it first..i also can see now that he does not care for me at all definitely have to go back to NC No, don't play that game with him. That's just continuing to maintain false hope, and you will be tempted to analyze why he didn't delete you and you will be tempted to contact him. He isn't into you anymore and doesn't want to talk to you..so delete him for your own sanity regardless of whether he does it first. Link to post Share on other sites
stopthemadness Posted February 3, 2011 Share Posted February 3, 2011 Well Happy Late Birthday!! So what if he didnt send you a Happy B-day, your better off.You might have responded and who knows how it would have ended. Go No Contact on his ass. You dont miss what you have untell its gone. Maybe you should be gone now. I think smtimes we hang on sooo long, when we do finally do let them be. Their like Thank God they left. Hang in there..Our lives will go on without them... Link to post Share on other sites
Denillad Posted February 3, 2011 Share Posted February 3, 2011 I agree with the other. You need to get over him, he is in a different space. It's not easy but u have to. I'm in a similar position, my ex n I have been apart 2 years not but been intimate while we both are in other relationships. He for the sex n I cause I want him back but I have to find the strength to move on from this mess. I can't be a fwb anymore. We had an argument n I told him to f-off cause his a user n he told me leave him alone. Just try to let it go. We look so pathetic in their eyes. Link to post Share on other sites
january2011 Posted February 3, 2011 Share Posted February 3, 2011 I think that this underlines the fact that friendship is not possible with this guy (at least not at the moment). Go NC (delete and block) as the others suggested. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted February 3, 2011 Share Posted February 3, 2011 so i think i did the wrong thing..but heres my story... yeah i still have feelings for my ex even though its almost a year that he left me for someone else, even though he isnt with her. so it was my bday couple days ago and i had a wonderful time with friends and family but i wanted to see if my ex would message me. Now we were both online on fb but he still never said anything to me. Even couple days after he didnt say anything (im mostly the one to talk to him first). It was weird because he had called me two days before my bday regarding some silly message i sent him on fb and this was so rare of him to call me but i had to cut him short because i was out. So point is i sent him a msg on fb telling him that he didnt acknowlege my bday and i honestly dont know why he dislikes me so much ..i said i thought we were friends but i can see we are nothing and i stated i just dont know what to say to you anymore..and left it at that..he responded pretty angry and aggressive saying he forgot and im so f*ing negative...that hurt...i think it hurt that he didnt message me this year because last year when we were together he had forgotten my birthday because he was talking to someone behind my back....so i guess it just reminded me of last year and i thought he would atleast wish me happy bday this year But i guess i shouldnt have send that message huh? 1)You need to delete your ex off of facebook. you two are not friends and you seem to be still harbouring feelings for him and have expectations. 2)You are putting this on him. He isn't a part of your life anymore, even though he's on your mind. You are not part of his life anymore and the way he is now, not contacting you, though you contact him, he replies..You aren't in his head like he is in your head. (I hope that makes sense) He had a right to be angry. you are not over him, yet he is over you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Livelovelearn Posted February 3, 2011 Author Share Posted February 3, 2011 Thank you all for your response, it seems in general everyone is saying to let him go and delete his page. Now he hasnt responded to my response and he didnt delete me, i have been thinking of just deleting him, but something is holding me back because i have deleted him before but we always end up adding eachother back. But yeah i know its time to do it but then id have to delete his friends and his mom and his sister that i was close with..its a huge step. Its so hard to hear everyone saying he is over me but i know thats true. Ive given him my all and he cant even be friendly towards me, its like he has turned into such a bitter person and i dont know why he hates me (atleast i feel he does) but thank you for your advice i am leaning towards deleting him hopefully soon Link to post Share on other sites
Lauriebell82 Posted February 3, 2011 Share Posted February 3, 2011 Thank you all for your response, it seems in general everyone is saying to let him go and delete his page. Now he hasnt responded to my response and he didnt delete me, i have been thinking of just deleting him, but something is holding me back because i have deleted him before but we always end up adding eachother back. But yeah i know its time to do it but then id have to delete his friends and his mom and his sister that i was close with..its a huge step. Its so hard to hear everyone saying he is over me but i know thats true. Ive given him my all and he cant even be friendly towards me, its like he has turned into such a bitter person and i dont know why he hates me (atleast i feel he does) but thank you for your advice i am leaning towards deleting him hopefully soon You just need to bite the bullet and delete him. And delete his family members and friends, they will remind you too much of him and you will be tempted to try to re-add him. You will be less likely to re-add him if he is not in the "mutual friends" list of other's pages staring you in the face. Link to post Share on other sites
sammyd Posted February 3, 2011 Share Posted February 3, 2011 Ditto everyone else, delete delete delete!! Link to post Share on other sites
Buzzkillington Posted February 3, 2011 Share Posted February 3, 2011 I agree with everyone else, a year is a long time (though perfectly reasonable imo since you were together for 3 years), but you need to delete and block him, and preferably his family and any friends who aren't genuinely mutual. In my case, I liked her brother, and I liked her friends - I always thought we got on well and had fun. But I had to block them to get her off my mind when I found myself online. It's sad and seems kind of mean and stupid to people who aren't feeling it, but sometimes it's just how it is. Link to post Share on other sites
Lauriebell82 Posted February 3, 2011 Share Posted February 3, 2011 I agree with everyone else, a year is a long time (though perfectly reasonable imo since you were together for 3 years), but you need to delete and block him, and preferably his family and any friends who aren't genuinely mutual. In my case, I liked her brother, and I liked her friends - I always thought we got on well and had fun. But I had to block them to get her off my mind when I found myself online. It's sad and seems kind of mean and stupid to people who aren't feeling it, but sometimes it's just how it is. I have to say that facebook is evil for post break ups. I miss the days where you just did NC and that was it. My last breakup was rough because I had tons of friends and family who I had met through him and they were all my facebook friends. I had to delete all of them. It was hard to do, but like Buzzkill, it was the only way I could stop thinking about him. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Livelovelearn Posted February 13, 2011 Author Share Posted February 13, 2011 I just wanted to let everyone know that i deleted my ex today..because i had seen pics of him out and he was with this one girl and they looked awfully close. it hurt my heart but i knew the right thing to do was delete him, i also deleted his friends that i had on my list but i decided to keep his mom and sister on it...its hard i sent him a message as to why i deleted him since i didnt want to see what he was up to even though hes entitled to do as he pleases. i told him to take care and best wishes for the future Link to post Share on other sites
Roadlesstaken Posted February 13, 2011 Share Posted February 13, 2011 Ditto what everyone else said too. Happy Birthday! My ex who I have a child with and was with for over a decade did not wish me a happy birthday either. He did text me that day to tell me that he had deposited money in my checking account. I joked with him and told him "thank you for the best birthday gift. It was very thoughtful of you." He sent a reply that said "it is not a gift. It is child support". Link to post Share on other sites
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