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Anybody else experience this?

Coping Learning to deal with one's emotions and loss.

Old 14th December 2009, 4:11 PM   #1
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Anybody else experience this?

Post-breakup, I became very anti-love and was much less trustworthy of girls and the things they said. It became really easy for me to hook up with a girl, or even sleep with them and not care about anything else about them. In a way, I felt like it was a smarter choice to avoid relationships until it felt like a necessary progression of whatever we were doing. I actually didn't meet a single girl in this span of several months that appealed to me in a relationship kind of way. I guess I just felt "hardened" in a way, and my eyes were open to all of the pitfalls of how relationships start.

Lately, this is changing. I'm starting to like the idea of "love" again and I'm even reminiscing of all of the lovey things I used to do and have in my last relationship. To be clear, I don't long for my ex, just the relationship stuff we did. What worries me though is that I simply just miss that stuff because it was, of course, really nice and comforting and that my judgment will once again become clouded by what I want.

Is anybody else going through an experience similar to this? You're not sure where you stand with relationships at this point. You kind of want to avoid them, etc. but you miss having somebody to hold and cook stuff with and go out with. But you don't want to do it with just anybody. I just don't want to get hurt again, but at the same time I need to get out there and enjoy myself a little bit. And the one night stand type things are starting to make me feel a little empty.
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Old 14th December 2009, 10:28 PM   #2
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I think you are my ex. lol. jk

This is normal. Of course you miss the companionship. If you think your ready then do not go for the one nighters. Find someone that is worthy and can love you for who you are, baggage and all.
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Old 14th December 2009, 11:06 PM   #3
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At this stage, I don't want to trust's not that I don't think there are many great women out there who are loving and trustworthy, but I'm just not ready to put myself in a position to trust someone else's feelings...

I spent the first 24 years or so of my life more or less alone, so I'm sure another 24 is not a I'm not sure it's the companionship or my ex in particular that I miss...but I know that she possesses the qualities of someone that I'd like to spent my life with one day...and it'll be those qualities that I'll look for if I ever decide to try it I'm grateful to her for showing that to me...

The more time I spend by myself, the more comfortable I get without someone else being there...just like I was before my ex...
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Old 14th December 2009, 11:37 PM   #4
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Well, that would just indicate you are ....a NORMAL human being. It is normal to get lonely, think that casual sex is empty, and to want something meaningful with a best friend who is also a lover.
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