lawyaman2018 Posted March 11, 2018 Share Posted March 11, 2018 Just curious, especially from the perspective of a dumper. Do dumpers ever think of and miss the dumpee? Especially if it was a LTR and the dumper left for someone new? Or do they just completely forget about us and never think about us or miss us because they have someone new? Link to post Share on other sites
Young mind Posted March 11, 2018 Share Posted March 11, 2018 Unfortunately there's no memory wipe so they do think about you, but if they're in a ne relationship, that's a huge distraction so I doubt they miss you. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted March 11, 2018 Share Posted March 11, 2018 Just curious, especially from the perspective of a dumper. Do dumpers ever think of and miss the dumpee? Especially if it was a LTR and the dumper left for someone new? Or do they just completely forget about us and never think about us or miss us because they have someone new? of course we think of and miss our dumpees Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted March 11, 2018 Share Posted March 11, 2018 I dumped someone I had been very good friends with. He then insisted, during his separation/divorce, we begin dating. I was still in love with the last dating disaster and I guess too confused to say no. Usually I'm very decisive. I actually did say no but he wouldn't drop it. I told him to date two other women I knew he had interest in. Anyway, it didn't work out, and I cut him loose. I miss the friendship we had before the being together. I don't miss the being together at all. He could never go back to being friends. Pride. So we were just acquaintances from then on and I think he eventually ended up bitter about it even though he married one of those two women and has remained married all these years. If you ever had a substantial relationship, sure people think about you or save some fun memory, but it doesn't mean they want you back. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted March 11, 2018 Share Posted March 11, 2018 I count three I know of for sure.... one she needed the pink to her car and forgot it when we divorced. Two, her best friend and long-time friend of mine died, three our cat (she took it) died. She's been living with the same guy since before we divorced so I doubt she 'misses' me but she did mention during the best friend dying conversation that she missed our travels together. Based on my remembrances of some of those travels, I've no doubt she'd be telling her new guy what a wonderful travel companion he is compared to me like she told me, comparing me to H2. Puff that old ego I can't speak for any exes but once I'm done with a woman, she's dead to me. In general any further contact is an annoyance. Sure I'll be polite because I was role-modeled to do that but that's the limit. Done, over, took plenty to get there. Link to post Share on other sites
CantTakeMySmile Posted March 11, 2018 Share Posted March 11, 2018 Unfortunately there's no memory wipe so they do think about you, but if they're in a ne relationship, that's a huge distraction so I doubt they miss you. I believe this to be true. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
SevenCity Posted March 11, 2018 Share Posted March 11, 2018 Honestly, if I dump a woman I feel nothing but releif. For me to pull the relationship nuke, I have a VERY compelling reason. If there is any part of me that would miss her, it is quickly dashed by the logical reasons of why I ended it. I can't say the same for the woman who dumped me as usually their reasons are emotional. Emotional reasons ebb and flow so are less definitive than logical reasons. But despite them missing you, it's not enough for them to come back. Link to post Share on other sites
Popsicle Posted March 11, 2018 Share Posted March 11, 2018 Unfortunately there's no memory wipe so they do think about you, but if they're in a ne relationship, that's a huge distraction so I doubt they miss you. This is true for me. Even if I am the dumper, I will continue to think about my ex until I meet someone new. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
hotpotato Posted March 11, 2018 Share Posted March 11, 2018 Many dumpers feel relieved and happy to be out of the previous relation ship. Sorry. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
HiCrunchy Posted March 11, 2018 Share Posted March 11, 2018 They think of u but as a fleeting memory. Usually no feelings involved. But as hot potatoes stated they do feel relief and a sense of freedom 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Popsicle Posted March 12, 2018 Share Posted March 12, 2018 Interesting. Does it help a dumpee to think that your ex who dumped you isn't thinking about you one bit? Is it worse to think that they are thinking about you? I'm truely curious. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
HiCrunchy Posted March 12, 2018 Share Posted March 12, 2018 Interesting. Does it help a dumpee to think that your ex who dumped you isn't thinking about you one bit? Is it worse to think that they are thinking about you? I'm truely curious. I think the person will choose whatever will help them cope better and help them move on. It doesn't really matter what their ex is thinking cuz at the end of the day their ex is gone. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Popsicle Posted March 12, 2018 Share Posted March 12, 2018 I think the person will choose whatever will help them cope better and help them move on. It doesn't really matter what their ex is thinking cuz at the end of the day their ex is gone. Ahhh I see. Yeah you're probably right. My ex-bf choose to think that I wasn't thinking about him (his mom told me that) but that was the furthest thing from the truth. Link to post Share on other sites
MsJayne Posted March 12, 2018 Share Posted March 12, 2018 As a well-practised dumper...yes, I think of my exes. For instance, I think fondly of Darren The Chipmunk, who I really liked but I just couldn't get past the chipmunk face. I reflect with disgust on Stewart The Psychopath and remain ever-hopeful that life's serving him up a series of s**t sandwiches. And there's OCD Lothario John, who's still a close friend after 30 years, his love life keeps me entertained, he goes through partners like Harvey Weinstein. I occasionally still do impersonations of Greg The Egomaniac, (only in front of people who know him), who loved the sound of his own voice and won a bravery award for saving someone from a shark attack and then proceeded to drive everyone crazy by milking it for the next decade. Even Paul The Mummy's Boy gets a look in every now and then, I wonder if he 's still sucking his thumb the way he did when he was in his late twenties, (when he was around his mummy the thumb-sucking would increase in speed and intensity). I could go on.....so, yeah, dumpers do think of their exes. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted March 12, 2018 Share Posted March 12, 2018 As a well-practised dumper...yes, I think of my exes. For instance, I think fondly of Darren The Chipmunk, who I really liked but I just couldn't get past the chipmunk face. I reflect with disgust on Stewart The Psychopath and remain ever-hopeful that life's serving him up a series of s**t sandwiches. And there's OCD Lothario John, who's still a close friend after 30 years, his love life keeps me entertained, he goes through partners like Harvey Weinstein. I occasionally still do impersonations of Greg The Egomaniac, (only in front of people who know him), who loved the sound of his own voice and won a bravery award for saving someone from a shark attack and then proceeded to drive everyone crazy by milking it for the next decade. Even Paul The Mummy's Boy gets a look in every now and then, I wonder if he 's still sucking his thumb the way he did when he was in his late twenties, (when he was around his mummy the thumb-sucking would increase in speed and intensity). I could go on.....so, yeah, dumpers do think of their exes. hahahahahaha Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted March 12, 2018 Share Posted March 12, 2018 As a well-practised dumper...yes, I think of my exes. For instance, I think fondly of Darren The Chipmunk, who I really liked but I just couldn't get past the chipmunk face. I reflect with disgust on Stewart The Psychopath and remain ever-hopeful that life's serving him up a series of s**t sandwiches. And there's OCD Lothario John, who's still a close friend after 30 years, his love life keeps me entertained, he goes through partners like Harvey Weinstein. I occasionally still do impersonations of Greg The Egomaniac, (only in front of people who know him), who loved the sound of his own voice and won a bravery award for saving someone from a shark attack and then proceeded to drive everyone crazy by milking it for the next decade. Even Paul The Mummy's Boy gets a look in every now and then, I wonder if he 's still sucking his thumb the way he did when he was in his late twenties, (when he was around his mummy the thumb-sucking would increase in speed and intensity). I could go on.....so, yeah, dumpers do think of their exes. And the Winner of the Internet for 3/11/18 goes to.....Ms. Jayne!!! 3 Link to post Share on other sites
SevenCity Posted March 12, 2018 Share Posted March 12, 2018 Interesting. Does it help a dumpee to think that your ex who dumped you isn't thinking about you one bit? Is it worse to think that they are thinking about you? I'm truely curious. Both suck. If they are thinking about you it gives you false hope they may come back. If they are not it makes it feel like the RL, and specifically you, meant nothing to them. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted March 12, 2018 Share Posted March 12, 2018 I think about my exes all the time. Especially the sexual acts we used to engage in. Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted March 12, 2018 Share Posted March 12, 2018 I think of exes sometimes, and of the ones I've broken up with, which have been the majority of my failed relationships, I just genuinely hope they are happy and doing well. I wish the best for them. That's kinda the extent of it though. Link to post Share on other sites
HiCrunchy Posted March 12, 2018 Share Posted March 12, 2018 Both suck. If they are thinking about you it gives you false hope they may come back. If they are not it makes it feel like the RL, and specifically you, meant nothing to them. Yep, if they are thinking of you, it just know you just how much they don't care enough to be with you and how you don't matter to them. They are okay with living in this world without you/never seeing you again. You are a fond memory and nothing more. Or you are just so irrelevant they forgot about your existence. Either way it doesn't change the outcome and doesn't matter. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
HiCrunchy Posted March 12, 2018 Share Posted March 12, 2018 As a well-practised dumper...yes, I think of my exes. For instance, I think fondly of Darren The Chipmunk, who I really liked but I just couldn't get past the chipmunk face. I reflect with disgust on Stewart The Psychopath and remain ever-hopeful that life's serving him up a series of s**t sandwiches. And there's OCD Lothario John, who's still a close friend after 30 years, his love life keeps me entertained, he goes through partners like Harvey Weinstein. I occasionally still do impersonations of Greg The Egomaniac, (only in front of people who know him), who loved the sound of his own voice and won a bravery award for saving someone from a shark attack and then proceeded to drive everyone crazy by milking it for the next decade. Even Paul The Mummy's Boy gets a look in every now and then, I wonder if he 's still sucking his thumb the way he did when he was in his late twenties, (when he was around his mummy the thumb-sucking would increase in speed and intensity). I could go on.....so, yeah, dumpers do think of their exes. Oh this is kinda sad for me to read. hmm... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
MsJayne Posted March 12, 2018 Share Posted March 12, 2018 Oh this is kinda sad for me to read. hmm... Oh, sorry Was it something I said? Link to post Share on other sites
HiCrunchy Posted March 12, 2018 Share Posted March 12, 2018 Not directly. Your comment just made me a little sad is all. It would make me sad to think that my dumper thinks of me as some sort of joke to be laughed at. Especially, when all I did was love him with everything I had. In that case I would rather he forget me instead. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
bathtub-row Posted March 12, 2018 Share Posted March 12, 2018 Every single person in our lives affects us one way or another, and especially people we had a romantic relationship with. Whenever I made a decision to end a relationship, it was always a difficult decision but, at the end of the day, the best one. However, just because it was the right decision, doesn't mean I never, ever thought about them again, or that the break-up wasn't painful. Even with the passing of years, I occasionally think about them. But it's not with regret. It's more about a realization that we contributed to one another's lives and growing as people. It's very hard to see that when you're in the middle of it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
CollegeKid101 Posted March 12, 2018 Share Posted March 12, 2018 2 LTR, I was the dumper both times. Though, the first one was because I knew it was the right thing to do, not necessarily that I wanted to. I still think about the first one, we've had sex a few times (years apart) since the break-up happened about 5 years ago. That's probably part of it, but the feelings aren't there. Just memories. The second one was a rebound relationship. I do not think about her at all, but I also don't view her as a joke or anything. I do feel bad for breaking her heart though. Link to post Share on other sites
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