zombi24 Posted March 23, 2018 Share Posted March 23, 2018 So my ex broke up with me at the end of November, it's been about 4 months and we were apart longer than we actually were together (like 2 and a half) so I feel its kind of stupid that I'm still not over her but oh well here we are. She broke up with me because she wasn't over her last relationship (she claimed her ex was abusive) but then I found out she went back to the ex anyway so... we haven't spoken since January. I want to move on, and I hate that I can't stop thinking about her and kind of want her to come back when I'm sure she's probably not even thinking of me. I know I can't sit around waiting for her to come back knowing there's a good chance it wont happen so... time to move forward right? Anyway, I've been trying to talk to people, and nothings really stuck until last week when i started talking to this one girl. Right now we're just talking, not sure if it'll turn into anything, but I just keep comparing her to my ex. Should I keep talking to this girl, or just drop it and wait until i'm more over my ex. She's really nice and good to talk to, and I don't want to use her for a rebound (even though it's been a few months) if this turns into anything. Link to post Share on other sites
goingcrazy101 Posted March 23, 2018 Share Posted March 23, 2018 You need more time. Focus on yourself. Hit the gym, hang out with friends. You can hang out with this girl as just friends but I would not get into something serious. I always find that if you focus on improving yourself no matter what comes with relationships you will feel better in general and more happy. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted March 23, 2018 Share Posted March 23, 2018 Your self talk is half & half. If you can reorganize it to remind yourself of what you told us: you know she's not coming back & the time you have spent worrying about this is out of proportion to the time you were together. Now think about the old adage: the fastest way to get over somebody is to get under somebody else. Give the new girl a fair shake & remind yourself that at this point she's into you which is a huge plus over the EX. Link to post Share on other sites
Author zombi24 Posted March 23, 2018 Author Share Posted March 23, 2018 Yeah, I know I've been worrying about this longer than I should have, but I have no control over how I feel, as hard as I try. The thing with that though is I don't want to use this girl as a means to get over someone else. That's essentially what my ex did to me and I don't want to do that to her. My game plan right now is to just keep talking to her, and if it turns into anything down the line and i'm still not comfortable I'll deal with it then and decide if I want to get into anything. Right now i'm just gonna go with the flow. Give the new girl a fair shake & remind yourself that at this point she's into you which is a huge plus over the EX. This is a great point though, I'll keep that in mind, Link to post Share on other sites
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