apple Posted July 23, 2005 Share Posted July 23, 2005 Hi there I just came across this site and read 'I'm in love with an Alcoholic', I could relate to all that was said. This woman was telling my story. Basically, fell in love, got engaged, had future plans (baby, home etc) decided we would grow old together. All ended up with me on the floor bruised and angry. Moved him out next day, went through encredible grief, hurt, loneliness and depression following week. The hurt abuse causes is indescribable because it betrays trust and safety etc in that person (went through the whole thing as a child). Anyhow, I weakened and saw him again, he was self destructing big time, binging, I think he lost his job, no place to live etc. I am glad I saw him in that state because it reminded me of the horrible times not just the great times we had together. I think if he was the 'nice' person I would have gone back to him because of my loneliness and grief. I had no support, it was really tough. Well, I am doing all I can now to enjoy my single life again (which has a lot of benefits). But my problem is I can't stop thinking of him. It is like I am obcessed, it is so annoying because it starts from when I wake up to when I sleep and sometimes I dream about him. Is this normal? or am I just kooky? All this has happened in the last 3-4 weeks, so it is still very early. It is definately over, even being friends won't work for us, he will only try to use me (I know what addictive behaviour is like, very self seeking) Link to post Share on other sites
SummerRae Posted July 23, 2005 Share Posted July 23, 2005 Of course, yes, it is normal. Many times when we're feeling things, we think it's not normal because we think we're the only ones who could possibly feel this way. But that is not true. You are normal. What you are feeling is natural. You loved this man. And he changed. He is not the man you fell in love with. All we can do is go through the motions of our feelings. Emotions = energy in motion, which means that they do not stay the same. There is something this incident is doing to you: it's healing you, provided you do the work to really understand this issue. It is not the first time it happened. It happened to you before, when you were a child, when you were defenseless. So now it is happening at a time that you can consciously understand what is happening. So that YOU can heal. You will heal from it, I promise. You seem to be very self-aware. I went through something similar. A re-inactment of your childhood, if you will. If sharing would help you, I'll share. Lemme know. (((((((((HUGS)))))))))) Link to post Share on other sites
Delicaterose00 Posted July 23, 2005 Share Posted July 23, 2005 You are completely normal hun!!! All I could do is think of my ex every day.. and still to from the time I get up till I go to bed, but recentley its been getting better, its more like he pops in instead of staying in anymore..... hang in there youll be fine!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
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