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gutted


mathos

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Hi.

 

I split with my girlfriend of two and a half years about 4 or 5 months ago because we had drifted apart and seemed to have different priorities and agendas. It seemed like the right decision at the time.

 

I have lately realised that I absolutely love her and want to be back with her, but she's having none of it. Infact, she's now in another realtionship (its only been about three weeks or so) so she seems totally not interested. Infact she seems pretty serious with this guy.

 

I've had the whole 'I still want you in my life' spiel and the 'Your friendship means as lot to me' but I simply can't see a point that this will be possible... it hurts too much.

 

I can't sleep properly, I've lost my appetite, I cant concentrate at work. Every moment of every day is just full of complete sadness and I cant seem to stop the constant stream of negative thoughts and pictures that are pouring through my head.

 

I feel like Ive been rejected for someone who is taller, better looking, more mature, more fun than me and that hurts. The thing is, she could have got back together with me because I've lt her know my intentions, but she chose not to and chose this other person to share her life with. This really hurts like nothings ever hurt before and I really dont know how to cope with it. Its constant pain and feeling very low becasue of it.

 

Is there anything I can do to sort my head out? or is it just the case that, as my friends tell me time is the best healer?

 

Thanks

P

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So you think you were rejected for "someone who is taller, better looking, more mature, more fun than me..."??? Sounds like a pretty sane thing to do.

 

She broke up with you four or five months ago, has healed, and seems to have found somebody she likes. You write that "she chose not to (be with you) and chose this other person to share her life with." Now, she has only been seeing this guy two or three weeks...I don't think she's made a decision on sharing her life with the guy.

 

You need to resolve yourself that this is over between you and her. You had better stop contacting her in any way because that's only going to piss her off and make her dislike you more.

 

Heal from this and move on.

 

Why don't you take some time to work on yourself and make yourself more mature and more fun. Just sitting around feeling sorry for yourself will get you absolutely nowhere.

 

If you came here for sympathy, I do feel sorry this happened to you because it's happened to me and just about everybody more than just once. It hurts. But you have to move on, learn from your experiences and make yourself a better person for somebody else.

 

I unconditionally guarantee you this is not the end of the world and once you get your act together you will meet somebody else who will be perfect for you.

 

There is simply no good point in longing to be with somebody who doesn't want to be with you and who is now seeing somebody else. If you had ceased contact all contact with her, you wouldn't even know what she was doing now...and that's the way it should be.

 

It is over for all time with this girl. She has moved on. Now YOU do the same.

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Sounds like you are suffering from depression. Why don't you talk to your doctor about getting on some medication...this can be serious.

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For one, don't contact her. If she comes in contact with you than be there for her. If she wants to remain friends do so without you having to contact her. Let her come to you.

 

I agree with Tony that is she has been seeing someone for three weeks that she is not even close to being involved with him. Heck it would take at least three months to get a kiss from me.

 

I'm sorry for you sadness but it is apart of life and like life changes, changes will happen to you. However you can help with these changes by programming your mind to forget about her and the pain your causing yourself. It takes allot of mental strength and work to do so. It'll make you strong. Change your thoughts. Its the only way for it stop. Either you can do it, or you can wait for nature to which may take more time.

 

Does that sound like to much for you? If so than continue being in pain. Otherwise if you want these mental pictures to stop playing over and over in your head and every other thought of her to stop than you have to put your foot down on it

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